Japanese students’ jokes

After coming to Japan, I worked as a student and as a Chinese teacher. I have been teaching Chinese for eight years since I was a part-time teacher. I wrote down a lot of jokes told by students in my previous blog, but as time went by, they were flooded and I forgot about them. Turn them out for an after-dinner treat.

First, a Japanese student I taught before angrily told me an experience in China. He said that the taxi fare in China was 45 yuan, and he gave the driver 100 yuan. The driver returned it to him and said, "Your 100 yuan ticket has a dog-eared corner. I won't accept it. Please exchange it for another one." He gave one to the driver, but the driver said that this one didn't work either, so he had to give it to another one. So he had to change another one. The driver accepted the third ticket and gave him 55 yuan in change.

After arriving at the hotel, he checked in and paid a deposit. Unexpectedly, the hotel staff told him that two 100-yuan bills were counterfeit. It turned out that the driver had already done something secretly when he asked him to change money, and the hundred-yuan bills he gave him twice were counterfeit. Only then did he realize that he had been deceived, so he took out the 55 yuan that was given to him and ran it through a banknote detector. Even the 50 yuan was found to be a counterfeit.

He told me that he lost 350 yuan. I was very embarrassed after hearing all these bad things happening in China, and I couldn’t tell him to be careful of scammers in China, so I had to comfort him and say, okay, you paid 300 yuan, and 45 yuan was the fare. The remaining 5 yuan is real, so you only lost 250 yuan, not that much, okay, okay.

He calculated silently in his mind, finally nodded and said in Chinese, it’s 250, it’s 250. . . .

I know I am really unkind, but I can have deep sympathy for him and at the same time I can't help but laugh because of this number.

Second, the junior class studied my family and asked the students: Do you prefer to live alone or with your parents?

Student 1: I started to feel that it was troublesome to live with my parents. They didn’t let me watch TV until late. But it's even more troublesome for me to live alone now. There's no one to help me cook, wash clothes, or clean my room. So I want to live alone, but let my mother come and help me with housework every day.

Student 2: I want to live with my mother, not my father. Because although my mother is troublesome, she can still work for me. Dad doesn't work, he's just trouble.

Third, talk about my ideals. One student said: My ideal is to be a rich man. Because my father is not a rich man, I wanted to buy things when I was a child, but my mother always said: "Our family has no money." So I want to be rich. When I have a child, I can buy him a lot of things.

Fourth, ask a student who went to Peking University to study during the summer vacation, what is his impression of Peking University? The student said: "My best impression of Peking University is that the library of Peking University is also very large, the campus is also very large, the cafeteria is also very large, the roads are very large, and the Shaoyuan Garden is also very large. The worst impression is that I It’s a bit surprising that the lovers among Peking University students are so close in the classroom, in the library, in the cafeteria, and on the road.”

Five,

A student is doing Chinese. During the speech, I first wrote a line of words on the blackboard

Sendai Mito Nagoya

Underneath, Japanese students began to snicker and whisper.

The students asked me, teacher, do you know what these three cities mean in Japan?

I shook my head to express that I didn’t know.

Students said that these are the three cities in Japan where women make fools of themselves.

The students below burst into laughter. The naughty boys in the class began to ask: "Is there anyone from Nagoya?"

The girls quickly waved their hands and denied it. Laugh again.

The student who gave the speech went on to say that she had lived in Nagoya for half a year and felt that the women in Nagoya were not ugly. They love to be beautiful and are good at dressing up. They have different styles from Tokyo women. For example, they like curly hair. The distinctive curly hair is now called "Nagoya Curly", and so on.

But the naughty boy began to retort, saying that his hometown is very close to Nagoya. Before going to college, he went to Nagoya almost every month. He felt that the women in Nagoya were really not good-looking. . .

The girl who posted said, yes, I have heard many boys say this. Boys think that women in Nagoya are not good-looking. Why is this?

The boys said, well, anyway, we boys look at it and feel that the girls in Nagoya are not as beautiful as the girls in Tokyo.

As a foreign teacher, I couldn’t get a word in, so I had to watch with interest the students in the class arguing about the beauty and ugliness of women in broken Chinese. It seems that human beings are really the same. As long as it is a topic of interest, no matter how strenuous a foreign language is, the quarrel can still be lively.

In the end, the quarrel broke out. Our supervisor, Mr. Murakami, quietly raised his hands, teachers and classmates, my wife is from Nagoya.

The argument came to an abrupt end, followed by laughter.

"Which city in China has as many ugly women as Nagoya?" Teacher Murakami asked.

I said no. We Chinese are kind and only choose places with beautiful women.

Six,

When I was a teacher at Waseda University, there was a particularly beautiful girl in my class, with long soft black hair, big eyes and snow-white skin. If she had another little cherry mouth, she would be the beauty in Japanese cartoons. It's a pity that her mouth is a little too big. That's fine, she has some mature beauty of a big girl.

She told me that her father is a brain doctor. Mom was a nurse in that hospital before she got married. After getting married, she quit her job and became a housewife.

I didn’t think much about it at first. It was a very common marriage. There was a beautiful daughter studying in a first-class private university and two dogs at home. At first glance, it looked like a happy middle-class family.

Once that girl told me that she planned not to work after getting married, but to cook for her husband at home every day and wait for him to come home.

I asked why.

She said that her mother always told her about things in the hospital before. The relationship between female doctors and female nurses in the hospital has always been tense because they both want to marry male doctors. Later, her mother defeated many female doctor rivals and successfully married her father.

So her mother concluded that as a woman, academic qualifications are useless, status is useless, the key is to find a good man. When it comes to how to find a good man, those educated female doctors are simply not as good as her.

That female student has a very lovable character, gentle as water, quiet and upright. I was always very busy on Saturdays. I often had to rush to teach their class before I had time to eat at noon. This little girl knew about it and once baked cookies for me and brought them to the classroom. In the future, I will inevitably take care of her more.

Sometimes I am curious, wondering what kind of mother she had, who taught her such a powerful weapon as a woman.

Sometimes, I feel disappointed. Such a girl doesn’t know whose family she will end up with in the future, or who she will wash clothes and cook for every day.