Classic humorous jokes

A complete collection of classic humorous jokes

"Duanzi" is originally an artistic term in cross talk, which refers to a section or a section of artistic content in cross talk works. The connotation of the word "" has also quietly changed due to its frequent use. People have subjectively integrated it into some unique connotations without realizing it. In addition to its original meaning, the word is also a common name for vocal music programs or literary works. The following is Let’s take a look at the classic humorous jokes I compiled. Classic humorous paragraph 1

1. The rabbit asked the snake: "You swallow everything in one bite, why don't you divide it into smaller pieces?"

The snake said: "You tie your hands to You will know if you try eating later."

2. Ah Dai picked up a lamp in an alley in Beijing. He wiped the lamp and said, "Who threw the lamp here? "

At this time, the Djinn appeared and smiled: "I can grant you a wish, just say it!"

Dumb shouted excitedly: "I want a house. , within the fifth ring.”

The lamp god’s face darkened: “You are too greedy, why should I live in a lamp if I can give you a room?”

3 , Matchmaker: "In addition to being a bit perverted, that young man is also very good at making money."

The girl asked: "Then how much money did he make?"

Matchmaker: "This has to go. Ask him about the girls he's been with!"

4. On the subway, there was a mixed-race Asian beauty sitting across from her. She looked familiar, with big eyes and beautiful legs.

The young man next to her probably also noticed it. He peeked at her from time to time, and finally couldn't help it anymore.

"Miss, have we met there?"

As a result, the beauty became angry, jumped up and shouted: I am not Maria Ozawa. Classic humorous jokes 2

1. Husband: What would you do if you caught me sleeping with someone else? Wife: Turn around and leave. Husband: So tolerant, what next? Wife, I lost my head and fed it to the dog

2. I was here on a business trip today. I felt bored when I stayed in a hotel alone, so I asked the people living next to me to accompany me to fight the landlord. Unexpectedly, both of them were women. The one who said the money will not come, or else he will take off his clothes if he loses. Later, when I was eating instant noodles, I accidentally soiled their clothes, so I gave them the money for the clothes. Comrade policemen, this is really what happened.

3. My son has to be fed at home before he will eat. One day, I was curious and wondered how he would eat in kindergarten. So I went to check it out at noon, and this little guy actually found a girl to feed him! Immediately tears burst down my face, this kid is much more promising than me!

4. On the bus, a little girl said: Mom, Mom, I like small animals very much. I want to keep pets. Mom: Okay, mom will catch two ants for you when we get off the bus. Little girl:...

5. High school uniforms were just issued, and the short-sleeved short-sleeved ones for girls have V-necks and no buttons. The girl next to me said: "It's over. If you bend down to wear this, it will leak." Ah." Then I said, "Don't worry, we boys are not interested in the fat on your belly." Then my screams resounded throughout the classroom.

6. Cherish life and stay away from big girls. A friend of mine went out with a group of girls a few years ago. The girl was bitten by a snake, and her friend used her mouth to take drugs. The girl thanked him and said, "Thank you." He raised his head and said, "You're welcome." Seeing the girl's big smile Breasts, he couldn't help but swallow his saliva... The grass on the grave is now more than one meter high.

7. When I was in my senior year of high school, my mother opposed my puppy love. Once I went to the street with my girlfriend and saw my parents from a distance. I was confused at that time.

The next thing I saw was my dad spinning my mom in a circle and dragging her away! It's going very fast! ! Then Momo stretched out a hand from behind and gave a thumbs up!

8. Early in the morning, on the bus, the software on the mobile phone crisply said: "Hello~ My aunt is going to visit me in three days~" It's so embarrassing...

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9. Today I saw a baby maggot beside the manure pit. It was white, fat, cute and cheerful. I saw it hunched over and crawling towards me. It was so cute!

So I put it in my hands and played with it. The skin was so soft! I picked it up and admired it carefully, and found that there were circles of lines on its body, and a line connected the chrysanthemum and the head. Wow! What a magical animal!

As I looked at it, saliva came out unintentionally, so I put it in my mouth. Wow! An amazing smell that I have never tasted before.

In order to experience the taste longer, I didn’t take a bite. I let the baby maggots swim between the tip of my tongue and my teeth. It rolled and squirmed playfully in my mouth, making me itchy.

Finally I couldn’t help but take a bite, and there was a popping sound as the baby maggot exploded, and a stream of pus rushed across the tip of my tongue. It tastes amazing! I walked out of the hut with a satisfied smile!

10. One day my wife was cooking while my son and I were watching TV.

The two of us argued, and I said: "I like Big Bear, I just like Big Bear!" Suddenly I heard the sound of a spoon being thrown in the kitchen, and my wife came out of the kitchen carrying a kitchen knife. I was still wondering what was going on, but my son continued: "I like Xiong Er." My wife turned around and went back to the kitchen. ;