I said, old bastard, your mind is full of three kingdoms, from cross talk performances.

This is the traditional cross talk "Full House of Three Kingdoms"

A: As a crosstalk performer, you must have a high literary accomplishment.

B: An artist can't work without studying literature!

What do you like about literature?

I like prose, novels, poems and plays.

Do you still like reading novels?

B: I don't study, but I do. I especially like reading China's classical novels such as The World Gazette, The Water Margin, A Dream of Red Mansions, The Journey to the West, etc. In particular, I dare say I have a unique opinion on The Romance of the Three Kingdoms.

Do you talk too much?

B: Not much. This is still on sale!

A: Since you have a unique opinion on the Romance of the Three Kingdoms, I'd like to ask you a question.

B: Well, I will answer your questions and guide you at any time.

A: Welcome here!

I am seeking truth from facts.

A: Let me ask you, who is the most capable figure in the Romance of the Three Kingdoms? In other words, who has the ability?

B: Who has the ability?

A: Ah.

B: Guan Yu. Guan Yu is capable.

A: What can Guan Yu do?

B: Yan Liang beheaded, Wen Chou beheaded, five customs and six generals beheaded, and the ancient city of Cai Yang beheaded. The seventh army flooded, escaped from the ban, killed Pound, shocked China, and scared Cao Cao to move the capital. How capable Guan Yu is!

A: Guan Yu is too capable. Why did Hulao Pass fight Lu Bu with three British troops? Why can't the three brothers beat Lu Bu alone? Then who has the ability?

This means that Lu Bu is capable.

A: What is Lyu3 bu4 capable of?

B: Well, Lyu3 bu4 among people and Red among horses are exempt from service. He shot a halberd at Yuan and Liu in Yuanmen, but General Ji Ling was helpless. Lu Bu is capable.

A: Lu Bu was so powerful that Cao Cao killed him in the White Gate Tower. Then who has the ability?

B: Then Cao Cao is capable.

What does Cao do?

B: Cao Cao ordered his ministers to destroy Yuan Shao, set Liaodong, levy Wu Huan, surrender to Zhang Lu, cut down Liu Biao, and go down to the south of the Yangtze River. He was a hero in the world. Cao Cao is very capable.

A: Cao Cao is so capable. Why did Puyang meet Lu Bu, Wancheng met Zhang Xiu, Huarong Road met Guan Yu, cut his robe in Tongguan and took a boat to avoid arrows in Weishui? Battle of Red Cliffs was almost caught by Zhou Yu. Then who has the ability?

B: In that case, Zhou Yu is capable.

A: Zhou Yu's ability is great. Did he make Kong Ming angry at Chai Sangkou? Then who has the ability?

B: Then Zhuge Liang is capable.

A: Zhuge Liang is so capable that Sima Yi prevented him from leaving Qishan six times. Then who has the ability?

B: Well ... this is Sima Yi's ability.

A: Sima Yi's ability is so great that he can't be reused under Cao Cao. Cao Cao said that he can't be entrusted with an important task because he has an eagle eye to protect wolves. Then who has the ability?

B: That's ... You're very capable.

What can I do?

You got me! Isn't this a dispute?

A: Through talking with you, you can say that you are familiar with the Three Kingdoms.

Are you familiar with it? Let me tell you, there is nothing else in this belly. ...

A: What are they?

B: Three Kingdoms. Full of "Three Kingdoms".

A: Three full countries?

B: I often publish papers in this field, not only writing articles, but also talking about the Three Kingdoms.

A: Where did you say that?

B: I've said it everywhere.

A: How about the radio station?

B: Yes.

A: Organ?

B: Yes.

A: Rural areas?

B: Yes. Don't ask, we have talked about every occasion and every meeting.

A: Did you say it at the flat peach party on March 3rd?

B: It was mentioned at the temple fair.

A: What is the temple fair for? On the third day of March, the birthday of the Queen Mother and the birthday of the Queen Mother of the West, did you say anything there?

B: No!

A: Didn't you say everything?

B: In that case, I still have to go.

Yes, but I can't go this year.

B: Why?

A: The host changed this year. Every year is the beginning of Buddha.

What about this year?

A: Master Tian Tong. The confidant has also changed.

B: Who is it?

A: Maitreya Buddha with a big belly.

B: Maitreya?

Do you know his origin? Long-eared fairy, wildcat essence, son of a bitch. Have you seen The Romance of the Gods?

B: Yes.

A: Because of Wanxian Array, he did not make great contributions to shaking the Six Souls. Later, he asked the Buddha to lower his ears and sew up his mouth, so that he became a Maitreya Buddha and let him guard the worse. Today, he is a little man who has achieved his goal. When the new official took office, he posted a notice outside the gate: all immortals who go to the Flat Peach Club are not allowed to touch wine, color or money.

B: What about debauchery and wealth?

A: As long as you touch the edge of these four words, you are not allowed to go to the meeting, not even the door that came close. I saw Guan Yunchang riding a red hare, Zhou Cang carrying a dragon crescent moon blade, and even Guan ribs carrying a sword rushed to the worse. Maitreya's face fell: "What people! Go less! "

B: Maitreya doesn't know Guan Yu?

A: Yes.

B: Then why do you ask?

A: I mean to find fault! "Finally, Guan Yu was given to the Queen Mother to celebrate her birthday." "What life do you worship? Hey hey, please go back! "

B: He's blocked!

A: "Why don't you let me in!" Maitreya pointed with his hand: "Look at the notice!" "I have seen it. Those who touch wine, color or wealth are not allowed to enter the worse place. I don't touch a word? " "You? You have all four words! "

This is a dirty lie!

A: "How did you get this wine word?" "Warm wine ribs Hua Xiong, did you drink it?"

B: what about the color?

A: "You have been in Cao Ying for twelve years. Isn't it shameful that Cao Cao gave you ten beautiful women? "

B: Nonsense. I gave ten beautiful women, and they didn't want them. They both served the wives of two emperors. They live in the backyard and Guan Yu holds a candle in the front yard.

A: I waited on the wives of two emperors in the backyard and fell asleep in the middle of the night. Who knows if they were invited?

B: argue irrationally! Where is the money?

A: "Get on and get off. Isn't that wealth? "

B: I didn't ask for a gold seal!

I know. He is looking for his brother in Hebei. So much gold and silver is too heavy to carry. If there had been a money order, he would have remitted the money home.

How irritating! What about anger?

A: "How can you kill without anger?" I was so angry that Guan Yu's face turned red at once. Why Guan Yu is a red face is to make Maitreya angry.

B: Really?

A: Guan Yu was so angry that his eyebrows stood up and his eyes widened.

B: No, Guan Yu kills people as soon as he stares.

A: No, Guan Yu wants to argue with him. Zhou Cang is a rude man. As soon as Guan Yu stared, he handed the dragon crescent moon blade. Guan Ping saw that he was going to die, so he stopped him: "Don't be angry with him. We can't beat him. This son of a bitch is full of Three Kingdoms! "

B: Huh? Me!