Short jokes that make your stomach hurt from laughing so hard

Short jokes that make you laugh until your stomach hurts

Jokes are short in length, simple and clever in plot, and give you a wonderful feeling of laughter all of a sudden. Most of them reveal the truth about life. The absurd phenomenon is sarcastic and entertaining. The key point is not to use cumbersome expressions when telling jokes with friends. Everyone’s laughter is the motivation for our work!

Short jokes that make your stomach hurt from laughing 1 < /p>

Relatively short and funny jokes are as follows:

1. Give you a watermelon. When you are in a bad mood, you can cut it with a knife and peel it. At the same time, you can Let me vent a bit and shout loudly: I will kill the melon, I will kill the melon, I will kill the melon.

2. I met a beggar at the station. He held a piece of paper in his hand and wrote: I am a deaf-mute, please give me some charity. I suspected that he was a liar, so I said: Sorry, I don’t know the words.

Then he spoke: Brother, my wallet was stolen and I have no money to buy a ticket home. Please lend me some money. I was surprised: aren’t you deaf-mute? He was also surprised: Don’t you know how to read?

3. Someone just learned to ride a bicycle when he was a child. He ran to the street before he knew how to ride a bicycle. He saw an old man walking in front of him. He felt that he was going to bump into him, so he yelled, "Don't move, don't move." move. The old man stood there without moving, but he turned around and bumped into him. The old man stood up and said, "You are aiming."

4. I was walking on the road just now when I answered a strange phone call. A woman said, "Hello! Congratulations on winning the second prize of 300,000 yuan from our company!" Before I could speak, She laughed to herself and said, "Sorry, it's my first time lying to someone, I couldn't help it." Then she hung up, leaving me standing messy in the wind.

5. A girl was made to run laps on the playground because she was late for class. Unexpectedly, it started to rain, so the girl had to run in the rain. This is a boy holding an umbrella, running beside her, and moving the umbrella above the girl's head.

When the girl realized that the boy had been watching her for a long time, she immediately blushed and said in a low voice, "I'm sorry, I have a boyfriend..." The boy lowered his head and thought for a moment, then said to her affectionately. The girl said: "Do you want it? This umbrella costs ten yuan..."

In human history, since the emergence of language, joking language has appeared. It was first passed down by word of mouth, and later there were written words. Many jokes were recorded and compiled into books;

There are also many jokes that are spread among the people. In today's society, there are many jokes every day. If people are interested, I think there will be some in the future if they collect them. value, while enriching the treasure trove of jokes. With the rapid development of the Internet and mobile phones in the past ten years, Internet jokes have emerged; short jokes that make you laugh until your stomach hurts 2

1. I dreamed that God said he could grant me a wish, and I took it out The Globe said he wanted world peace, but he said it was too difficult and that he should change it. I took out your photo and said I wanted it to be more beautiful. He thought for a moment and said, "Bring the globe back and I'll take a look at it!" ..

　2.1 Day

A pair of fly mother and son had lunch together

The son asked the fly mother: Why do we eat poop every day

The mother fly said angrily: Don’t say such disgusting words while eating, eat while it’s hot!!

3. When the nurse saw a patient drinking in the ward, she walked over and whispered to him: "Be careful!" the patient said with a smile, "Baby.

”

4One time

I saw a very beautiful girl on the bus

I thought of a way: I quietly handed her a On the note (Can I be friends with you? If you can, please hand the note back, if not, just throw it away and let it go with the wind!) After a while, the girl really handed the note back, I secretly thought that I was quite attractive. When I saw it, it said (Sorry, the window cannot be opened.

5. A shooting star flashed across the night sky, and Laifu quickly made a wish, hoping that he would He could become more handsome, but just after he made his wish, Meteor came back and said to Laifu: Brother! Are you really trying to make things difficult for me?

Mom: "Look at your hands. Dirty! When have you ever seen my hands as dirty as yours?

Daughter: "No, Mom. I have never seen a police dog on the road." An ordinary dog ??came over and ran to question it fiercely: I am a police dog, what are you? The ordinary dog ??looked at it with disdain and said: Idiot, look clearly, I am a plainclothes man! p> 2. I have a request: Treat me to a meal. I hope you can satisfy me. Otherwise, I will write your mobile phone number on the wall and add two words in front of it: Treat me to a meal. Or just write: Marriage is open to both men and women, no conditions are required.

3. A cannibal father and his son captured a thin man. The father said: Let go, there is no meat! , his father said: Let go, it’s too greasy! His son captured another beautiful woman, and his father said: Take it home and eat your mother at night.

4. One day we went to a wishing well. I bent down and made a wish and threw a coin into the well. You also wanted to make a wish.

But when you bent down, you accidentally fell into the well. I was shocked and murmured to myself. : It’s so spiritual!

5. You and I are both angels with one wing. Only by embracing each other can we spread our wings and fly. I came to the world just to find you, but I found you after going through so much trouble. : TMD! Our wings are the same!

6. The four-year-old boy kissed the three-year-old girl, and the girl said to the boy: You must be responsible for kissing me. The boy patted the girl's shoulder maturely and said with a smile: Don't worry, we are not children of one or two years old anymore!

7. Late at night, Bush saw Bin Laden standing in front of his bed and criticized him. Bush was shocked and said: You are so bold, you dare to break into the White House at night! Bin Laden shook his chest-length beard, smiled sinisterly, and said: Rejoice, you are so confident!

8. Monkey Picking! When it saw a card, it wanted to see what it was, so it climbed to a branch to look. At this time, a lightning struck it and said: It turned out to be an IP card!

9. Zheng Xiding’s wife. When she didn't see her husband, she went to her father-in-law's house to look for her. When she saw her father-in-law washing her face, she asked him, "Dad, where is Xiding?" p>

10. Mouse: I am in love with a bat now. From now on, the children will live in the air and will not be afraid of you cats. The cat sneered, pointed at the owl on the tree and said: Did you see, she is already pregnant with my child!

11. When wolves invade, the small animals set up death squads to fight. Mantis: I have two swords. Hedgehog: I'm covered in hidden weapons. The longhorned beetle shook its tentacles and sang: Hum! I have nunchuck nunchaku! Huh huh haha!

12. The nature class teacher asked: Why is the body cold after death? No one answered. The teacher asked again: Doesn't anyone know? At this time, a classmate stood up and said: That's because the mind is naturally cool.