Classic funny quotes, the spherical shape is also a kind of body shape

1. When everyone can use each other, it is because each other is not strong enough.

2. I firmly believe that your musical talent definitely does not lie in the display of simple vocals.

3. Living is to make a leap in the chaos.

4. The reason why Zhu Bajie has to go through the hardships of learning is that he has never met a Chang'e like you.

5. You are the frog at the bottom of the well, but you still haven’t even reached the bottom of the well.

6. Now my thoughts are very Dongporou, but my emotions are very salty and pepper pork ribs.

7. I tried hard to control the demon in my heart, but I ignored that you might just be the devil

8. Only when you have been drunk can you know you are stupid, and only when you have been in love can you know what a fool is.

9. Who said that change has little power? You know, two dollars can prevent the smooth birth of a new life.

10. I don’t like her, I like my script, but my script is that I deeply love her.

11. I used to miss you so much that I couldn’t change my feelings, and it was not true love that I gave only in vain.

12. A good horse never turns back to eat grass, so I kept walking forward in a circle without turning back, and I ran into that grass again.

13. I think you are a professional net-weaver, and you specialize in catching penguins.

14. There is nothing special about you, you just have a strong face.

15. My advantage is: I know my mistakes and can correct them... My disadvantage is: I make corrections very low-key.

16. No matter what happens, don’t let your feelings sow seeds at will, otherwise they will take root and you will have to struggle to pull them out even if you want to. If the roots are deep, you will be unable to pull them out even if you want to.

17. Your outstandingness is described by a cross: the facial features are very delicate, but the combination is very vague.

18. The spherical shape is also a body shape!

19. Nonsense is the first sentence in interpersonal relationships.

20. Problems that can be solved with money are not problems, but the problem is that I am poor.

21. People say that you can be romantic even if you die under the peonies. Now that the peonies are gone, only a bunch of hibiscus is left. But I don’t want to be romantic even in my life.

22. Being able to mix so many bad habits of human beings so perfectly, I believe that if you go out on the street in the rain, Thor will feel sorry if he can't touch you.

23. Spring is here, the trees are sprouting, and the stock market is turning green.

24. Live in a coward, live in a cowardly way, and live in a cowardly state.

25. Such strenuous exercise as going out on the street is not suitable for me. My great wish is to sit in front of the computer and compete in meditation on Sundays.

26. One rose lasts forever, and 99 roses last forever. 99 roses are relatively luxurious and last forever.

27. Even if I am small, when I work hard to live for myself, I am still great, but I don’t know the size of greatness.

28. It is said that beauty matches a beast. I will be a beast at any time.

29. Vulgarity is a breakthrough, especially when elegance and nobility don't work.

30. It’s not that my happiness has to be based on your pain, it’s just that you have to let your pain make me laugh.

31. There was once a woman who wanted to transform me, but in the end she only dismantled my parts and never put them back together with me.

32. Why do we all give the darkness to the devil? Because they are brave and are not afraid of the dark.

33. You are very kind, especially when you feel sorry for others.

34. The reason why first love is beautiful is that it tells us that there will be more next love.

35. When you chase the prince charming in your heart, the frog waiting for you is actually a prince and will be fished away.

36. Being ugly is not your fault, and being stupid is not your fault, but showing your ugliness and stupidity to the fullest cannot be used to flaunt your great achievements. Be humble.

37. Lying is a man’s prerogative, and being cheated is a woman’s patent. A collection of classic Internet quotations: Obesity is also a kind of body shape

1. With your understanding, you may not understand even if I explain it. So, you continue to be confused.

2. Before I met you, my world was black and white. After I met you, wow, it was all black.

3. Among good friends, you must cultivate a confidant. Don’t think that you are so versatile and have friends everywhere. In the end, there is only one who is really true to you, believe me.

4. The Internet has made me ignore the reality, but I have been struggling, but no one understands how tired I am, so they no longer want to stay, and we will be well...

5 , Life will not always be kind to us, there will be setbacks, and we will experience failures. We must learn to face it calmly with an optimistic attitude towards life, and greet it with a peaceful and indifferent state of mind. When we regard these as a valuable asset in our life, the sky of the soul will not always be hazy. Cherish these experiences, treat your life well, and believe that the bright sunshine will shine in every corner of the world.

6. No matter how bad your grades are, you still smile brightly. This is the dignity of a bad student

7. Fat is an attitude, and meat is a spirit. , Obesity is also a body shape.

8. In that life, you were a butterfly and I was a fallen flower. The heart of the flower was broken, and the butterfly wings were flying to the end of the world. In that life, you were a clear spring and I was the crescent moon. Their shapes and shadows were incompatible with each other, and they wasted their time. In that life, You are the pipa, I am the strings, playing songs in troubled times, and loving the world. How can the blood-stained painting of the country be compared to the cinnabar between your brows? It is nothing but prosperity. As long as you smile like a flower, I am willing to give up the painting of the country and return to the field to guard the armor. The imperial hegemony can be lost to my colleagues in the blink of an eye. You got drunk.

9. Don’t look at things you shouldn’t see, say things you shouldn’t say, listen to things you shouldn’t hear, think about things you shouldn’t think about, and do whatever you should do.

10. People’s looks are divided into two categories: one is naturally beautiful, and the other is naturally inspirational.

11. Unknowingly, I have lost myself again. Why do you love me? I just came back

12. I suddenly discovered an interesting pattern: no matter what we watch is a romantic drama or a youth idol drama, when the male protagonist and the female protagonist get married at the end, the TV or movie will end. What does it mean? This is a profound explanation: as long as a man and a woman get married, there will be nothing left to do later!

13. Only after entering the examination room did I realize what it means to cry without tears, bullshit can't be done

14. Only after wishful thinking do you realize how ugly (stinky) it is to follow others

15. As long as you think it is right, do it, insist on doing it, and don’t care about other people’s opinions, even if it is Wrong, at least you have done it to prove that you have worked hard.

16. Keep a good distance between people. If you are too close, you will hurt someone. If you are too far, you will hurt someone.

17. I hope that the telephone, the Internet, high-speed rail and airplanes are not invented. Then you may not be able to bear the longing for me and come over to see me.

18. Study hard and want to do it every day.

19. The poppy flower is very beautiful, but I have lost the courage to get close to it.

20. The terrible winter is coming. If anyone can install an air conditioner in our classroom, we will Just marry the head teacher to him

Collection 2 of classic Internet quotations:

1. Just because I took one more look at you in the crowd, I became blind.

2. Let me tell you some terms: January 1st is Little Singles’ Day, January 11th and November 1st are Medium Singles’ Day, and November 11th is Big Singles’ Day. The male bachelor is called Guangguang, the female bachelor is called Mingming, and the one who is a couple is called Shuangshuang. The mascot of Singles' Day is 4 fried dough sticks and 1 egg. When placed together, it becomes 1111.

Recently, friends on the Internet have been discussing the possibility that November 11 of the lunar calendar coincides with the solar calendar.

3. Only after taking the exam did I know that I had so many incompetences.

4. Waiting for a discovery, waiting for a touch, let love boil again

5. People are inert. This is innate, but we can change it the day after tomorrow. This inertia because so many people are changing. Don't wait for others to do it before I think about something or a business. Don’t wait until others have already made money before I want to do it. What no one believes in is the market and opportunities, what everyone believes in is called expansion.

6. I will not give up and continue to preview; I have no doubt that there will be a miracle. I want to light up a dazzling red light for my future self! No matter what, I will die no matter what, so what if I die? At least I am strong and magnanimous!

7. In a martial arts style at noon Eat at a restaurant, the food there is average, the price is relatively cheap, and the characteristic is that everything there has a martial arts style. Call customers guest officers and call waiters waiters. The names of the dishes are also in the style of martial arts, the braised pig's trotters are called the Eighteen Palms of the Dragon, and the mutton pot is called the Nine Yang Divine Art. When we were eating Nine Sun Magic Skills at noon, a little kid was running around on the table. He got angry and called the waiter over. When he saw it, the waiter shouted: There is an assassin!

8. You bitch likes to take advantage so much. If you had taken advantage of others, you would have become a fucking paraplegic.

9. I’m holding the whole place! The chef thought fiercely, picked up a bag of salt, and poured it all into the soup.

10. Don’t often go online to do boring things and play meaningless games in your free time. Read some literary works, learn some business processes, management regulations, international current affairs, and legal knowledge. This will ensure you have something to talk about at any party.

11. Those who are willing to suffer losses will not be able to suffer losses after all. If they suffer too much, they will always be rewarded generously; those who love to take advantage will definitely not be able to take advantage. They will win a small profit but lose a lot. No matter how good things are, you can't keep them for a long time. You don't need to think about giving them back for a while. It's better to always have compassion and help and love, so as to win people's hearts and have no shortage of other things. Don't think that success or failure has no cause. Today's bitter fruit is yesterday's sowing; the present contribution is tomorrow's good reward.

12. Inspiration is a whisper from God to you, but God is very busy and will not tell you a second time

13. Stress is inevitable, and insomnia is helpless. , so don’t be anxious, don’t be irritable, and accept it calmly. If you can't avoid it, go ahead. If you can't sleep at night, then sleep during the day.

14. You are gold and I am coal. You will shine and I will generate heat. Don't make me angry, or I'll make you melt.

15. [The so-called Singles’ Day is a warning omen the day before the midterm exam]

16. You have the right to remain silent, and everything you say will be recorded. You can ask for a proxy server. If you can't afford one, the network will assign one to you.

17. A man who doesn’t prepare new year’s money for his wife is not a good husband, and a woman who doesn’t buy new clothes for her husband is not a good wife.

18. Everyone has his own destiny, don’t Be jealous of people and things that you would never touch. "Lucky Charm"

19. Life mottos ① I would rather have an open enemy than a despicable friend; ② I would rather have an upright dissident than a treacherous confidant; ③ I would rather be betrayed at the beginning. If you don't like it, don't be disliked gradually in the future; ④ Communication without trust is like a mobile phone without network signal, only suitable for playing games by yourself.

20. Jiang Zhishu, Hu Yifei, Gu Li, Gu Yuan, the four university tyrants, please help me turn around in the midterm exam

Three collections of classic online quotations:

1. Old advice: Girl, you have to eat properly to lose weight!

2. What is personality disharmony is an excuse because you no longer like this person. Everything is right when you fall in love, but what is right becomes wrong when you are not in love.

3. It was also on that night, in the endlessly rolling warm pool water and the advanced LED cold light under the water, that I suddenly understood what the adults said before, what is life: life is Force majeure is the only clause in the contract that will always exist and that no one can change. ---Guo Jingming's "Little Times 3"

4. A certain bachelor's signature was changed to: Those who have a crush on me, how can you be so calm? ! !

5. From Cauchy: From Taylor: From Weierstrass: From Leibniz: From Lópida: From Newton: From Lagrange: From Fermat: From Roth Er: Young man, I wish you will not fail your final exam.

6. In this ninth heaven, he is my only one. I have been thinking about how, after the child is born, I will hold the child's hand with him and watch the sea of ??clouds billowing ten miles away, and the golden light flowing across the sky. He doesn't know how important light is to me. ---Tang Qi Gongzi "Three Lives Three Worlds Ten Miles of Peach Blossom"

7. Mom gave me a toothpick, and I want to pry the earth

8. We are always looking for ourselves, in the movie There, in novels and plays, the people there have their own shadows on them, and then they fit in accordingly. The self in my heart is getting further and further away, so far away that it has become blurry. No matter what, don’t lose yourself and remember the way you came. We all have to find ourselves and become ourselves. No eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body or mind, no color, sound, fragrance or touch. Only when you find yourself will others find you!

9. I once told myself that if I can’t move my sincerity, I should try not to move. If I really feel my sincerity, I should at least remain calm. This way I can at least not hurt my self-esteem. However, at that moment, I Unexpectedly, I burst into tears. He turned around and ran away, not daring to take another look. ---Canoe "Stars in the Deep Sea"

10. Success requires costs ① The world is not in the hands of those who ridicule, but in the hands of those who can withstand ridicule and criticism and move forward. ② Work requires cost, and time is also a cost. Cherishing time is saving costs; ③ Action is a good medicine to cure fear, while hesitation and procrastination will continue to nourish fear; ④ Investing in knowledge is wise, investing in the network knowledge makes you wiser.

11. Sexy women are not coquettish, but playboy men are the meanest.

12. The philosopher said that the difference between wisdom and intelligence is that wise people know how to choose and get rid of entanglements, which can make us more open-minded and live a more free and easy life. When you are in a dilemma, tell yourself that there are gains and losses. If you choose watermelon, then bravely throw away the sesame seeds.

13. Everything has a shelf life, so can you still have love that has passed its shelf life?

14. The mistress is the greatest woman in the world. She bears the infamy and helps others. Do you recognize the true colors of men

15. A: Sister, if someone hurts you, how long will it take for you to forgive him? B: Forgiving him is a matter for God, and my task is to send her to see God. . . .

16. Being tired means that you are often indecisive between persisting and giving up. The trouble is that the memory is too good. What should be remembered and what should not be remembered will remain in the memory.

19. Footprints are silent language, greetings are the blooming of flowers, blessings are the surge of the heart, messages are the sails of friendship, and meeting you online is a kind of fate. May fate maintain our friendship; Meeting your blog is a kind of beauty, may beauty shine in your life; meeting you in life is a kind of happiness, I sincerely wish my friend happiness and joy to be with you forever!

20. Combining a series of Qing palace dramas such as "Gong Bubu Jingxin" and "Gong Bubu Jingxin" together, it is a living "Girls Yongzheng Chased in Those Years".

Classic love quotes: Nonsense is also a kind of dependence

1. Modern people live in an illusion. He thinks that she knows what he wants, but in fact he just wants what he is expected to want by the outside world.

2. No matter what you choose, as long as it is your own choice, there will be no regrets about right or wrong. The past you will not satisfy the present you, and the present you will not satisfy the future you. If you had the courage to choose in the first place, you should also have the courage to bear the consequences. The so-called growth of a person means having the courage to face oneself cruelly: before choosing, have a sincere and firm face; after choosing, have a heart that will never change.

3. I only like to lose my temper with you, because I subconsciously believe that you will not leave me. Bullshit is also a form of dependence.

4. I drew a ring on the ring finger of my left hand, imagining the day when I would no longer have to bear my own joys and sorrows alone.

5. I am willing to shake hands with the world and compromise with the world gently. Perhaps it was after witnessing life and death that Neng suddenly realized how much he wanted to meet someone and become a useful person. Principles were not so important, the bottom line was not so rigid, and compromise did not mean weakness. Only by letting yourself relax can you free yourself from the heavy past.

6. Along the way, I got seven smiles and three eye rolls, so I responded with 70% of the strength to smiles and 30% of the strength to respond to the rolls of eyes; the food I ate was delicious seven times and difficult three times. When eating, I use 70% of my sense of taste to enjoy the delicious food, and 30% of my sense of taste to endure the bitterness. I have no intention of amplifying the goodwill of the world, nor the malice of the world. I just accept the weather, sunny or rainy, in proportion. The world and I are just each other. ——Tsai Kangyong

7. I want to have an honest relationship. My parents know it, and so do his parents. When I am bored, my mother will naturally say: "Call and ask him to take you out to play."

8. I miss you, but I can't tell you, just like driving A tree full of pear blossoms can never bear apples. I miss you, but I can't tell you, just like the rainbow hanging high in the sky, no one can ever touch it. I miss you, but I can't tell you, just like the train track, no ship will ever pass by. I miss you, but I really can't tell you. I'm just afraid that if I tell you, it will also be a kind of torture for you.

9. I believe that people who have been depressed or are currently depressed in this world have soft hearts. This softness is half kindness and half cowardice. When a person cannot win the world and cannot convince himself, weakness becomes a sharp weapon to torture himself, cutting his life bit by bit.

10. I hope you are happy, because that is my greatest wish. I am afraid that you will be happy, because then you will forget me.

11. I think you are very happy, because you can choose to love me or not to love me, but I can only choose to love you or love you more.

12. I know clearly that without the despair of life, there will be no love for life. There are certain defined limits within which people can engage in creativity. However, love has no boundaries. If I can embrace everything, it doesn't matter if I hug it awkwardly.

13. I would rather live a peaceful and imperfect life than pretend to be perfect all my life.

14. We always meet the most beautiful love in the age when we least understand love.

15. We always think that we will find someone we love very much. But when we look back, we realize how naive we were. If you never start, how do you know whether you will love that person very much?

16. We will always fall in love with some people when we are unguarded. There's no reason, maybe just a gentle smile and a concerned greeting. They may have never met, they may not share the same interests, they may not be on the same level, but they are firmly in their hearts. Everything comes when it should come, and there is nowhere to escape. Just like liking a song, it is often because of a melody or a lyric that touches you. Like it or hate it, it's a confusing thing.

17. In our life, we always have to see many people who are much better than ourselves. If you always see people who are worse than you, then you need to reflect on whether your life is constantly sinking? If you often encounter people who lag behind you as you move forward, then congratulations, you are making continuous progress. You will feel inferior, but this inferiority can be turned into motivation.

18. What we complain about later is often what we loved first. Things have not changed but the environment has changed. The scenery has not changed but the eyes have changed. Others have not changed but I have changed. It's just that when we complain, if we can look back and think about why we chose him, loved him, and appreciated him in the first place. If he is still the same person as before, let us try to see him again with the eyes of his youth. ——Liu Yong

19. We are all insecure people. Even though I know it's a bit unreasonable, I just want to prove my importance.

20. We all once thought that there are some things that cannot be let go. As time goes by, when you look back, you will find that the things you once thought you could not let go are just a springboard for the moment of life. If you skip it, it will become more exciting. When a person is on a springboard, the most difficult thing is not the moment when he jumps off, but the struggle, helplessness and worry about gains and losses in his heart before he jumps off. We thought we couldn't jump over it, so we closed our eyes, mustered up the courage, and jumped over it.

Mood talk: Forgetting is also a kind of happiness, letting go is also a kind of deep love

1. Some lyrics are deeply rooted in people's hearts. What we listen to is the song or ourselves.

2. You have to remember that he likes to stay up late, smoke and be alone, so you have to urge him to sleep every day, smoke less and talk to him more.

3. Don’t lose your future in the vast crowd.

4. Sometimes, there are some words and some things that I just hope the people I want to know can understand.

5. Don’t let the quiet and mellow life lose to the bluff and excitement.

6. Don’t let people get you casually, otherwise you will be easily forgotten.

7. All my self-righteous pride is the light you project into my heart and then reflect back.

8. When did the rain quietly cover the tears, and the memories began to fade in my heart.

9. Memories keep me in the sad past, so that I cannot see the happiness in the present.

10. She cried and begged him, "Don't leave, okay? I won't quarrel with you or make trouble again."

11. Sometimes I feel sad for myself when I look back at my story.

12. I stand in the center of the crossroad, waiting for you to come and take me home.

13. Giving up what you should give up is helplessness, giving up what you shouldn’t give up is incompetence, not giving up what you should give up is ignorance, and not giving up what you shouldn’t give up is persistence.

14. You have always been the one holding on, and you deserve no one to hurt you.

15. Forgetting is also a kind of happiness, and letting go is also a kind of deep love.

16. Our destination is to be forgotten. Maybe I have reached it long ago.

17. I am sure that you will be someone I will never forget, even if your heart already belongs to someone else.

18. That girl is like an aloof rose and never relies on anyone.

19. The place where you can’t get in is in your heart.

20. Time does not make people avoid pain, nor does it make people forget pain, but time makes people get used to pain.

21. Look back occasionally, otherwise you will always be chasing without knowing what you have lost.

22. Life is becoming more and more depressing. You are becoming less and less like yourself. Rose, where are you? You always like things that cannot be grasped.

23. What makes me sadder than losing you is that you never made an effort to be with me.

24. There is an urge not to engage in this relationship, because the mind is wavering and the brain is controlling.

25. When I was sad, no one comforted me, so I learned to talk to myself.

26. Good love is when you see the whole world through one person, bad love is when you give up the world for one person.