Boyfriends and boyfriends taunting each other

1. My girlfriend and I visited a temple on weekends. My girlfriend, who was in love, was overjoyed. When she saw the Buddha statue, she bowed to it and kept praying.

I asked her: "What wish do you make?"

She smiled and said: "Let Buddha guarantee that I will become more and more beautiful."

I am bad She smiled and said, "Now that I have grown like this, there is nothing the Buddha can do about it."

She ignored me and ran over to worship again and again, praying: "Since I have grown like this, let me There are probably fewer and fewer beautiful girls around my lover.”

2. I have a friend who is a very good drinker.

One day I met a beautiful woman in a bar, and they started having sex. I want to take someone away after drinking too much.

I asked the girl how much she could drink, and the girl shyly raised her finger.

Drinking until midnight, my friend vomited three times after drinking. Everyone seemed fine, so my friend asked: "Beauty, what you just gestured to, is it a bottle or a box?" ?"

The girl said calmly: "I kept drinking."

3. A man suffered a head injury and was bleeding. His girlfriend took him to the hospital.

In the taxi, his girlfriend used paper towels to help him stop the bleeding, but the paper towels were not enough after a while.

The girlfriend took out a sanitary napkin from her bag and pressed it on the man’s wound.

The bleeding stopped immediately. The girlfriend breathed a sigh of relief.

At the hospital, while the man was getting stitches, the woman asked the doctor how his condition was. The doctor took the sanitary napkin and said: If you change another sanitary napkin, he will probably die. .

4. I recently got a cat, and my girlfriend blamed me for caring about the cat but not her. I said: If you can roll around on all fours, I will care too. My girlfriend replied: I’m always on my back with you...

5. “I’ll find a good match for you. This girl just has one problem; she has a little squint.”

"It doesn't matter."

"Besides, she is still a little lame"

"What does it matter?"

"I heard that she is no longer A virgin."

"It doesn't matter."

"It doesn't matter what you do."

"Of course it doesn't matter to me. Marry her."

6. The girlfriend shyly said to her boyfriend: "Benny, after marriage, I can share your worries and worries, and I can also reduce your work burden."

"Dear, don't worry. I don't have any worries, worries or burdens."

"Then you mean you don't want to marry me?"

"What is this? What do you mean?”

“Because after marriage, you will have all this.”

7. Principal of the Female High School: Students, you are in a decadent era. Temptation is everywhere around you. I want to ask you a question, is it worthwhile to exchange one hour of happiness for a lifetime of humiliation?

Student: Principal, how can you achieve one hour of happiness?

8. "Hey, Xiao Li, was this date a success?"

"It can be said that it is half a success."

"What does it mean?" ”

“I went this time, but she didn’t.”

9. One night, the husband came back from dinner and happily said to his wife: “Today we are in our company. The manager invited some employees to dinner, and everyone drank happily. During the dinner, the manager took out three bottles of whiskey and said to everyone: "Everyone here, whoever has never cheated on his wife in his life, these three bottles of wine belong to him." No one raised their hands, do you think it's strange?"

After hearing this, the wife asked curiously: "Then why didn't you raise your hands?"

The husband said in a panic: "You are? You know, I always like to drink beer, not whiskey."

10. There are two patients named Jiang Gui in a mental hospital. The doctors find it very troublesome and they cannot have the same name. I decided to rename one of them.

But who should change it? They thought of a way - lock the two patients in a room and see who admits that he is Jiang Gui the next day.

The next day, the first person came out, and the doctor asked him: "Who are you?"

The patient replied proudly: "I am Jiang Gui!"

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The second man came out and the doctor asked him: "Who are you?"

The man made a wish and said shyly: "I am Mrs. Chiang~~~"

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