Do you have the best humorous jokes? If so, give some. Thank you!

I have two shortcomings: sleepwalking naked 1: my advantages are: handsome; But my shortcoming is that I am not handsome.

I won't go to work until the sun comes out; If I come out, I'll go back to sleep!

3: Snails run wildly.

4: I watch Forbes Rich List every morning when I get up. If my name is not on it, I will go to work.

5. Talking about money doesn't hurt feelings, but talking about feelings hurts money the most.

6: I curse you for buying instant noodles all your life without seasoning packets.

7: Although you wear cologne, I can still vaguely smell the scum.

8. The house is rotten and the future is uncertain.

9. The most mysterious department in history: related departments.

10: Undeniably, mosaic is the biggest obstacle to the progress of human nude art in this century!

1 1: There are only two things I can't do in my life: this can't be done and that can't be done.

12: People have backgrounds, and I have backgrounds.

13: White Horse … Where did you die! Did you lose your prince and dare not come to see me?

14: I am an angel, and I can't go back to heaven because of my weight.

15: There are too many liars and obviously not enough fools.

16: I smiled at the sky from the horizontal knife, and then I went to sleep.

17: Your mobile phone is cheaper than the phone bill.

18: It's a long way, but this is Xiu Yuan. Let's take a taxi.

19: My life has two sides, A and B, and yours has two sides, S and B. ..

20: I am not afraid of stealing tools, but I am afraid of stealing children to understand technology!

2 1: Failure is not terrible, but success is the key.

22: If you have time to learn Feng Shui and occupy a good tomb after your death, you can make up for the regret that you can't afford a good house before your death.

23: Ming Sao is easy to hide and hard to prevent.

24: When the day turns into night in bed again, the sun is born …

25: successful people are all-on the way to Niu B, they have an erection all the way.

26: Women remember: Be sure to eat well, play well, sleep well and drink well. Once exhausted, other women spend our money, live in our rooms, sleep with our husbands, pick up our boyfriends and beat our babies.

27: I remember one day shortly after graduation, my girlfriend sent me a short message: "Let's break up!"

Before I could feel sad, my girlfriend sent another message: "Sorry, I sent it wrong."

You can be completely sad now.

28: I know I'm not a handsome guy, but someone saw my full moon photo and said my left nostril was idolized.

29: Being single is very painful. Being single for a long time is more painful. I saw a sow the other day, and everyone thought it had good eyes. ...

30: To deal with a vicious person, you must be more vicious than him; Dealing with a despicable person is more despicable than him;

3 1: When dealing with handsome people, you must be more handsome than him; To deal with a handsome man, you must ... ruin his face!

32: Menstrual blood is the uterus crying for loneliness, and wet dream is the seminal vesicle crying for depression. Menstruation once a month, but wet dream is uncertain, which just shows that men don't flick when they have tears. ...

33: What? Navy SEALs? ... is it ... as good as our urban management?

34: Without lover's flavor, how can there be human touch?

35: The kid next door finally vowed to lose weight-at the graduation job fair, someone said to him, "Sorry, buddy, you blocked my cell phone signal."

I allow you to come into my world, but I will never allow you to walk around in my world.

37: Reluctant to let the children catch wolves, reluctant to let the daughter-in-law catch hooligans, reluctant to update the collection. ...

38: You think I am a three-year-old child. I am only two and a half years old! 1. Why does the silkworm baby have money? = => Because it will cocoon (frugal)

2. Why didn't the white rabbit marry the zebra? = => Because mother rabbit says tattoos are not good children.

3. When will X be unified? = => When buying instant noodles (unified instant noodles)

4. What line does the monkey dislike? = => parallel lines (because they don't intersect)

5. Chocolate and tomatoes fight. Why does chocolate win? = => Because of chocolate bars.

6. What happens when sharks eat mung beans? = => turned into green bean paste.

7. After the match burned, it went to the hospital. What has it become? = => Cotton swab

8. How did Lin Daiyu die? = => Fall to death (a sister Lin fell from the sky)

9. A pig smashed a dish after saying "Come on"? = => Chocolate

10. The potato stabbed the steamed stuffed bun with a deadly knife. What happened? = => has become a bean paste (killing) bag.

1 1. What animals like to stick on the wall? = => Seal (newspaper)

12. Why do foxes often fall down? = => Because foxes are cunning (slippery)

13.4 people are playing mahjong in the house. Why did the police come and take away five people = => Because the people they played were called "Mahjong".

14. When do you like soda? = => When you are lonely (when you are lonely, you will want soda)

15. An egg goes to the teahouse for tea. What happened afterwards? = => It turned out to be a tea egg.

16. There is a male deer. He walks faster and faster. What happened in the end? = => It became an expressway.

17. One day Mung Bean committed suicide and jumped from the fifth floor, bleeding a lot. What happened? = => has become a red bean.

18. Why didn't the plane hit the stars when it was flying so high? = => Because the stars will twinkle.

19. Corn wanted to pursue fashion and got a perm. What was the result? = => turned into popcorn.

20. What mouse walks on two feet? = => Mickey Mouse

2 1. What duck walks on two feet? = => All ducks walk on two legs.

22. Miss, business is not good now. Why? = => Highly pathogenic avian influenza (HPAI)

23. What kind of people can't work in a gas station? = => A smooth talker (oil gun slips)

24. Is jiaozi a boy or a girl? = => Boys because jiaozi has a foreskin.

25. The man in gold = => A surprised teacher asked Xiaoming, "1+ 1=?" Xiao Ming said, "I don't know." The teacher told him to go home and ask his parents. Xiaoming goes to ask his mother first. Her mother is very sad. She called him "mental derangement" and Xiao Ming asked his brother who was watching TV, "Black cat boss." Xiaoming went to ask his father again. Dad was eating a popsicle and said, "Great." Xiao Ming went to ask his sister in love again, "Dear, I will wait for you outside." Xiao Ming went to ask his sister again, and her sister kept saying, "Good rabbit, open the door."

The next day, the teacher asked Xiao Ming 1+ 1=? Xiao Ming replied first: "mental derangement!" " The teacher asked, "Who told you that?" "Black cat boss." The teacher gave him a slap without saying anything. Xiao Ming replied, "Great." "Xiao Ming, come to my office after class!" "Honey, I'll wait for you outside." The teacher locked him in the office, and he replied, "bunny, please open the door." ......