Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - What are the common cliches in officialdom?
What are the common cliches in officialdom?
I am a civil servant.
At first, this sentence was not a lie. Originally it was a will and advocacy, and bureaucrats themselves didn't know when they lost their will and left advocacy in their mouths. The most accurate explanation of public servant is the public servant, and its meaning will not be disputed. According to the present situation, twelve out of ten people dare not recognize themselves as masters; One thousand out of a hundred bureaucrats don't consider themselves servants. More often, on the contrary. The lie is that whenever bureaucrats say this word, it is not only uncomfortable, but more importantly, the listener wants to cry or vomit, and it is also an unnatural smile to laugh.
People are our parents.
More famous than this famous saying is the maxim that I am the son of China people. Many famous bureaucrats have used it. Other bureaucrats did not dare to overstep their authority because of their humble position, so they changed their packaging. They mean the same thing. His son knows what he thinks. No matter how bold he is, he dares to recognize a thief as his father at most, and never dares to accept a bureaucrat as his son. What's more, 99.99% people in the world don't know when they have such a son. The lie is that, for fear that others will not believe it, the word "food and clothing" is added to facilitate the round support. Its implied meaning is that parents and men are separated by half a paper.
Next, I will say a few words briefly.
Smile happily, but there's no need to laugh. At this time, ten out of ten bureaucrats regard forty or fifty as1; Twelve out of twelve people think nonsense is a simple nickname. But most of these hardships are eaten by small and medium-sized bureaucrats in officialdom, and those who can't reach them generally can't eat them. Only primary school students will take this lie seriously. The most frequent one is 796 sentences, almost 400 sentences. But bureaucrats really think that they have only said two sentences, and more often they think that two sentences are not enough.
Fourth, I represent.
Most of the time I saw a person, but more often I saw a group of people or didn't want to go. I used a piece of paper to explain that I went. According to the survey, before saying this sentence, there will basically be no events entrusted by institutions or people, but he feels that he is qualified or capable of saying this, and no institutions or people will participate in refutation after saying it. As a result, he represents nothing, not even himself. He simply took people as symbols, symbols as gifts, and brought them back completely.
We won't wrong a good man, but we won't let a bad man go.
It is really hard to count the good people who have been wronged, but the bad people who have been spared are batch after batch. Bureaucrats know the exact figures better than ordinary people. In fact, the authority is in your hands, and we are afraid that the bureaucrats will reverse the good and the bad, forming a situation in which we will not wronged the bad guys and we will never let the good guys go. The people are good enough and kind enough, but more than 90% of the grievances are on them. This lie lies in arbitrarily editing the meanings of good words and bad words in the dictionary.
I assure you with party spirit and personality.
Both have had things, but not many bureaucrats have always regarded these two things as existing things. Talk about personality. The living have been sold by bureaucrats to big bureaucrats hundreds of times, and sovereignty has long belonged to them. What do you promise if it's not your own? Are you trying to make fun of those big bureaucrats? Think that the personality of a big bureaucrat can be your own personality? But have you ever wondered where the personality of a big bureaucrat lies? You can't guarantee what you don't have This is the principle.
Let me know if you have any difficulties.
No, no, thanks for your concern. What else can I say? What's the difference between talking and farting at this time? Don't you have eyes? Have you no brains? You are right next to me. I need not mention it. Some sociologists translated this famous saying into the Three Kingdoms, and turned around and translated it back to their own country, which is the following sentence: Shut your mouth. Everyone can try.
Eight organizations know you.
This is a half-sentence, flip-flop lie, mainly aimed at bureaucrats. The so-called half sentence means that there is something left behind; The so-called flip is to make you understand the meaning completely wrong. When most stupid bureaucrats hear this, their stomachs are warm and their resentment is less. The truth is, I knew you were a worthless fool with no background, strength and filial piety. The lie is a hasty addition of the word organization.
Nine, we must.
What words can be added at the back? You can't go wrong as long as you know a few Chinese characters from China. Of course, you can't read sentences, or the bureaucrats will laugh at you. We often hear what we must achieve, what we must achieve, what we must deal with, what we must do and who we must be. Wait a minute. The lie lies in two points: one is to use the wrong subject on purpose, and the other is to use adverbs less. That is, we should be you, whether we should or not.
You don't believe everything the top ten leaders say?
Even bureaucrats lie? Or are bureaucrats lying? Yes, yes, that's great. There is a special explanation that bureaucrats are the best liars in the world, and all liars come from bureaucrats. Some officials tried to trick the sun into becoming a satellite of the earth. Don't think it's nonsense. Some bureaucrats are doing this. Most of the 5,000-year history is fabricated by bureaucrats. Why don't you believe that bureaucrats can fabricate another 5,000-year history for you? You believe all the big ones, but you should believe the little ones more.
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