Don't treat abuse as humor.

My husband has a friend, Mr. E, who is not bad by nature, but has a notoriously annoying mouth. When I first met him, I heard his name before I met him. Others introduced him like this: "Mr. E, one of their friends with the worst mouth, talking to him can make people angry."

At that time, I just heard it from people, I didn't know Mr. E very well, and I couldn't talk when I met him occasionally, so I never learned the power of that poisonous mouth. Until recently, because of her husband, I had more contact with Mr. E and began to suffer from it.

As mentioned at the beginning, Mr. E is not bad in nature. He is generous and clever to his friends. Sometimes he talks about things seriously, with a clear head and accurate analysis. He is still a very reasonable person, but the bad thing is that he is seldom serious.

For example, a friend just got married, and on the wedding day, people posted videos or photos of the wedding scene in the circle of friends to express their feelings. Everyone congratulated him, but he commented on "early divorce", and his friend was so happy that his son was full of wine. He commented on The Next Funeral and so on, and he made such comments more than once or twice.

I had a similar experience myself. I just expressed my feelings with my husband in a circle of friends. He immediately commented below: "Go clean early, and I will give you 10,000 fireworks after the divorce" ... The original good mood was broken by his words.

So extreme, is it difficult for Mr. E to resent the person he commented on? On the contrary, all the people he commented on were friends with whom he had a good relationship. Perhaps, in his mind, this kind of joke between friends is more familiar and undisguised. But, sir, this is just your idea. You can say anything if you are familiar with the network, but you can't be outspoken.

Just like another friend, Mr. D, he has uremia and is under great pressure. He seldom appears in chat groups. Everyone knows his situation, and even if we contact him occasionally, he won't speak any irritating language. When Mr. E talks, he always says, "D, why aren't you dead? No treatment. You can't be cured. Give up treatment "or" d, why aren't you in the coffin? " Although Mr. D also teased him with a smile, he quietly withdrew after several responses.

In addition, Mr. E likes to flaunt male chauvinism. He always said in front of his friends, "Your daughter-in-law hasn't stopped, and it's time for a divorce." "This woman hasn't been home for three days." Or he directly reprimanded his friend's wife, "What do you say when a man talks?" "What are you nagging about? One more word to get rid of * * and "What can I do?" As a woman, no matter what status, it is right to serve tea and water in front of him without saying a word.

Everyone around you knows that Mr. e has a hobby of insulting. Men think that although his words are poisonous and insulting, they are still authentic, so they generally don't care about him. But women can't. They gave up once or twice for mutual affection, but they couldn't stand it any longer, so there were often unpleasant quarrels around Mr. E, so that every time Mr. E appeared, the man always told his girlfriend, "Just ignore what E said and don't take what he said."

Someone once pointed out this shortcoming of Mr. E to his face, but he asked, "I can't afford to joke. How can I have fun?"

But, sir, is your joke too unique? That's not a joke, that's a provocation.

There are many ways of humor, but verbal attacks are not among them.

You think you speak very well and have a good sense of humor, but you can tell a seriously ill patient directly, "why not die?" Don't treat him ",which may accidentally hit the last line of defense, make people disheartened and give up hope of survival.

You think you are manly and outspoken, but you can't wait to get divorced as soon as you get married. If you are in love with your husband and wife, you should persuade them to get divorced as soon as possible. If you get married, you should talk about the next funeral. When others are in a good mood, they will always pour cold water on them, and even your joke will cause a big fight between husband and wife. You still applaud: "divorce early and give you a big gift."

But do you really want your seriously ill friend to die early? Do you really want to encourage others to divorce?

Actually, it's not.

You just think you are joking innocently and telling the truth about educating your wife, but have you ever thought about how unbearable your words are to ordinary people?

True humor is to make people smile or laugh, but what do you think of humor? But it is defined as "oral poison", "oral bad" and "oral damage". Different adjectives have the same meaning: not a good mouth.

For example, Dai Sheng, a scholar in the Western Han Dynasty, said, "A gentleman must not slip away, lose his reputation, or keep his mouth shut." Be careful what you say and do, don't say things to others, and don't do things you shouldn't do.

Friends can be open and honest, but all this is based on the premise of not hurting each other, which does not mean that they can be outspoken and everything is forgiven.

You think you're joking, just saying, but no matter how familiar you are, you can't help attacking again and again, and you can't fight back. When your jokes often hurt the lives of friends around you, you should reflect. This is verbal injury, not humor. Although the Chinese character culture is profound, don't misinterpret the meaning of humor.