Recommend a few healthy and positive jokes. The ones on the Internet are either too disgusting or too colorful. I really can't find a good one, so I have to ask the experts.

When riding a motorcycle, a person likes to wear clothes backwards, that is, button the back to keep out the wind. One day, he was driving under the influence of alcohol, overturned and fell headlong on the roadside.

After the police arrived ...

Policeman A: What a terrible car accident.

Policeman B: Yes, I hit my head in the back.

Officer A: Well, he is still breathing. Let's help him turn his head back.

police officer b: ok ... one, two, push hard, and turn back.

Policeman A: Well, I'm not breathing ...

Q: Who is the darkest cartoon character in the world?

A: Robot Cat

Why: Because he can't see his fingers

Q: Who is the most compassionate cartoon character in the world?

A: It's still a robot cat

Why: Because he always reaches out his round hand to people!

A high school boy called his girlfriend in the middle of the night to fall in love.

Unfortunately, I was received by the girl's mother. After asking about her purpose, her girlfriend's mother was very unhappy and asked, "What's your last name?

The boy said, "My last name is Wei.

the mother asked again, "Wei what?

At this moment, the man nervously replied, "I don't know why? My father's surname is Wei, too.

A man was starving in the desert when he found the magic lamp.

magic lamp: "I can only realize one wish of yours. Come on, I'm in a hurry.

Man: "I want a wife ..."

The magic lamp immediately turned into a beautiful woman, and then said disdainfully, "I'm starving and I'm still greedy for beauty! Pathetic! "Say that finish disappeared.

person: "... bread.

(An old woman's cake is a kind of cake)

A man ventured alone in the forest and suddenly found himself surrounded by cannibals. Then he shouted to the sky, "I'm dead, God help me!"!

I saw a voice coming from the light in the sky: "Not necessarily, you can pick up another big stone on the ground and smash the leader to death. "So he picked up the biggest stone on the ground and smashed it at the Sheikh, just killing him. All the people stayed for a while, and then glared at each other. At this time, there was another voice from the sky: "Now you are really dead.

Policeman: Say, what's your name?

prisoner: "My name is Jackie Chan.

Policeman: "Why don't you call Zhen Chen? Put your attitude right ~ Tell me your name ~?

Prisoner: My name is Zhen Chen.

When Mr. Wang's son was in the third grade of primary school, one day he failed to teach mathematics repeatedly, and

he was scolded by his impatient mother.

Mr. Wang was outside the study, and heard that his son was scolded badly.

I thought I would comfort him after his son was scolded, so as not to leave a shadow of being scolded in his little mind.

After being scolded, my son came out of the study with a broken face.

To understand his feelings after being scolded, Mr. Wang first asked him, "How do you feel when your mother scolded you?"

I saw my son look at him with sad eyes and say,

"Why did you marry her?

Two foreigners went shopping in Carrefour. When checking out, the clerk asked, "Can you speak chinese?

Two foreigners replied in Mandarin: If you speak slowly, we can understand!

the clerk said, "Can...you...speak...chinese?

A naughty pupil was reading cartoons in a comic book shop. Suddenly, a middle-aged mother shouted in the street, "Xiaoming, you son of a bitch are still fooling around. If I catch you, you will be dead." I saw this pupil throw away his cartoons and run away ... for about 5 meters, panting, saying, "Why did I run away?" I'm not Xiaoming. "