I want a joke. Please give me some good jokes. I am useful.

Joke: A reporter interviewed 100 penguins. What do they do all day? The first one said: Eat and sleep to fight peas, and the second one said: Eat and sleep to fight peas. I have been asking 99 of them. When I asked100th, I said: Eat and sleep. The reporter asked: Why not fight peas? Penguin said: I'm fucking peas, your grandmother. More than 60 years ago, a friend told me a joke and made me laugh. Later, I was admitted to the hospital because my stomach hurt too much. Before the doctor operated on me, he asked me why I smiled like this, so I told him. He laughed hysterically and finally died laughing. I was taken to court. The judge asked me to tell a joke, and the jury decided whether it met the factual elements of manslaughter. I want to sign an exemption contract. The judge announced that the court would be adjourned and reopened a day later, and announced that he would accept my opinion. So, I told this joke in court, and as a result, some people knocked on the table with a smile and some people rolled on the ground with a smile. Later, everyone who heard the joke that day died laughing. I became a celebrity in an instant, and reporters from all walks of life asked to interview me. I know that telling this joke may constitute public infringement, so I vaguely said something to the camera to the effect that "the reason is always a lie, and the belief is always masturbation." After the program was broadcast, it caused great repercussions. Unexpectedly, one day, some mysterious plain clothes broke into my bedroom and dragged me into a dark room. After a long time, a strong light shone on my face. I barely opened my eyes and was shocked. The man sitting in front of me is the only person as famous as me-the president. The president roughly explained the purpose of arresting me, which was simple: record this joke and send it to the dictator of a hostile country in the Middle East, laughing him to death. I had to agree to his request, and at the same time put forward that this joke belongs to weapons of mass destruction and should not be aimed at civilians. The president agreed. Two weeks later, the president announced that he had mastered the key technology of the joke and successfully tested it in the desert area. This caused an uproar in the international community, and many countries panicked. International military scientists named it "Laughing Deterrence". At this moment, some eastern country suddenly announced that it had mastered this joke, and the buddy who told me this joke had taken refuge in that country. Thus, a "balance between laughter and deterrence" has been formed between us. Three years later, on April 1 day, what I was worried about all day finally happened: a terrorist organization in the Middle East stole the original technology of that joke. As a result, civilization has been destroyed as never before, and governments all over the world are in constant fear. The United Nations had to hold a global summit and finally designated April 1 day as April Fool's Day. More than 60 years have passed, and I am dying. Before leaving this world, as a historical witness, I feel it necessary to tell this joke to everyone. My friend told me this joke the other day. It was very simple and brief. Just one sentence: rtrt t answer time 2007-06-27 19: 14 report other answers. There is a little white cat and a little black cat walking together. There is a pit in front of it. The little black cat fell in and pulled it out ... when the little black cat looked back. ...