Tragic jokes about married men

Sir: Get up, get up. You said you had to get up early for a meeting today.

Smile: don't talk, I'll sleep for a while.

Sir: Get up quickly, or you will be late.

Smile: Don't touch me! I want to sleep! !

Smile: Yes! It's time to be late! Why did you call me! ! !

About washing dishes

Sir: Will you do the dishes later?

Smile: OK.

Sir: Then why didn't it move?

Smile: I have a headache.

Sir: I'm so lazy that you don't have a headache if I don't let you wash the dishes.

Smile: Really! The thought of washing dishes gives me a headache.

About the truth

Smile: Look, how beautiful that girl is.

Sir: What are you looking at?

Smile: What do you mean! Why don't you agree with me!

Sir: It looks good.

Sir: Hey, don't go, why don't you talk to me?

About eating

Smile: I ate half of this plum. It is delicious. I will give you the rest.

Sir: I don't like plums.

Smile: No, you just like it! Don't you like what I eat?

Sir: This fish is delicious. Let's go

Smile: If your dirty chopsticks are touched, who will eat them!

Sir: Then I'd better eat half. I don't hate you. How can you not like me?

Smile: That's right. I don't like you, which means I am cleaner than you. I am cleaner than you. Why don't you like me? !

About divorce

Smile: If we divorce, the house is mine and I want to take my money.

Sir: What about my money?

Smile: Your money is all my money. Huh, how much money you got there?

Smile: Besides, you should give me 80% of your monthly income after the divorce. Well, if you get married again, just give me 60%.

Sir: Wife, I will never divorce you!

About buying clothes

Smile: Does this dress look good?

Sir: It looks good.

Smile: You just perfunctory me and want me to buy it and go home quickly!

Smile: Does that dress look good?

Sir: It doesn't look so good.

Smile: You can't bear to buy it for me!

About doing housework

Sir: Let's divide the housework.

Smile: OK. First of all, men should do dirty work, such as cleaning floors, toilets and tables. ...

Sir: That's right.

Smile: You study science and engineering, and I study liberal arts. You should make charged things, such as washing machines, refrigerators, rice cookers and electric irons. ...

Sir: Never mind!

Smile: the man is outside and the woman is inside. It's up to you to deal with outsiders, such as buying food, paying utilities, and getting newspapers and milk. ...

Sir: OK, OK, then what are you doing?

Smile: Don't worry. There is a lot of smoke in the kitchen, which will ruin your skin. You must cook.

Sir: Tell me what you do.

Smile: I have a lot to do, too. I can accompany you, supervise you, praise you and comfort you. ...

About children

Smile: Let's have a baby.

Sir: OK.

Smile: Do you like our children?

Sir: Yes.

Smile: That won't do! You have to like me alone!

Sir: OK, OK, I like you alone.

Smile: Then why don't you like my children?

Sir: Let's not have children.

About gender equality

Sir: It is said that men and women are equal. Does our family have to be equal?

Smile: OK. You men have bullied women for thousands of years. We will bully you for thousands of years, and then equality is the real equality. Don't worry, after thousands of years, our family will be equal.

About happiness

Smile: Are you happy to marry me?

Sir: I don't think so. How can I be happy when you are unreasonable, don't work and always disturb others?