What are the happy jokes?

1. A person invited a guest to tea, and because there was no tea, he went to a neighbor's house to borrow it. For a long time, the neighbors didn't send it, and the water was boiled, so I didn't bring it. No choice but to continue to add cold water to the pot. After a long time, the pot was full of water, and finally the tea was not delivered. The wife said to her husband, "You can't drink tea. Let him take a bath."

The lawyer's dog ate a piece of butcher's meat. The butcher found a lawyer and asked angrily, "You are a lawyer, so tell me, did your dog eat a piece of meat for 20 yuan in my shop?" Should I pay? " Lawyer: "Of course. However, as a lawyer, my consulting fee is the lowest. 50 yuan, you should pay me 30 yuan again now. "

Don't complain that you live too tired and bitter. Like me, I used to be nothing, but now I'm different. Even the boss who is worth a million dollars took the initiative to say hello when he saw me: "Hey, waiter, come here for a moment"!

4. After all, women are still emotional and have no immunity to all kinds of small animals, such as Bugatti Veyron, Hummer, Jaguar, Land Rover, BMW and, of course, Tmall.

5. I stayed with my wife on the road at night and found 5 yuan on the road. My wife said that the money I picked up must be spent, otherwise it would bring bad luck. I'm dubious. As a result, she dragged me into the supermarket and bought more than 200 snacks.