A humorous joke that can't stand laughing.

A humorous joke that can't stand laughing.

1, one day Lao Zhang got off the train and met a coquettish girl and asked: How much is the girl?

Sister: Sorry, sir. I'm waiting for someone.

Lao Zhang: 100.

Sister: Sir, I'm really waiting for someone.

Lao Zhang: 200.

Sister: Sir, how could you? I am really waiting for someone.

Lao Zhang: 500.

Sister: Oh, I'm waiting for you.

2, the second goods asked me:? What do surgery and emotion have in common? I guess that idiot is testing me.

Ha, it's so simple. The same one? Moving? Words! I answered proudly.

Unexpectedly, the next sister's eyes looked down: Are you too ignorant? People all over the world know it's time for bed, right? !

One of my comrades went to take a bath to find his little sister. When he finished, he asked what to do if he didn't do it in the future!

Little sister said a sentence:? what can I do? Marry a soldier! ?

Cousin ate carelessly, and a grain of rice fell on the bra. I asked: which part did you eat?

My cousin looked at me and said, how many legs do you want to walk on? As soon as I bowed my head, the pants door closed.

5. Now there is a brand-new idiom: [Malaysia], which describes a person who is dishonest and fabricates lies! Usage: You are really Malaysia!

6. My brother took his younger brother to get his passport. After giving the photo to the staff, the staff stared at the photo for a long time, but then they took a look at the two brothers.

Q:? Which of you has a passport?

The brother said:? I want to do it. Do you think our brothers look alike?

The staff threw the photos in front of them: Then you can't hand in a fucking photo! ?

7. I weigh 200 Jin. I went out to take a taxi. This is a QQ. I take the copilot. After driving for a while, the driver suddenly stopped and said to me, can you sit there? Floating around here.

8. I went to my sister's house to play at the weekend and found a little rice in a plastic plate in the kitchen, which is obviously for pets. But after thinking about it for a long time, I didn't expect any pets at home.

While wondering, my sister came in and said with a smile, Your brother-in-law is on a business trip and there is a mouse at home. Don't dare to catch it, for fear that it will bite something indiscriminately, just keep it first. ?

9. Three famous sayings: Boss/this tea egg money/I'll pay for her?

10, loves tea, tearfully spent 30,000 yuan to buy a catty of tea, but the daughter-in-law used it to cook tea eggs the next day. I hated it, raised my hand and gave her a slap in the face. I was furious: can tea eggs be cooked with such cheap tea? ! ?

1 1. There is an old lady selling tea eggs. The first time, she sold more than half of the tea eggs in the pot, and the second time, she sold more than two of the remaining half. Now there are 1 tea eggs left in the pot. How many suites does this old lady have in the city?

12 Suddenly a big man came out of the grass, which scared Xiaomei into a cold sweat. Han just said: robbery ... The voice did not fall,

Xiaomei swallowed all three tea eggs in her hand in one breath.

The big fellow went on to say, sister ... can you tell me how to get to Block B of Garden Square?

13, we had a drink at the classmate party yesterday, and everyone was bragging about how they were doing.

When it was my turn, I said quietly: Forget it. I won't talk about it if I'm having a bad life. ?

I had no choice but to take out a tea egg from my pocket to show my net worth, and then I became the protagonist of the party. My classmates asked me how I got rich.

14, I want to marry you. You said you wanted a room, but I didn't say anything. I quietly worked hard to make money and bought a suite. Later, you said you wanted to have a car, but I still didn't say anything. I made money silently and bought a car.

Now you fucking tell me there are tea eggs? Sorry, I can't afford to get married.

15, after thinking for a long time, I finally made up my mind to let my local friends bring me back a legendary one? Tea eggs? , so excited! It's the first time I've seen this high-end and high-end thing. Do I need to peel it when I eat it? How much eloquence do you want to eat? Is it better to use forks or chopsticks? Do you want to wear a suit to show off? How about standing and sitting? Do you want to tip the waiter? Can I still pay off this egg in my life? !

16, the old lady selling tea eggs passed the bridge, her car accidentally overturned and the tea eggs fell into the river. At this time, the river god took out a car full of silver eggs and asked, yours? The old lady shook her head.

The river god took out another car full of golden eggs and asked? Is it yours? The old lady shook her head again.

The river god said:? Honest mortal, you have passed the test of God, and I have decided to give you all the golden eggs and silver eggs. ?

The old lady swore: Fuck you! The crashed car is much more expensive than this! ?

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