The funniest joke between teachers and students

1 scenery: a lecture table, three sets of tables and chairs.

Characters: teacher, student Yang Erya, student Li, student Bonny.

Chen Sing: Hello everyone, I am very happy today ... (Take a seat on the stage)

Li Sang: The sun shines in the sky, and the flowers smile at each other. ...

Yang said: last night, the west wind withered the green trees, just downstairs, and there was no way to study.

When ... (Who is it? ) may

Yang: Hey, big news, big news! Ban Ren is angry with me again, and our class has changed to a new one! I heard that the surname is Hou.

Chen; Well, a "sheep" just left and a "monkey" came.

Li: Who cares about monkeys? Even if the Monkey King comes, we have to take him back to Huaguoshan.

Yang: OK! If you don't loosen your teeth, you will be rooted in the chaotic class. A thousand words persuade the right thoughts, and whoever comes will be angry. Yeah!

Teacher; : enter the classroom "class!"

Chen: Get up and stand up.

Teacher: Hello, class. Please sit down. First, let me introduce myself. I am your new class teacher. My surname is Hou.

Student: "Monkey"? (Ha ... Hey ...)

Teacher: Be quiet. Let's ask the students to introduce themselves.

Yang: Teacher, her name is Bonnie and her name is Li.

Chen and Li: Her name is Yang Erya.

Teacher; Don't students know who they are? Ask someone to introduce you. Ok, shall I announce the results of the monthly exam? Yang erya 76,

Li 67, Bonnie 49.

Chen: Ah! We're going to fry shredded pork with bamboo boards again tonight.

Yang and Li: What do you mean?

Chen: Don't you know? Every time I come home from the exam, the score below 80 is women's singles, the score below 70 is men's singles, and the score below 60 is mixed.

Double, please I'm dead this time.

Teacher: Stop it and carefully analyze the reasons why you didn't do well in the exam. Write me a written reflection, and your feelings must be very profound.

Teacher: OK, why don't you read the reflection for everyone?

Li: What do you know about spring flowers and autumn moons? When is the exam? At present, the test papers are re-issued, and the results are unbearable. I'm still scared about last time. This is just a theme.

Change. When will you stand out? Like a river flowing eastward.

Chen sang: Who cares, how bitter my heart is, who cares, where I will go tomorrow, how bad my grades are, how many dirty eyes I have received, and how bitter my skin is. in fact

My heart hurts more than anyone else.

Yang: When can I get a high score? I have nothing to ask the sky. I wonder if I will go to college tomorrow. Will the exam be strict? I want to be strong. Smell the chicken in the third watch the chicken in the fifth watch.

Unfortunately, life is dull and wisdom is incomplete. Sighing books and the sea, I should hate it, too. Who says I am not strong-willed, the moon is full of rain and shine, and life has advantages and disadvantages?

It is difficult to go to the sky. This is an old question. I hope that after hard work, it will be named before Sun Shan.

Teacher: You complained before I complained. Hey!

Sing: I don't know, why? Students are not what I imagined, or they can't find the direction of education, let alone full of hope. Standing in the classroom,

Tears poured down my heart and I didn't know where to go.

Student: wink at jokes.

The bell rings ...

Student: The first battle was successful, yeah! Go home!

Teacher: In the dead of night, when I am upset, I don't sleep when I am upset. My mind is full of students. (Say:) No! This gang

This little guy seems to be aiming at me on purpose. It doesn't seem enough in my eyes. Hey! By the way, now the new curriculum reform, to optimize the relationship between teachers and students, huh!

Let's get started.

Yang: Hey, who cleaned the floor so clean? Well, there's a new tablecloth, yo, and a chair cushion.

Teacher; Start class. Today we are going to learn the calculation of parallelogram area. Look, I have two identical trapezoids in my hand.

Now I put the speakers together. What do you see?

Student: Whispering to each other and doing little tricks.

The teacher sang: Look at the other students. Look at me. I'm doing well here. Take a look first.

Student: I look left and right, up and down, but I just don't understand. Start (a disease) ...

Teacher: Hey! Is there nothing we can do? Shall we call it a day?

Chen: No, no, Li and Zhang Jiagen had a fight. My head is broken. Why don't you go and have a look? And: Go ahead.

Teacher: Wait for me at the door. Don't go, just study in the classroom. Leave it to me.

Chen: Li is miserable this time. His family is so poor, how much should the medical expenses be?

Yang: Will the teacher fire him? Will you tell her mother? Her mother is ill.

Chen: Maybe, this teacher is quite fierce.

And: let's pray for him.

Chen Sing: I pray for Li Neng's safe return. Although she was injured, it would be nice to come back.

Yang Sang: I pray that the teacher will be lenient and never fire me.

Li: I walked into the classroom with gauze wrapped in my head.

Teacher: You look calm. It's okay. I'll get my exercise book and get ready for class.

Yang and Chen: Hey, how's it going?

Li: You're welcome. When the teacher arrived at the hospital, he didn't say anything. He helped me find a doctor before and after running, and paid the medical expenses without saying a word. see

My head is bleeding and the teacher is crying like a crybaby. Is it unkind of us to treat him like this? The teacher is a bully to us.

Student: We all misjudged her.

Teacher: Class!

Student: Hello, teacher!

Teacher: Stupid.

Li Sang: Sorry, sir. It's not that I don't love you. I really don't want to make you sad.

Students sing: I'm sorry, teacher. I didn't embarrass you. I really don't want to make you angry.

The teacher sang: it doesn't matter, it really doesn't matter. At least you have realized your mistake. You don't have to torture yourself sadly, and you don't need too much commitment. only

It is enough for me to ask you to study hard. A person's life has many memories. It will be sweet to think of you.

Teacher: Today, we are going to learn a short poem, a love poem.

Teacher: Love is a mountain spring.

Yang: How many dry hearts have you nourished?

Teacher: Love is rain and dew.

Li: How many happy families have you given birth to?

Teacher: Love is spring breeze.

Chen: Drive away the cold in winter.

Teacher: Love is a lighthouse.

Yang: Let the distance between heart and heart be no longer far away.

Teacher: Extend your heart.

Student: Stick out my heart.

Teacher: With our hearts.

Student: With our love.

Dedicated to: Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow.

Campus humor drama-boys' dormitory series 507.

The teacher lives in the dormitory tonight.

People in this issue: Master of One Room, Gong, Pang San, and Teacher Chen.

Director: The teacher lives in the dormitory tonight!

Gong: Which teacher? Man or woman?

Head teacher: You said our head teacher is a man and a woman?

Gong: It's hard to say!

Pang San: For the record, I won't squeeze with him. I have to squeeze myself to lose weight!

Gong: Come on! Your bloated figure is not enough to sleep in that bed alone!

Head teacher: Wang Cheng has a holiday tonight, and Teacher Chen sleeps at his place!

Fat three: fortunately, I didn't sleep in the upper bunk, otherwise I would definitely collapse!

Gong Xi: Pang San, try to get rid of your smelly feet!

Pang San: How to solve it? It's been over ten years!

Gong: That's not easy. Find a beauty shop.

Pang San: I still spend money on beauty with my broken feet?

Gong: Who told you to open a beauty salon? Find a beauty salon and borrow a saw. Click click!

Colonel: Pang San, put on your shoes, so it won't stink!

Gong: That's a good idea!

Pang San: Stop talking about me. You snore so loudly, why don't you find a piece of tape to seal it!

Director: What tape! Come on, put on your mask!

Palace: Mask? Prevent SARS! Colonel, just talk about us. You sleep in Mr. Chen's upper bunk. Don't be urinary incontinence at night and choke on Mr. Chen! Keep this mask as a diaper!

Director: OK, OK! Stop joking, Gong. You'd better put on this mask.

Pang San: Yes! Don't affect the "house appearance"! I am wearing my shoes!

Head teacher: It is also important to be polite to the teacher.

Pang San: Yes, sir! Teacher Chen, we still know how to respect!

Gong: Yes, actually, Mr. Chen is very good! Just a little fat!

Pang San: I've gained a lot of weight! I heard that he wanted to ride a horse to lose weight, but after a month, he didn't lose a pound of meat! The horse has lost dozens of pounds!

Gong Xi: Pang San, you don't want pot calling the kettle black!

Pang San: What's wrong with me? I didn't say fat is bad!

Gong: There is nothing wrong with being fat! What a waste of cloth! As far as your shorts are concerned, you can directly make a dress for the head of delegation!

Head: Just put on a dress!

Gong: Let me make an analogy! How about a miniskirt without a skirt!

Pang San: Hey! No matter how fat you are, you are fatter than Teacher Chen! At least I can enter the hula hoop!

Head: What hula hoop?

Pang San: I heard that Teacher Chen heard that shaking the hula hoop can lose weight, so she bought one, but it couldn't fit in! hahaha

Fat three laughed wildly, and everyone else stopped laughing! Behind Pang San is the new teacher Chen! Pang San didn't find it.

Pang San: Later, he finally got it in and couldn't get it out! hahaha ...

Director and Gong: Teacher Chen.

Pang San: Yes, it's Teacher Chen! ^^^

Teacher Chen: Did he take it out later?

Pang San: No, I heard that he also used a hula hoop as a belt, hahaha (I felt something was wrong and turned around slowly, and my laughter turned into a burp when I was surprised). Who says Mr. Chen is fat! Look at this waist ... Miss Chen, where is your waist?

Gong: Miss Chen, there you are. Please sit down! (Move the stool behind Pang San)

Teacher Chen: OK, OK, sit down! (pretending to be fat three's head in distress) Your boy is quite good at making it up! It's a pity not to go to politics in Taiwan Province Province!

Pang San sat down awkwardly touching his head, failed and fell to the ground.

Teacher Chen: Get up, are you all right?

Pang San: Nothing, just a fracture.

Head: (Reaching out to make him fat three times) Which bone is broken?

Fat three: fart "shares"! (Grab Gong's hand and get up)

Everyone laughed.

Gong: Why did Teacher Chen come to sleep in our dormitory today?

Miss Chen: Oh, I'm preparing some materials. If you are late, you can't go back! What do you usually do in the dormitory?

Gong Xi: (exaggerated and serious) study! Very hard! Now the task of young people is very heavy! Busy!

Pang San: Yes! Gong Xike is busy! It's like hooking up with a girl

Gong: Fat man! Miss Chen, don't get me wrong! I mean that fat bastard!

Teacher Chen: Nothing! Ha ha! Just fat! This person will gain weight easily if he doesn't exercise! I'm afraid I won't be able to move again!

Gong: Yes! As the saying goes, people are afraid of famous pigs and fat. I mean, people are afraid of being famous, and Teacher Chen is afraid of being fat!

Teacher Chen: Give me the pig? Ha ha. Ok, it's time to go to bed, study hard and have a casual rest! Sleep!

Three people: Yes, sir!

Director: Mr. Chen, you sleep in Wang Cheng's bed. Here it is!

Everyone went back to the store and lay down to sleep. After a while, Gong sat up and sniffed hard, and so did the head of the room.

Chief: You smell it too!

Gong: Well, I'm almost out of oxygen! Fat three, fat three!

Pang San: Why? You want me to accompany you to the bathroom again! I'm not going!

Head: Shh! Your feet stink!

Pang San: No? I put on my shoes!

Head: Could it be that your shoes are broken and your athlete's foot is leaking!

Gong: Wait! It doesn't smell like fat three's feet. Pang San's feet smell like stale tomatoes. Smells like stale tomatoes with a little stinky tofu!

Pang San: I found the source of the poison gas. It's teacher Chen's!

Gong and the head of the ward got out of bed and came to Mr. Chen's bed.

Teacher Chen: Ah (wake up)? Why don't you go to bed? !

Gong: We-we help Miss Chen catch mosquitoes!

Pang San: Nonsense! Mosquitoes have long been smoked away by the foot odor here!

And director Gong Bai gave him a look.

Miss Chen: Oh! (embarrassed) I'm a little sweaty.

Pang San: Teacher Chen! Put on your shoes! It doesn't stink when put on!

Teacher Chen: Oh, it affects everyone, hehe, I'll play it! Everybody go to bed!

Head: Nothing, nothing, Miss Chen! We get used to it when we smell it!

Gong Xi pats Pang San.

Miss Chen: Put it on, it won't matter! Why don't you get up tomorrow and store your clothes? Go to sleep!

Three people: alas!

Teacher Chen: (seeing Gong wearing a mask on his ear) Gong, why do you wear a mask when you sleep?

Gong: Oh, fight SARS! Prevent SARS!

Teacher Chen: Isn't SARS long gone?

Gong: In my dream! I had a dream in Vietnam the day before yesterday, where SARS was prevalent!

Teacher Chen: Tell me the truth, what's going on?

Head: Mr. Chen, Gong snores in bed for fear of affecting you.

Teacher Chen: Hey! What should I do? It's okay, take it off! My wife also likes snoring. She has been used to it for more than ten years. You can't sleep if you can't hear it now!

Pang San: So are we! I missed Gong's snoring just now!

Gong: I'm flattered! Thank you for your encouragement! I will try to catch up with Jenny's level!

Teacher Chen: OK, go to sleep!

Everyone went back to bed. After a while, he snored like thunder, and Pang San tossed and turned, covering his ears.

Pang San: This dead palace Xi! I want to find a pair of smelly socks to gag him!

Gong: Don't you dare!

Pang San: You are still snoring when you are not asleep!

Gong: Who is snoring? I was awakened!

Fat three: it makes people endocrine disorders!

Colonel: Didn't you say you missed it because you couldn't hear snoring?

Pang San: But the frequency of snoring is different! I'm used to the rhythm of Gong, but I can't get used to it for a while! (Get up and run to Miss Chen's bedside and listen to her mouth. Teacher Chen suddenly snorted, and Pang San took two steps back! ) scared me to death, it's teacher Chen again!

Gong: No wonder he is not afraid of my snoring! Whose snoring can drown his manners!

Pang San knocked on Mr. Chen's bed, and then Mr. Chen snored. Pang San clapped twice, and then Mr. Chen snored twice. Pang San picked up the toothbrush and knocked on the cup continuously, and then Mr. Chen snored continuously. Pang San turned on the radio again, and Mr Sang Chen followed!

Gong: Don't wake yourself up!

Colonel: Forget it, just consider it FM! Sleep! Pang San, what are you doing?

Pang San crept to Mr. Chen's bed.

Pang San: I put a mask on him!

Teacher Chen snored loudly and turned over.

Gong: He really woke himself up.

Pang San hurried back to bed, and the three pretended to sleep.

Teacher Chen woke up slowly and found that the mask on his mouth seemed to understand something. He smiled and got up to help the students tuck in, and then put on a mask. Turn off the lights. Gong Kui and Pang San got out of bed to help Mr. Chen take off his shoes, mask and quilt. Then the three men smiled at each other and went back to bed. The head teacher turned off the light, turned off the light.