Is there a joke in life because you can't speak Mandarin?

Is there a joke in life because you can't speak Mandarin? There are:

A couple named Li gave birth to a son named Ben. One day, Li Ben suddenly ran away from home, so the couple went to the police station to report the case.

The policeman asked her husband, "What's your name?" What's your Cantonese name? "

The husband replied: "Li Guangxian" (you first, Cantonese "you first")

The policeman asked the woman again, "What's your name?"

The woman replied, "I live in Wugang." (Forget it, Cantonese "Forget it for the time being")

The policeman was furious and said, "Kim, what are you doing here?" "(Cantonese" What are you doing here ")

The couple loudly replied: "Steady and foolish." ("You are so stupid," playing tricks on you, teasing and fooling "in Cantonese)

Saying a county magistrate with a strong accent in Hunan went to the village to make a report:

"Rabbit, shrimp, pig tail! Without pickles, pickles are too expensive! "

Attention, comrades and villagers! Stop talking and have a meeting now! )

After the county magistrate finished speaking, the host said, "Please give me sausages and pickles!"

Now, please talk to the township head! )

The township head said, "Rabbit, the dog ate today's meal, and everyone is a big jerk!" "

Comrades, that's enough for today. Let's make a big bowl! )"

No pickles, I'll pick up a piece of shit and lick it for you. . . "

Don't talk, I'll tell you a story. . . )

Taoyuan dialect is very strange and has a high ending. For example, "ju" is pronounced "pig".

Go to the propaganda department of the county party Committee first and contact the personnel bureau for an interview. The propaganda department called me to make an appointment, using public address.

Propaganda Department: "Hello, are you a pig? (Personnel Bureau) "

The other party: "No, you are mistaken. I am not a person but a pig (Personnel Bureau), and my mother is a pig (Grain Bureau). "

I tried to hold back my laughter and my stomach hurt.

The next day, I attended a briefing in a county. Roll call before the meeting.

Moderator: "Which units have arrived?" So the participants signed up one by one:

"I am a wild boar (Public Security Bureau)."

"My name is Pig (Education Bureau)."

"I am a pig (post office)."

"I am a typical pig (telecommunications bureau)

Of course there is,

A man came to Beijing from other places, got on a bus in Beijing, took out a 50 yuan bill and said to the flight attendant in nonstandard Mandarin, "Did you see it? Did you see it? " The flight attendant is in a hurry. Isn't it the local leopard? The flight attendant took out a 100 yuan bill and said, "What's the big deal? I've never seen money. This is bigger than yours. Did you see it! " As a result, I learned later that people had no change, so I asked her for a ticket of 50 yuan to buy "Jianguomen"!

Is there any software that can speak Mandarin? You can download the app client's shopping mall directly with your mobile phone, search directly in it, and then find the software that suits you and download it. It's best to find software with higher scores.

Are there any Korean movies that speak Mandarin? Only website translation. I suggest you search for a good Korean drama before searching for the Mandarin version-

Is there a place to speak Mandarin in Xinjiang? I wonder what your definition of Putonghua is? Now my compatriots are fluent in Mandarin, but every place should have its own dialect or local accent, as long as it is not hard to hear or understand.

& lt Maoshan School > Can anyone speak Mandarin? & lt Maoshan School > Can anyone speak Mandarin?

-Of course, there are people who speak Mandarin!

Excuse me, have you ever written a composition joking in Mandarin? Urgent! Urgent! Urgent! A few days ago, a tricycle came from west to east on the construction road of Dancheng and stopped in front of the post office. After a while, the tricycle worker saw two foreign female passengers sitting still and said, "This is the post office, you can get off." Two female passengers looked at the sign in front of the post office and said in Mandarin, "We are going to the drugstore." The tricycle worker listened and said, "Yes, this is post and telecommunications." So, they were forced to get off the bus, but they just sat still, which caused a dispute and attracted some people to watch. Upon inquiry, it turned out that tricycle workers mistook "pharmacy" for "post and telecommunications".

One day, a Wumeng man entered a hotel in Beijing. Xiao er greeted him warmly and asked, "What do you want to eat?" "Sixty-one steamed buns." The Wumeng people replied. "Would you like some tea?" "Seventy-one pots of tea." "Do you want garlic?" "Eighty-one garlic." "Brother, how many people are you coming?" "ninety-one people." "Oh, I'll do it for you right away." Finally, the bartender and chef were so tired that they vomited blood and died.

Is there a live broadcast of Arsenal in Mandarin? Yes, five-star sports speaks Mandarin below, and they also bought your next live broadcast of pplive or uusee. Every time there is a game, there is a connection, which is very convenient.

Mandarin 1 Are there any jokes? One day, we went to a wishing pool. I bent down and made a wish, and then threw a coin into the well. You wanted to make a wish, but when you bent down, you accidentally fell into the well. I was startled and muttered, What a coincidence!

2. A four-year-old boy kissed a three-year-old girl, and the girl told the boy that if you kissed me, you would be responsible for me. The boy patted the girl on the shoulder maturely and said with a smile: Don't worry, we are not children of one or two years old!

Late at night, Bush saw bin Laden standing in front of his bed and criticized his head. Bush was startled and said, How dare you break into the White House at night! Bin Laden shook his chest-high beard and said with a grimace, "It's so soft and confident!"!

4. A patient with indigestion complained to the doctor: I have been very abnormal recently. How to eat cucumber and watermelon to return to normal? The doctor is silent for a moment, then you can only eat shit.

5. Mouse: I am in love with bats now, and the children will live in the air from now on, not afraid of your cat. The cat sneered, pointed to the owl in the tree and said, look, she is pregnant with my child!

6. The science teacher asked: Why is the body cold after death? No one answered. The teacher asked again: Does nobody know? At this time, a classmate stood up and said, that's because you are calm and naturally cool.