Humorous stories about the differences between Chinese and western etiquette

a short story about civility and etiquette 1. There is a working lunch at school every noon, and all the teachers eat it together. However, for the safety of students, two teachers are arranged to send students across the street every day, which makes the two teachers have to eat later. One day at noon, many teachers began to eat lunch as usual, and only President Chen sat at the table without moving chopsticks. We thought there was something wrong with him, but he told us a story. The story is probably that people who talk about "Yi Men Chen" pay great attention to "Yi" and "Li", which shocked the emperors at that time. One of the details says: all dogs here know "righteousness" and "courtesy", and there is a legend that "a dog will not eat until it arrives." After listening to this story, everyone remembered that there were two teachers who had not come to dinner to send their students across the street ... From then on, they would wait until everyone was here before opening chopsticks. Civilized etiquette story II. Several junior students walked side by side, talking and laughing. A teacher came in front of them, and they didn't know each other. But when the teacher came to these students, everyone else was still joking. Only one student bowed respectfully and said "Hello, teacher". Of course, the teacher answered "hello" happily, and the other students didn't hum. After the teacher has passed. Some people say that the classmate is a cake, and the teacher he doesn't know bows. Some people say that he is simply pretending to show others. That classmate didn't refute them, but said: being a polite person is the most basic requirement for being a student. I was walking behind them, and I was very moved by this sentence, and I was moved by the sincerity of that classmate. Being polite is really a rare quality. Civilized etiquette story III. It can be said that it was just an action. On that day, a teacher saw a popsicle wrapping paper, bent down and picked it up and threw it into the trash can. This is an unremarkable action, but his behavior of setting an example and being a teacher teaches us that he is a teacher. If some students see the teacher's practice, how can they not admire him? Maybe he will do the same next time, and he will understand that littering is uncivilized. Through these little things, I have more realized that the meaning of "etiquette" is expressed from one little thing, a manifestation of spiritual beauty and a standard for a person to be a man. We should turn society into a civilized and pollution-free paradise. Still the same truth: starting from me, only you, me and him "starting from me" will be full of etiquette "flavor" everywhere, and will make you, me and him become a real person. One day, I picked up my two-year-old son from kindergarten and went home. The child was bored sitting in the back seat of a bicycle, so I said, "Hey, son, I'll make a word. Can you make a sentence for my father?" "Yes, you go ahead," he said. "Delicious," I said. "delicious fart!" He blurted out after my voice? Speed A man was constipated when he went to the toilet. Suddenly he saw a man rushing in, and it was stormy in an instant. "Dude, I really envy you, so fast." "I envy you, I didn't take off my pants." Not betraying his wife One night, the husband came back from dinner and happily said to his wife, "Today, the manager of our company invited some employees to dinner, and everyone drank heartily. During the dinner, the manager took out three bottles of whisky and said to everyone,' Everyone here, who has never betrayed his wife in his life, these three bottles of wine are all his, and none of them raised their hands. Do you think it is strange? "The wife asked curiously," Then why don't you raise your hand? " The husband said in a panic, "You know, I always prefer beer to whisky." Learning and money father and son saw a very luxurious imported car. Son: People who ride this kind of car must have no knowledge in their stomachs! Father: People who say such things must have no money in their pockets! Silent after dinner, mother and daughter wash dishes together in the kitchen. Father and son are watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a sound of breaking dishes in the kitchen, and then there was silence. Son: Mom must have broken it! Father: How do you know? Son: She didn't swear! Both Chinese and foreign students are primary school students, but their future wish is to be clowns. Miss China: No ambition! You can't teach a boy! Foreign teacher: May you bring laughter to the whole world! The feeling of crossing the wife is cooking in the kitchen. The husband caught one beside her: slow down and be careful! The fire is too big. . . . Hurry up and turn it around, there is too much oil! Wife: I know how to cook. Husband: I just want to let you know how I feel when you are chattering around while I am driving. . . . A bus without a driver A bus full of passengers was moving fast down the hill, and a man was chasing the bus closely behind. A passenger stuck his head out of the window and the person chasing the car said, dude! Forget it! You can't catch up! The man replied, I must catch up with it. I am the driver of this car! ! New neighbor A: The new neighbor is so hateful that he came knocking at my door in the middle of the night last night. B: Did you call the police immediately? A: No. I think they are crazy and continue to play my trumpet. Zhang San, who hit the pig, was driving on a mountain path. Just as he was enjoying the beautiful scenery leisurely, the truck driver who came face to face suddenly rolled down the window and shouted: Pig! The angrier Zhang March thought, he rolled down the window and shouted, You are the pig! Just after scolding, he ran head-on into a group of pigs crossing the road! Father and son boy: Is it true that fathers always know more than sons? Father: Of course! Little boy: Who invented the electric light? Father: Edison! Little boy: Then why didn't Edison's father invent the electric light? Whose problem? Three engineers went out in a car together, and the car broke down on the way. The mechanical engineer asked: Is there something wrong with the engine? The electrical engineer asked: Is there a problem with the circuit? The computer engineer said, let's go out first and then come in to see if it will get better. Get in the way of the coach: There are two things that prevent you from becoming a good football player. Player: What is it? Coach: Your left foot and right foot. In order to punish a group of disobedient students, the teacher made a pair for the students to be right, and they were not allowed to go home if they couldn't. The teacher said, "It doesn't rain when it snows, but it turns into rain when it hits the ground. It's more troublesome when it turns into rain, so it might as well rain at the beginning.". A student said to him, "Sir, if you don't eat shit when you eat, it will turn into shit when you eat. It's much trouble when you eat shit. It's better to eat shit at the beginning."