Classic and funny jokes

Classic and fun little jokes

Generally funny things just make people laugh, but little jokes make you think of many reasons after laughing. Below are some little jokes I collected for you.

Silly people are actually quite cute.

Me: Silly people are actually quite cute.

Friend: I am very cute.

Me: You are stupid and not cute at all.

Friend: Tsk, I’m leaving. .

Me: Don’t leave. . .

Friend: Hey, you think I’m cute, don’t you?

Me: Roll faster.

Friend: Your sister!

I was hungry in the middle of the night, so I ordered takeout.

I was hungry in the middle of the night, so I ordered takeout.

I called them and they were closed. , but still promised to send it to me.

I was very moved and decided to take care of his business, so I ordered a few more side dishes.

Unexpectedly, the uncle on the phone said coldly: "You can really eat it." ?

The rice noodles were delivered, and he said he would call earlier in the future. I asked with a guilty conscience:

?Is it troublesome to prepare? I'm sorry. ?

He said: ?That’s not true. Eating too late is not good for your health. ?

How moved am I?

Then he went on to say: ? Besides, you still eat so much. ?

Use one thing to describe me, what would you choose?

Wife: Husband, use one thing to describe me, what would you choose?

Husband: cigarette.

Wife: Is it because I can make you addicted?

Husband: You and cigarettes cost me a lot of money.

Use one thing to describe me, what would you choose?

Wife: Husband, use one thing to describe me, what would you choose?

Husband: Cigarette .

Wife: Is it because I can make you addicted?

Husband: You and cigarettes cost me a lot of money.

When I get rich

When I get rich, I will drive a black SUV

Slice, hire some bodyguards in sunglasses and suits... .

When you see a girl in school uniform, pull her into the car.

Driving to the gate of her school, she suddenly stopped in front of all the students

The bodyguards lined up in a row to open the door for her and put on her coat. , roll out the red carpet. When she looked a little embarrassed

I bowed deeply: "Please forgive me, this is all the young master's intention." ? After saying that, he closed the team and sped away

I will get my ID card to replace it when I need it

One day I was gossiping with a group of stock traders, and somehow I got involved in private money.

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When everyone was lamenting that no matter what, they would be discovered by the other party,

An uncle said silently: I save everything in the bank.

Everyone asked: What about the passbook or card?

The uncle smiled honestly: Burn it,

When you need to use it, you can get the ID card to replace it.

Internet access is still fun

When weekends come, I like to stay at home and surf the Internet.

Today I decided to unplug the network cable, turn off the computer, and go out for a walk in the sunshine. ,

When it gets dark, meet some friends you haven’t seen for a long time and find a place

to have a drink, chat, and do whatever you want.

At the end of the day, you will find that surfing the Internet is still interesting!

Seeing the girl you like

Seeing the girl you like

So he walked over and covered her eyes: Who do you think I am?

Yu Xiaoming, bingo, guess what I want to do!?

Me How do you know, please let me go!?

The girl said a little coquettishly.

? Then let me give you a hint, are you waiting for the No. 72 bus?

? That’s right. ?So I took down the hand that covered her eyes: ?Look ahead, we just drove away. ?

Thank you for tasting!

One day I saw a couple buying drinks. After the woman unscrewed the bottle cap: Husband, what does another bottle mean? The man said: have no idea. Then he threw the bottle cap away and left.

I ran to pick up these two idiots: Damn, thank you for tasting them!

A sentence floated from the distance: Look, I knew there was something evil to pick up

It’s not as comfortable as sleeping on the bed

Teacher: Do you realize the shortcomings of sleeping in class?

Student: I do. ?

Teacher: What is the disadvantage?

Student: The disadvantage is that it is not as comfortable as sleeping in bed. ?

I lied about my age

A 70-year-old rich man recently married a young girl. When a friend asked for the secret, the old man smiled: "I lied about my age." ?Friend:?You said you are only 50 years old?Old man:?No, I said I am already 90 years old. ?;