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What is the real reason why a daughter-in-law doesn't want her mother-in-law to participate in family management?
Therefore, the public defines it as the conflict and disharmony between two women for the love of a man. My mother-in-law will be angry. Doesn't her grandson have the right to education? And the home is my son's, so I'm not qualified to talk? Therefore, there are many feuds between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in life, which eventually leads to the rift between husband and wife. So why is a daughter-in-law so resistant to her mother-in-law's participation in family management, especially to her children's education? If a husband can really understand it, he may become the core of the bridge between the two.
In small family management, the real outsider is actually the mother-in-law.
The most common contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is that mother-in-law treats each other as outsiders, which leads to exclusion and then treats them differently. The mother-in-law thinks that her son, who was raised by herself, married his daughter-in-law, and she has priority. She is also very afraid that another woman will occupy her control over her son. In the arrangement of family members, she will instinctively classify her daughter-in-law as an outsider. If she is excluded, how can the family relationship be harmonious?
Marriage is a cooperative alliance between two adults who appreciate each other and decide to support them for the rest of their lives. However, it is difficult for the mother-in-law to give up the role of taking care of her son for a while, so it may not be a blow at first, but it seems to interfere excessively with the young couple's excessive life. In fact, the real outsider in the operation of a small family is actually the mother-in-law. Only when the subject and object are truly distinguished can there be harmonious communication. Because of the psychology of protecting calves, it can be said that few mother-in-law can do it, so the self-orientation and self-restraint of the role are the important reasons for the harmonious relationship.
Unwilling to let her mother-in-law educate her children actually stems from her dissatisfaction with her products.
Mother-in-law has different qualities because of age difference, education level or family background. Although there are many professors with high knowledge, there will be more little old ladies among ordinary people. What is my mother-in-law's favorite and most common sentence? I brought up my son? Or? I have raised all my children, and they are all well.
Actually, this is the key. Why do you care so much about your mother-in-law contacting her children and participating in her own life? The root of the problem is that women are full of dissatisfaction with their husbands and mother-in-law, all kinds of problems and disgust, different words and deeds, lack of emotional intelligence, and lack of attitude towards human behavior, which leads to such a failed work of art. How can women hope to accept their hopes again? This is a direct result of defective products. Perhaps the metaphor is exaggerated, but almost everyone will care about her mother-in-law's educational intervention, which will be related to her dissatisfaction with her husband.
In addition, some mothers-in-law do have some problems in educating their children. Former colleague Jamlom, because of her mother-in-law's education, would rather work hard than ask her mother-in-law to help with the children. My mother-in-law hasn't been to school for a few days, and she can't speak Mandarin, but she has been teaching her children to read pictures. She will point at the snake to educate her children. Borrow four worms? She will point to the frog and tell the child? Borrow a toad? She will point to the gecko and tell the child? Call it the tiger in the scorpion? She even asked the children to pick up the food that had fallen to the ground and put it in their mouths, teaching them what thrift is.
Sometimes it is difficult to distinguish right from wrong because of the gap between region and literacy, but it is really out of place and it is difficult to live in harmony. Therefore, it is reasonable for women not to want their children to be led by the nose by the wrong age in a subtle way. Especially in the era of mother-in-law, personal vision and the need for good positioning are different. How can a woman hope to return to the backward days before liberation after hard work? Survival and life are different, and the difference between them is different that mother-in-law can't understand.
Therefore, what we really want to make the family harmonious, the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law harmonious, is not to treat each other as one of our own, but to really realize who is the master in different families, to know how to distinguish between the subject and the object, to respect the guests more and to obey the master more, so that the family can be more and more harmonious and the relationship between them can be more and more harmonious.
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