Collecting jokes, high-quality ones

1 Once upon a time, there was a rich man who liked to go to a brothel when he had nothing to do. The brothel he often went to had four floors. When he first went there, he always worked on the first floor.

After the money was almost spent, when he went back to the brothel, his mother arranged for him to go to the second floor. The girl on the second floor was much worse than the girl on the first floor, but she had little money, so he had to make do with it.

Later, when he ran out of money, the brothel mother asked him to go to the third floor. He went up to the room on the third floor and saw a pig there. He thought, since he didn’t spend any money, he could just make a living!

The next day, he went again. The mother of the brothel glared and pointed to the fourth floor.

He went up to the fourth floor and saw many people looking down at the railing in the middle. He took a curious look and said happily: "It's so rare to have sex with a chicken!"

"What's the matter?" said a big man next to him: "Yesterday I saw a man fucking a pig!"

2 Talking about the negotiation between Cao Cao and Liu Bei. Liu Bei sent his most proud general Zhang Fei.

When Cao Cao's sister Cao Yue'e heard that Liu Bei sent Zhang Fei, she volunteered to negotiate on her behalf.

Cao Yue'e and Zhang Fei met. Neither of them was convinced by the other, so they decided to compete and negotiate first. Zhang Fei asked Cao Yue'e what he was comparing to?

Cao Yue'e thought: Zhang Fei is a military general. I will definitely not be able to defeat him in a martial arts competition. Let's just compete in a competition! He said to Zhang Fei, "We are writing, I am making gestures, guess what it means."

After three comparisons, Cao Yuee was so angry that she vomited blood and fainted.

Cao Cao came to see his sister who was carried back and asked Cao Yue'e: "Sister, what are you comparing to each other? You are so smart and are so angry?"

Cao Yue'e said to Cao Cao : "Brother! Don't underestimate that reckless man Zhang Fei! I proposed to compete with him. I first made a cross-chest gesture and said that I had the universe and the earth in mind. As soon as I finished, Zhang Fei didn't After thinking about it, I stretched out my two fingers to show that I was destined to be the king. Then I stretched out my thumbs and said that I was one of my brother's generals. Unexpectedly, Zhang Fei stretched out three fingers and said that he was not as good as them. The three in Taoyuan were sworn friends. In the end, I touched my belly and said that I was full of knowledge. Unexpectedly, he waved his hand and said that he had nothing to do with it." When Zhang Fei returned to the camp, everyone gathered around and asked him. How could Cao Yue'e be so angry that she vomited blood?

Zhang Fei's eyes widened: "That bitch told me she had big breasts when she first came up, and I said mine was longer than hers; she said she had breasts once a night, and I said three times a night. ;Finally she said she was pregnant, and I waved my hand and said--fuck it."

3 There was a family with only a widowed mother and a stupid son. The mother worked hard to provide for her. The silly son proposed a marriage.

On the night of the wedding, the mother was afraid that her stupid son would not know how to get married, so she taught her son in advance: "When you enter the bridal chamber, you will use the place where you pee to bump into the place where your wife urinates." , Got it?

The son said he got it.

The next day, the mother went to ask her son to eat. The son bent over and opened the door with his legs in pain. The mother was surprised. I asked my son what was wrong?

The son said with a sad face, "You didn't teach me to use the place where I pee to bump into the place where my wife urinates, and this is what happened." "

The mother asked her what she had hit. The son pointed to the chamber pot in the room and said, "That's the one. I hit it all night." ”

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