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1, buy popsicles. 1.5 yuan. To the boss 10 yuan. Boss, change, 8.5 yuan. Then throw 8.5 yuan into the trash can. Wrong idea, throw the popsicle into the trash can. I left a sorbet paper in my hand. . . Cold. . . . Finally, I rummaged through the trash can there myself. . 2. Some time ago, I went shopping in Lotus in Yichu, and two foreign friends checked out in front of the cashier. At this time, the clerk asked, "Can you speak Chinese?" Two foreign friends replied in Chinese, "If you speak slowly, we can understand!" The clerk went on to say, "OK ... you ... talk ... China people?" Because I have the habit of washing my hands after every meal, do you pay attention to hygiene? Unfortunately, one day, when I was eating, a classmate asked me loudly in class, "Why do you wash your hands after every meal?" "I answered him inexplicably:" Wash your hands before and after meals. . 。” Suddenly, the whole class was silent. . . It was in the first grade of primary school. Now it's really ... that afternoon in the self-study class, the teacher assigned us to do our homework and said, whoever finishes the homework of the day first can go home first! The teacher corrects his homework on the podium himself! ! ! ! My buddy was a good student. It's only 15 minutes after the end of the 40-minute self-study class, and I'm almost finished. Because I was so absorbed in writing, I forgot that I was at home in class, thinking that I was almost finished, I looked up and shouted: Mom, I want to eat steamed sausage and fried eggs at night (this is my favorite)! I didn't pay attention at that time, and the teacher didn't pay attention and agreed: OK! The teacher's family is also a son. At the same time, my teacher and I thought the sound was wrong, only to find out that it was at school. The two of us, ......................, were sweating like a pig, and then the whole class burst into laughter. ..........., as a result, left early for self-study class and was laughed at by his classmates for a semester. 5. I once invited a friend to dinner, and after ordering n dishes, I suddenly found that I didn't bring my wallet at all! ! I'm dizzy, but I'm not saying that the food after that is like chewing wax to me. I just want to get through this. Then I suddenly remembered, picked up my mobile phone and pretended to dial a phone. I yelled at the phone for a long time and said some nonsense, saying nothing about why I took my wallet. At this time, my friend said shyly, I paid, I paid, you didn't know your husband took the wallet. It doesn't matter. Just when I was happy that this white lie was about to succeed, suddenly the phone rang loudly in my ear ... a boy in the class fainted. His classmates surrounded him, and some knowledgeable students shouted in the outer circle: pinch people, pinch people. The female classmate closest to him thought for a long time, made great determination and accurately pinched the man's penis. Last Sunday, she went back to her hometown in the country to visit her grandparents. It happened that my little uncle was there. We just chatted and watched TV, and saw half of our little uncles suddenly have a stomachache. ! ! My grandmother went to the toilet and cursed my uncle, saying, what a big man! And curse! Uncle: Sorry. Oh, my God. I just wiped P shares ... halfway through ... suddenly my nose runs. So I naturally picked up the toilet paper in my hand and wiped my nose ... .........., that's grandma's worst smile I've ever seen! 8. My girlfriend asked me to go to the hospital the other day. I asked what was going on. She said her legs are a little bent, which is also commonly known as O-legs. She felt that it affected her beauty, so she decided to go to the hospital to see if there was any solution. Because my girlfriend has always been gentle, I feel a little embarrassed. It was her first time to come to the hospital for beauty treatment, so when the doctor asked her what was going on, she said, doctor, I have everything between my legs. The doctor was shocked and immediately said: nonsense, the gentlemen didn't meet ... 9. On the Mid-Autumn Festival in Grade Two, my pager suddenly rang in class and the teacher confiscated it. In the afternoon, the teacher called me to the office and severely criticized me, asking me to write a 2000-word examination. Finally, after the training, the teacher touched the desk with his finger: "Take it back. "At that time, I was stunned by the training. I looked up at a box of beautifully packaged moon cakes on the table (in fact, it was a welfare given to teachers by the school), and I was greatly grateful. I completely forgot my own BP machine, grabbed the moon cake and ran ... The teacher came out slowly and sighed ... 10. I drew a pig in class that day and stuck it in front of my classmates. " 1 1, grabbed a big cock by the neck but didn't dare to go under the knife. After a long hesitation, the chicken was strangled by me. 12, once eating and chatting in the canteen, I suddenly found myself dropping a grain of rice outside, secretly feeling sorry for the farmer's uncle's waste of food, so I picked it up and ate it. But then I found out that this meal didn't seem to be mine ... 13. Once I took a bus, there was a beautiful mm next to me, and there was a pervert behind her. When I saw mm, I turned around and shouted, "You squeeze a JB!" The whole car was silent, only to hear that pervert timidly say "a JB." The whole car burst into laughter, and then the pervert got off at the next stop 14, another toilet. My classmate's university is a key university. I haven't been there, but I heard that the facilities are in place, such as electronic reading room and campus card. What's even more ridiculous is that the toilet is still voice-activated flushing. On one occasion, she was texting while defecating, and when she was about to get up, she accidentally dropped her cell phone and the urinal was very shallow. Actually, it's okay if she picks it up right away. But-when the phone fell, she was startled and unconsciously shouted "Ah!" As a result, the mobile phone was washed away ... 15.a: Is my head a cow B? B: Like 16, one day, turn on the water in the unit canteen. Accidentally, the water splashed on my hand, and a MM behind me took my hand and asked with concern, "Did you burn your hand?" "Although it hurts, in order to show my manhood, I just gritted my teeth and said," Nothing, nothing. "Then pretend as if nothing had happened. MM suddenly turned to the people waiting in line behind her and said, "Go home, the water didn't boil again today. "17, I passed a crossroads that day and wanted to fart. There happened to be a man riding a motorcycle, so I wanted to take this opportunity to cover my fart. I don't know, the noise is too loud. The motorcyclist thinks it's started, and he's leaving when he's in gear. I was embarrassed that time ... 18, the comrades in the dormitory came from all corners of the country. Beef with scallion! " A boy from Gansu asked curiously, "What do you mean by' whole'?" Northeast China replied: "Eating is eating." In the evening, the three of us went to the bathroom, and the sewer was blocked, resulting in two thousand gold in it. When the boys in Northeast China saw it, they were furious: "What a mess! ? "The voice did not fall, and the dust in Gansu was like earth, and the retching was not stopped ... 19. Someone bathed his 3-year-old daughter. Just after putting her daughter in the basin, her daughter shouted," Mom, look, dad is picking up girls. " In other words, one day, the bus was so crowded that it was difficult to get on and off. A gentleman wanted to get off the bus, but a couple from other places got stuck in the car door. A gentleman who wanted to get off the bus squeezed hard and finally squeezed behind the couple, and the driver caught up as soon as he braked. Unfortunately, he stepped on her husband. The husband didn't say anything, but the wife shouted at the top of her lungs, "What are you doing? Who knows that the woman is adamant and still shouts "You are crazy, you are crazy, you are crazy" over and over again. A gentleman endured it, endured it, got off the bus, turned to the woman who was still shouting, and suddenly came-"Repeater, you! ! "The whole car is hilarious.

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