What are some funny World War II or military jokes?

1. In the middle of World War II, in central Africa, more than 500 Italian soldiers were ordered to defend a field airport. They have solid concrete and plenty of ammunition, and even got the powerful 88 guns and plenty of ammunition supported by two Germans. There are only more than 400 British troops on the attacking side, and there are not even decent heavy weapons. The British commander basically gave up hope for this attack and even made a retreat plan. But strangely, just after the attack began, the Italians gave up their resistance and put up a white flag. When asked why the Italian officer who accepted the surrender surrendered, the other side said angrily, "We don't have a crowbar, and we can't open those damn ammunition boxes!" "

The combined forces of the United States and Australia with 65,438+05,000 people attacked the islands occupied by Japan. After preparing for the shelling for two hours, the United States and Australia landed and lost 25 soldiers in the battle, and then completely controlled the island. Of course, if there are Japanese defenders on the island, the number of casualties should increase.

3. In the famous "Wolf Pack" operation, a German U-shaped submarine crashed into an allied transport ship, which was full of munitions and de-tona-tor. After being hit, there was a big explosion, and all kinds of things were blown all over the sky. The excited captain of the German U-shaped submarine ordered the submarine to float to watch his own achievements. Unfortunately, an M4 Sherman tank that was blown to the sky just fell and sank the submarine ... This submarine became the world.

4. When the Allied forces landed in Normandy, the commander of a German ace tank battalion, who had almost no defeat in the European battlefield, might be carried away and directly lead his men and the newly equipped new powerful tiger tanks to open a beach on the Shanghai side and launch an attack on the Allied warships. His courage is extremely commendable! But it's a pity that they only fired one round of shells, and the * * on the Allied 30,000-ton battleship directly blew these new tanks back to the state of parts.

In a glued port, the Germans lay mines every Monday. Three. I come to mine on Friday, and the British minesweeper goes to mine every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. This lasted for a long time, until one day the British commander neglected the routine mine-clearing operation because of other things. The German minesweeper that came to mine the next day was sunk by the mine laid by himself the day before yesterday ... When the British rescued the German officer who fell into the water, the other party was very angry and asked the British officer: "As a mine-clearing force, how can you be so irresponsible?" This is absolutely not allowed in our army! "The gentleman British people have been very sorry about this, so they have been treating these rescued Germans well until the end of the war and sending them back to China.

6. During the Anti-Japanese War, a unit in Li Zongren had a newly enlisted Shandong soldier. While Shandong soldiers were sleeping, their companions put away their guns. When he woke up, he found that the gun was gone. At that time, he lost and shot his head. He was scared out in a cold sweat, so he didn't tell anyone, so he took three grenades directly. When he was in the dark, he touched the position of the Japanese devils, just as a group of devils got together to keep warm, so the three grenades directly greeted him to blow up. Then he picked up three rifles and a crooked machine gun and ran back with a box of bullets. In the process of running back, he even shot and killed eight Japanese devils who came to pursue. Later, according to statistics, his private actions killed 23 Japanese devils and seized three 38 rifles and a machine gun. It was a miracle when the morale of the national army was low at that time. Later, this man was awarded the right medal, and some people said that this man was the ancestor of the special forces in China.

7. When the Soviet Union sent troops to Inner Mongolia, a unit of the most elite Kwantung Army of the Japanese army was ordered to defend a fortress. Maybe I played too much at home and got used to the millet and rifles of Tuba Road. It even sent a cavalry regiment of nearly 65,438+10,000 people to sneak attack the Soviet Union, trying to surprise the other side. At that time, the Soviet troops they ambushed were purely mechanized troops. But the so-called bushido spirit still made them pick up sabers and ride Ma Chong to the other side's tanks and armored vehicles ... As a result, this Soviet army later ate horse meat for a month to improve food. ...