Cold humor and jokes

1. I often watch TV dramas and say, "There are three kinds of unfilial, and none is great." Please raise your hand if you don't know the other two unfilial items after watching so many TV dramas. ...

2. In the morning, my roommate called his girlfriend and said he would show her tattoos at night. His girlfriend said, "Even if you have a 3D figure, you can't change your 2B temperament! ! ! "

During the two festivals, one of my classmates went home. Due to the traffic jam, the original two-hour journey took eight hours. As a result, it was past midnight when the buddy got home, and he immediately changed his status: getting on the Mid-Autumn Festival and getting off the National Day …

4. When learning to drive, take a road test. The examiner sat in the co-pilot and asked, what's your name? I said: Shawn Yue. Then the first gear started, and when the corner was turned, the examiner suddenly said, "Eight thousand turns, two kilometers." I looked at the work card on the instructor's chest, and the name column impressively read: Huang Qiusheng. ...

Liu Bei leads Zhang Guan to visit Wolong. Under the guidance of fellow villagers, I finally came to the hut. Liu Bei was about to knock at the door, but Zhang Fei beat him to it and shouted loudly, "Zhuge Liang, come out quickly, my brother Liu Huangshu is coming to see the thatched cottage!"

Yesterday, I visited my friends in the city next door. Today, I have nothing to do to go shopping. By the way, I bought a snake. It was robbed at the railway station because it was difficult to put it in the handbag. I was extremely happy when I was robbed for the first time.

I don't know what I looked like when I opened my bag.