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Help find five jokes. /kloc-within 0/50 words. ...
One day, the devil took the princess away, and the princess kept screaming.
Devil: "Just scream ... no one will come to save you ..."
Princess: "Broken throat ... broken throat ..."
No one: "Princess ... I'm coming to save you ..."
Devil: "Speak of the devil and he will come ..."
Cao Cao: "Devil .. Why did you call me ..."
Demon: "Wow ... seeing a ghost"
Ghost: "Shit! Was discovered .. "
Shit: "Ghost, can you see me ..."
Devil: "Oh, my God! 」
God: "Who called me? 」
Who: "Nobody called you ..."
Nobody said, "Where am I? Play dumb! 」
Garlic: "Who is pretending to be me? 」
Who: "It's me again? Are you looking for trouble? 」
Trouble: "which one is looking for me?" 」
Which one: "Looking for you? I didn't ... Gee, there are so many people here. 」
Many people: "I just arrived … who are you?" ? 」
Which one: "I'm not who. 」
Who: "He's not me. 」
Princess: "Is everyone here to save me? 」
Everyone: "I'm not here to save you, I'm here to watch the fun." 」
Lively: "What do I have to see? 」
God: "It's none of my business. I'll go first. " 」
Devil: "You answer a question before you go. Why do so many people save the princess? " ? How can I play this demon king? 」
Go down: "You good devil won't do it, what shall I do?" 」
Princess: "if no one hits the devil, I can go." 」
No one: "If I play the devil, how can I let you go ..."
How come: "I won't let the princess go, I want to watch the excitement." 」
Lively: "What are you looking at me for? 」
What: "You want to fuck me? Rogue! 」
How dare you: "I didn't? 」
Me: "What does it have to do with me?" 」
Devil: "Shit! I'm going crazy ... "
Shit: "What am I doing? ...」
Madman: "What do you want me to do? 」
You want me to say, "I don't know anything! 」
I don't know anything: "I don't know! 」
I don't know: "I'm here! Is someone calling me? 」
Someone said, "I didn't call you! 」
I didn't say, "Who called him? 」
Who: "Wrong ... I didn't ..."
I didn't say, "I haven't wronged you ..."
You: "I dare you. 」
I dare you: "Who says I dare not! ? 」
Who: "please ... I didn't say anything."
I have nothing: "What do you want me to say? 」
I am nothing: "... you ... aren't you my long-lost brother?" ”」
My long-lost brother: "Kao ... my name is very long ... and I will be called."
Ah ... "
Who: "I want to leave this troublesome place quickly."
True or false: "So this is my place."
I am nothing &; No: "Don't make any noise. We are talking. "
Don't argue with Allah: "I'm not talking ..."
I didn't: "I didn't speak! ...」
I am nothing: "-_-\ \" ... Let's go ... Let's talk outside ... "
Go: "I'm sorry ... (wriggle)"
I have nothing: "It's none of your business ... Go away ..." (Two brothers go out angrily)
It's none of your business: "Whoops ... why did you kick me out ..."
Why: "I don't want to kick you out ... listen ... don't cry."
I didn't say, "Oh ... What does it have to do with me?"
None of my business: "What? Did anyone call me? 」
Someone said, "Who wants to call you ..."
Who: "I really have to go ... T.T." "
Go: "I'm really embarrassed ... * v.v *" (\ \" Who \ \ "collapsed)
None of your business: "... aren't you my cousin?" ”」
It's none of my business: "... cousins of the same age (or cousins) ... long time no see ..."
For a long time: "I'm not here ..."
Devil: "Are you finished? 」
Endless: "He doesn't have me."
You: "I don't have him."
I just said, "Who said that? 」
Who: "What do you want me to do? 」
Do you want to fuck me? 」
You: "I won't fuck him."
I said, "Who said I wouldn't? 」
Who: "Wrong! I didn't say ... "
He said, "What should I do? 」
? "You two are shameless! 」
You two: "I want it! I want it! 」
Face: "Who wants me? 」
Who: "I don't want it."
Devil: "Hurry up, or I'll kick people out."
Man: "Kick me out? Looking for k "
K: "Who wants to see me? 」
Who: "aaaaaaa! Don't mention my name, mention me again! 」
He said, "Don't trust me."
Me: "Who wants me? 」
Who: "I finally caught one. Kill it. "
One: "Don't arrest me."
Me: "I've had enough, too. Whoever mentions my name again will never let you go! 」
Who said, "Look at my eighteen dragon palms! 」
Me: "Look at my nine yin bones and claws! 」
Eighteen palms of dragon descending: "What am I to see? 」
Jiuyin Bones Claw: "What am I to see? 」
What's there to see: "Brother, I finally found you! 」
What is there to see? "Brother, let's go out and talk. 」
Devil: "Shit ... this is an engagement meeting ..."
From then on, the devil really got schizophrenia …
-
One day, the white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "Boss, do you have any carrots here?"
The boss said, "No."
The little white rabbit is gone.
The next day, the little white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "boss, do you have any carrots here?"
The boss said, "I told you, no!" "
The little white rabbit is gone.
On the third day, the white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "boss, do you have any carrots here?"
The boss is anxious: "How many times have I told you? ! Don't! ! ! If you bother me again, I'll pull out all your teeth with tiger pliers! "
The little white rabbit was frightened and ran away.
On the fourth day, the white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "Boss, do you have tiger pliers here?"
The boss said, "No."
The little white rabbit asked, "Well, do you have any carrots?"
The boss was really angry, took out the tiger pliers and pulled out all the teeth of the little white rabbit.
On the fifth day, the white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "Boss, do you have carrot juice here?"
-
1, the soldier asked the company commander: What should I do if I step on a mine in the battle? The company commander was greatly annoyed: Shit, what can I do? Pay the price for stepping on it.
I haven't heard from you for a long time, and I feel very distressed. I thought of death, and I cut my pulse with potato chips; Hit you on the head with tofu; Jump over buildings with parachutes; Noodles. Everyone can die. You can invite me to dinner and support me to death.
If you feel cold, please call me! Please press 1 to talk about feelings, 2 to talk about work, 3 to talk about life, 5 to introduce me, please tell me directly when you invite me to dinner, and please hang up when you borrow money from me.
The giraffe married the monkey, and a year later, the giraffe filed for divorce: I will never live such a life of jumping up and down again! Monkey is furious: leave! Who has seen kissing and climbing trees!
The fish said, "I kept my eyes open to leave you." The water said, "I have been flowing tirelessly all day and want to hug you." The pot said, "I'm so stubborn when I'm fucking ripe."
6. Have you eaten? Please receive the short message. The elephant put shit in the middle of the road, and an ant just passed by. Looking up at the misty mountain peak, it couldn't help singing: Alasao, this is the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau! ~~~~
7, you have grown up, there are some things you should know: the sky is used for wind and rain; The land is used to grow flowers and grass; I used it to prove how great human beings are; You are used to stew vermicelli.
8. Don't worry if you don't bring paper when you are by the railway. The train will remind you: pants wipe, pants wipe, pants wipe! Don't worry, when you go to the toilet by the river and there is no paper, the frog will tell you: scratch, scratch, scratch!
9. Money can buy a house, but it can't buy a home; Marriage, but not love; Clock, but can't buy time. Money is not everything, but it is the root of pain. Give me your money and let me suffer alone!
10, God, it's so blue! Sea water, too salty! Life is too hard! Work, too annoying! And you, decree by destiny! Miss you, insomnia! It's too far to see you! What can I do? I miss you so much that I can't eat chopsticks or swallow bowls!
1 1, send you 12 Zodiac. I wish you smart as a mouse, strong as an ox, bold as a tiger, cute as a rabbit, confident as a dragon, charming as a snake, romantic as a horse, gentle as a sheep, naughty as a monkey, beautiful as a chicken, loyal as a dog and looks like a pig!
12, the beauty of learning is that people are confused; The beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; The beauty of a woman lies in her stupidity.
No regrets; The beauty of a man lies in lying.
13 I only care about you. What I care about is whether I care about you or not. Do I care about you as much as I care about you? I'm dizzy!
14, have you heard of it? Looking back 500 times in my last life, I brushed it in my life. Close friends like you and me, it seems that they didn't do anything in their last life, but H turned his fucking head!
15, two counterfeiters inadvertently made counterfeit banknotes with face value of 15 yuan, and they decided to spend them in remote mountainous areas. When they bought a 15 candied haws with 0 yuan, they cried, and the farmer gave them two 7 pieces.
16, your life portrayal: at the age of ten, learn to bathe yourself-pigs wash themselves; Brilliant at the age of twenty ―― when the pig is young; Looking for a job at the age of 30-starting a pig-raising career; At the age of forty, I hired a servant-a pig's servant; Learn to play basketball at the age of 50 ―― throw pigs.
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