Brief introduction of non-text content

Wu Wei, a female writer, spent almost her whole life preparing to write this novel, but just as she was about to start writing, she went crazy.

On the morning of her madness, a reporter called and asked directly, "I heard that you have an illegitimate child?"

Unexpectedly, more than 30 years later, someone, especially a man, humiliated her with this thing that tortured her all her life. And for many years, she even looked forward to such humiliation. Her soul never felt relaxed, not at all.

When he graduated from college, Tachileik, like countless young people, was infatuated with Beijing. After an unsuccessful marriage, he had a legitimate daughter, Chan Yue, and an illegitimate daughter, Feng Dan. This illegitimate daughter born out of "love of literature" made tachileik severely scolded by her husband and was called a whore. As soon as she went out, people spit behind her back, threw stones, and even took off her shoes and beat her. She was criticized for jumping off a building, and her humiliation was more "scarlet letter" than Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter.

With a suit of blame, tachileik came to the May 7th ultra-leftwing. Unexpectedly, he met Hu, a vice minister who has not been "liberated". After several meetings, Qin Shaoyou's words paid tachileik machinery. After they were transferred back to Beijing, they officially began to communicate.

Hu, the son of a noble family, has been tempered by the blood and fire of the revolution. He has the ability, courage and political morality. He is a talent who only comes out once every 500 years. His marriage is not harmonious, but he maintains the name of "model family". However, this does not prevent him from looking for other women. His policy is to "find a way to make them take the initiative."

Tachileik is Hu's opponent. Under Hu's repeated courtship, Wu Wei really "voluntarily" wrote him a letter, and she wanted a definite answer. Thinking about it, he gave this letter to his wife, Bai Fan, and together with Bai Fan, who is also an old revolutionary, jointly wrote a letter that made Tachileik hold her breath for a year. Wu wondered: Is Hu in the cadre school the same person as Hu who wrote this letter?

When I recovered from the blow of this letter, tachileik suddenly realized that I had to change my position and struggle out of thousands of feet. And this is not easy!

A piece of paper and a pen floated in front of tachileik, as if someone had said to her: write, this is your way.

When mother and Zen Moon fell asleep, tachileik put the chopping board on the kitchen sink, stood in front of the sink, and began to write with a 12 ballpoint pen.

The words written by that pen finally turned into type, and only 100 yuan made tachileik feel as rich as a millionaire. She finally became a writer in that humiliating yard, and she really let go of Hu emotionally.

When Hu saw the novel signed tachileik in the newspaper, he knew it was his tachileik, not someone else's tachileik. Tachileik will always be grateful, even unable to mention her cheating and raising an illegitimate child. I panicked. He felt that he must do something quickly, otherwise it would be late.

Hu sent someone to send the note, tachileik only read half, and knew that he was finished. She didn't know that her suffering, her struggle and the humiliation of mother and daughter couldn't stop Hu's little note. She ran to him in despair. At this time, it's almost ten years since I first saw Hu sitting on the log of the cadre school.

After the meeting, tachileik still writes with peace of mind and lives as usual, but Hu doesn't let tachileik write quietly and live quietly. Tachileik resisted him at a distance and secretly, and also resisted himself. But Hu was moody, and a short message made tachileik feel that he had played with him again. She began to doubt Hu's character.

Hu is very depressed. Has any woman ever treated him like this? Come on, it's just a newspaper that a woman can read. Tachileik's name came into his eyes again, and he knew things were getting worse. He felt a little guilty. Is his desire for tachileik mixed with the satisfaction that filling the first room with her can't give him? He felt hopelessly degraded.

In addition to Hu's fish and geese, a party member boy from the Ministry was also killed. If Hu is facing "Neo-Confucianism in Song and Ming Dynasties", children are facing "An Shi Rebellion". This minister-level cadre who was raped by his subordinates actually needs ability and quality, that is, women do too much. He wanted to hand tachileik over to his command, and said, "House problems and organizational problems can be solved in time ..." So, all the central documents, intrigues between ministers and even scandals in their personal lives were copied and sent to tachileik. He sat at tachileik's house for hours, chatting with colleagues and yelling at them. Tachileik is an eye-opener. It turns out that these great men are no different from small people like her. The difference is that for her, her conscience has been uneasy all her life, and for those people, it is only natural.

Tachileik, who is "morally corrupt", is proud that he has never made an exchange in his life. There are strict boundaries between exchange, loving someone, and even going to bed because I love me, love my dog. In any case, she refused to go to Tong's research group. But Tong still pursued her.

No matter how Hu escapes, there is one fact that he can't escape-that is, after knowing that tachileik can write novels and win literary prizes, his feelings for tachileik have changed. Coupled with the death of the old leader, the reunion of old colleagues, and the petition of villagers in the old areas ... Looking back on his life, Hu felt confused, confused and depressed, and even pessimistic about the future of mankind. He can't find the answer. Stop, stop, stop. At least there is a sincere tachileik. Until now, tachileik has gradually evolved into a positive image in Hu's mind. In Hu Yisheng's confusion, he finally had a reason to go to tachileik to explain many theories.

Although Hu and tachileik couldn't keep in touch for a long time, Hu seemed to know Tong's actions like the back of his hand.

At the sight of Hu, tachileik knew that something serious was about to happen. On a small road by the river leading to the field, they finally embraced. A few days later, in another restaurant, they kissed for the first time. In fact, Hu waited for this kiss ten years ago. Just this kiss, let the battle-hardened, desperate, steel-like Hu swoon. He seems to have returned to his first love, and he is in love as passionately as he is doing underground work. ...

Officialdom is like a battlefield. Unexpectedly, Hu, who was a shoo-in, was defeated in the official career war. A leader who appreciated Hu suddenly turned around and left, Hu crossed the village and lost his shop. After all, Hu was born in a bureaucratic family. At worst, he regarded his official career as the embodiment of his value. Tachileik said, "I love you, not your position." With this in mind, Hu's career is hopeless, but he is happy.

Wu was born in 1937. As soon as the gunfire rang at Lugouqiao, my father Gu Qiushui left their mother and daughter and followed the old staff of the Northeast Army to fight against Japan. Mother Ye Lianzi raised her through hardships, and their sufferings made them inseparable. At this time, Ye Lianzi knew that Tachileik was going to jump into the trap again without guessing. She slapped tachileik for this, and even knelt down with her granddaughter Zen Moon to plead for tachileik. She also called Hu and begged the man four years older than herself to let tachileik go, but Hu made him black and blue. The two men have never met before and hold a grudge against each other. Lotus seeds still have to work hard to save every penny, live a hard life and even sell blood. On the other hand, tachileik did not use the manuscript fee to supplement the poor families of their three daughters. -that tachileik's payment? It's all spent on Hu.

My daughter Zen Moon feels that although her mother has jumped around and changed one man after another, she is still a slave to others in essence. Grandma and mom are slaves of men, who exploit their spirit, body and feelings-can't they see? This is really the bane of their family. This "curse" must be given to her.

White sail solemnly sat down in front of Hu. He knew it was time for a showdown. Bai Fan didn't want Hu to admit it, and even hoped that he would deny it. But he didn't. He just admitted it calmly and gave Bai Fan a counterattack-didn't you have sex with men and women?

If a person changes his mind, it will be difficult for him to do it. For tachileik, Hu has exposed her background despite decades of mutual affection between husband and wife! With a scream, she jumped up and shouted, cried, tore and screamed like a village woman, throwing a cup of hot tea in his face. "No, you have to find an organization!" He said, and went out. Hu hurriedly knelt down and begged for mercy. Bai Fan was so angry that he raised his hand and drew a bow on Hu's face, which actually slapped him six times. Later, Hu suffered a massive myocardial infarction and went to the emergency room of the hospital.

Hu's downfall not only made his opponents breathe a sigh of relief, but also made the relevant departments breathe a sigh of relief in the difficult personnel balance. The indecisive personnel arrangement looks smooth and clear.

Hu, whose condition has improved, finally asked tachileik to go to the hospital. Tachileik had to take risks, but the last thing he wanted to hear was the word "miss you". During this period, Bai Fan arrived and fought against tachileik. Tachileik just wanted nonsense to say "I gave it to her", but Hu dared not say a word. -Is he still a man? Bai Fan launched the "White Fan Marriage Protection Group" composed of 38 wives to fight for the protection of Bai Fan.

Hu was very sad when he learned that tachileik, a lonely woman, was fighting with a large group of people to defend him behind Bai Fan. It was Bai Fan who drove him to no way back. He formally sued and divorced Bai Fan. This last desperate move touched tachileik again.

However, during the trial, it was Hu's masks that hurt tachileik the most, and the contrast was shocking. He actually kept a letter written with Bai Fan in his hand, which became the most powerful shell to attack Tachileik. When Bai Fan was celebrating Hu's "rehabilitation" for his illegitimate child, she didn't even know that Hu had appealed to the central leaders and would never turn over from now on.

This siege, which lasted for many years and used extreme means and figures, eroded tachileik's love for Hu bit by bit like strong acid. Her love for Hu gradually faded in the repeated struggles and the cleansing of trafficking. Like Arthur in The Gadfly, she looked up for a long time in front of the statue of the god she once believed in, and then smashed it with a hammer. Speaking of the wedding date, Tachileik said, "Can we live together without getting married?" Hu Chenbing broke his mouth and scolded, "No wonder people say you are a bad woman. Aren't you fooling me? " ……"

Tachileik really wants to say to him: If you are still a minister, if you are still in the prime of life, if there are not so many people bothering you and waiting to see your jokes, I will not hesitate to say to you: I don't want to marry you!

However, why is Wu too lazy to say? She is tired.

Nonsense: "If you don't marry me, I will commit suicide."

She can't break her word. Besides, Hu almost died for it! Then you have to feel sorry for yourself. In order to register marriage, tachileik asked his mother Ye Lianzi for a household registration book. He just said, "Mom, I'm getting married", and then he cried with Ye Lianzi in his arms. ...

The confrontation between Ye Lianzi and Hu ended in a crushing defeat. When tachileik died, she was full of guilt about Ye Lianzi, who had raised her through hard work, and could not extricate herself.

Ever since Hu and tachileik stepped out of the marriage registration office for the first second, Hu's conscience has been uneasy. Although Hu repeatedly accused tachileik of cruel torture to Bai Fan, once she married tachileik, Bai Fan became a loser, and Hu inevitably remembered her various benefits. And he is a person who likes to take it out on others, so he naturally regards tachileik as the initiator of the victim.

And their daughter, Furong, was very friendly to tachilek Zeng before marriage, but it became the fuse of their many quarrels-tachilek Zeng, after all, was the woman who took his father away from his mother.

Wu Wei wants to write and earn money to support his family. Hu never gives her a salary, but he wants to provide him with a high-grade life for his daughter to go to Zen college. ...

On one occasion, tachileik accompanied Hu to the hospital for treatment. Without greeting tachileik, Hu gave the key to their home to Furong and her lover. Tachileik asked the nanny to go back and cook chicken soup for Hu. The two of them were in bed and were beaten by the nanny. From then on, Furong and Tachileik were at odds. When I came home from the hospital, I saw tachileik's photo turned upside down and the wine bottle shattered on the ground. Even the condoms used by Furong and her lover are scattered on the toilet counter, and the stains of love are printed on the sheets and the cover of the lounge chair ... The nanny also left a rake: "Aunt, I can't serve this." Tachileik had to pick up condoms one by one, then roll up the sheets and throw away the towels. Unexpectedly, Hu flew into a rage and said to Tachileik with a sour face, "It seems that you have never seen a man's semen" ... Tachileik understood that people didn't treat themselves as people at all, just concubines.

Their marriage, from the beginning, stayed in the prelude of an opera and could not enter the stage of drama. After marriage, Hu never got the lingering feeling he expected from her. She can only describe the situation in Qi Mei as a quality service. Tachileik thinks that her absolute loyalty can equal and replace women's love and sex for men, and her performance in bed makes it more and more difficult for yue hu to entertain himself. Hu didn't understand that what he bought with heroic sacrifice and painstaking efforts was a similar replica of Bai Fan in his later years. In a quarrel shortly after marriage, Hu unexpectedly said, "Do you know what others say about you? To say that you are a rotten woman and that I married a rotten woman like you is taken in by you. But how could I be possessed and marry you? "-As easy as blowing off dust, I shot tachileik.

Tachileik doesn't understand that when men stop doting on a woman, their past affairs will always be their killer weapon. Although Hu can't have two wives at the same time in law, in real life, he is comfortable between them. With the recovery of Bai Fan and his old life in the future, everything destroyed by tachileik when he was in love was also picked up by him. The combination with tachileik was redefined by him as a betrayal of his decades of cultivation and class.

Tachileik is heartbroken for the man he has loved for so many years and for himself.

Hu asked for divorce many times, even to the point of kowtowing, saying that the whole family, old and young, should thank her for her great kindness, but tachileik just disagreed.

Just before Hu decided to divorce tachileik, he made good use of it and let tachileik type his masterpiece on the computer. Tachileik is very disapproving of this masterpiece. In her view, it is just a collection of papers published by many researchers, and there is nothing new. But Hu is very serious. He wants tachileik to take it abroad and publish it in the name of tachileik, a foreign son-in-law and Zen master. She will go abroad early the next morning, and her work will not end until late at night. When she handed Hu the floppy disk, he didn't answer it. He quickly found a pair of gloves to put on, and then took the floppy disk.

It turned out that he was afraid of leaving fingerprints! Tachileik laughed hysterically: "Why didn't you think I would wear a pair of gloves? ..... "On the plane, she broke the floppy disk and threw it into a paper bag, ready to vomit on the plane.

Liberated, tachileik feel liberated. She kept laughing, laughing more carefree. ...

On the day tachileik finally agreed to divorce, they stopped quarreling, as beautiful as when they were in love. This love affair, which began at the age of 33, is vigorous. Now tachileik is 60 years old. 60-year-old tachileik is nothing but bagasse vomited on the ground. Less than a month after the divorce, Hu and Bai Fan remarried. However, after living with Tachileik for 10 years, Hu has not fully adapted to Bai Fan, and he is comfortable between these two women. You can't blame her for the ruthlessness of Bai Fan. She has been half-hearted to this man all her life.

I don't know if it's a coincidence, but Hu came again the day Lianzi died. Tachileik looked at him, but seemed to see Gu Qiushui, who had already abandoned their mother and daughter, and could not help but blurt out, "Dad." Then, she was very peaceful and calmly transitioned to a state where she could not say anything and didn't know anyone. She was sent to a mental hospital.

One day, tachileik died.

The sky is high and the clouds are light, and summer has passed.

The tree is still green, but tachileik is leaving.

This is death.

Just as the tide receded from the beach, so did her soul.

Like a fish swimming back to the sea, the beginning of life.

Like the last chord on a violin, it weakens and disappears silently.

People sorted out her belongings, but they didn't find the phone number or address of a relative or friend, nor did they find anything related to words. This man who has been attached to writing for decades is completely dead with writing.

When was this finished?

Is she crazy?

This woman, who gave birth to many children, whether born in or out of wedlock, completely left this world and flatly refused the last pity or forgiveness of this world.

Is there a deeper hatred for the world than this hatred?