Which one has all the lines in Huang Hong's sketch?

Screenwriters: Huang Hong and Jiao Naiji

Director: Zhao Keming

Performance: Hou

(Based on Liu Jinyun's mini-novel)

Dialogue # 1:

Huang Hong: Huh? Spades k!

Hou Yuewen: A of hearts! ?

Huang Hong: Old classmate!

Hou Yuewen: Old classmates, old classmates.

Huang Hong: Come on, come on. .......

Hou Yuewen: Did you advertise Friends?

Huang Hong: Yes, it's me!

Hou Yuewen: Oh, it's still a childhood problem. It's too noisy.

Huang Hong: I'm busy, so you can join in the fun. So many people didn't listen to this notice, but you came. Come, sit down!

Hou Yuewen: Why?

Huang Hong: Go home! What about you?

Hou Yuewen: Go home! What are you doing now?

Huang Hong: Oh, small shopping! (After exchanging business cards) Oh, you became an old classmate as a reporter?

Hou Yuewen: Well, just so-so. As soon as I saw you, I remembered when we were young. When I was a child, 54 students in our class and 54 playing cards became famous.

Huang Hong: That's a peach!

Hou Yuewen: Later, I ... er, later I heard that you were in love with that grass flower Q ..

Huang Hong: Will she like me? Let the diamond j tick off. Any news from spades 8?

Hou Yuewen: Spades 8 did business and beat sandals in Vietnam, making a fortune! How about Hearts 3?

Huang Hong: I am a soldier. I just put three hearts on my shoulder, Colonel!

Hou Yuewen: Huh? Where is the king of our class?

Huang Hong: You said that was the vice president.

Hou Yuewen: Yes, yes, yes!

Huang Hong: I stayed at school as a teacher, and now I teach my son!

Dialogue 2:

Huang Hong: Well, let's shake hands twice and get back the feeling of the past?

Hou Yuewen: OK! Poker! Poker!

Huang Hong: Oh, no!

Hou Yuewen: How to play?

Huang Hong: Find something to replace it. .......

Hou Yuewen: What can I do?

Huang Hong: Well, play with your business card!

Hou Yuewen: Is that all right?

Huang Hong: When I was young, there was no poker. Don't we all play with food stamps? Half a catty, two Liang,

Hou Yuewen: A catty is half a catty!

Huang Hong: Local governments are responsible for the whole country!

Hou Yuewen: Just use it!

Huang Hong: Just use it!

Hou Yuewen: Come on, how to play?

Huang Hong: I draw one, you draw one. Flipping is better than controlling. Drink if you lose.

Hou Yuewen: Just like military chess!

Huang Hong: I'll go first: team leader!

Hou Yuewen: Chief, drink!

Huang Hong: (takes a sip and comes back) Boss!

Hou Yuewen: Director, drink!

Huang Hong: (takes another sip) Director! !

Hou Yuewen: Chief, have another drink!

Huang Hong: I don't drink!

Hou Yuewen: What's the matter?

Huang Hong: Your contact level as a reporter is definitely higher than mine!

Hou Yuewen: It's not the level, it's your poor level!

Huang Hong: What do you say? Do you dare to come if we change cards?

Hou Yuewen: I can still beat you!

Huang Hong: Come here?

Hou Yuewen: Come as soon as you come!

(After changing the card ...)

Huang Hong: Er, this card is great. You can eat whatever you want!

Hou Yuewen: Look at this card. Oh, it's a small section chief. It doesn't matter! Look at this: six section chiefs! !

Huang Hong: Six directors! ! How happy I am to manage this!

Hou Yuewen: Look at this: the group leader, section chief and director are all flush!

Huang Hong: The section chief, the director and the director are all on the same train!

Hou Yuewen: I'm really lucky!

Huang Hong: I am a real dragon!

Hou Yuewen: This is the Organization Department, the Personnel Department and the Cadre Department. How smooth our administrative relationship is!

Huang Hong: The production department, sales office and foreign trade bureau produce and sell through one train, and directly enter the international market!

.......

Hou Yuewen: Don't be busy. Look at this: bombs, four twos!

Huang Hong: Where did you get four 2s?

Hou Yuewen: These four are deputies, that is, second in command, so they are called four two!

Huang Hong: Wait a minute, wait a minute, if you want to say so, then deal with it! Four heavenly kings! !

Hou Yuewen: Four what kings?

Huang Hong: Selling beef noodles!

Hou Yuewen: Huh? Beef noodle king?

Huang Hong: It is all over the street. We buyers eat this most affordable!

Dialogue 3:

Huang Hong: Now that you gave me your business card, I will give it to you. There are nine managers in ten business cards, and only one assistant manager is left. ..... Let me start with a small one: Assistant Manager.

Hou Yuewen: Responsible, manager!

Huang Hong: Responsible, General Manager!

Hou Yuewen: Come on, Chairman! !

Huang Hong: Take charge, Minister!

Hou Yuewen: Do you care about ..............., your secretary or my chairman?

Huang Hong: Ah, this is the female secretary! To some extent, a female secretary can be the chairman's home!

Hou Yuewen: OK, OK, er, look carefully, old classmate. My chairman is also a woman and won't be fooled by you! Drink it! !

Huang Hong: Then I'll change to a male secretary!

Hou Yuewen: Hmm ... No! Dead card landing! Drink it! Drink it!

Huang Hong: Wait a minute! I will give you a big one! The title alone is a lock.

Hou Yuewen: Go ahead!

Huang Hong: Nominal Consultant of Huaxia Co., Ltd., Nominal Manager of Shenzhou Unlimited Co., Ltd., Nominal Director of United Multinational Corporation, Nominal Director of Universal Pictures International. .......

Hou Yuewen: No study, no study. Which unit does he work in?

Huang Hong: Say something: 6785423, please call Aunt Liu in Hutong.

Hou Yuewen: Do you use the phone much? ! What is this mess? ! You are all empty and deceptive. Drink it!

Conversation #4:

Huang Hong: You come, I will take care of you!

Hou Yuewen: A famous actor!

Huang Hong: A tabloid reporter!

Hou Yuewen: A little ... Does this tabloid reporter care about famous actors?

Huang Hong: I specialize in making up erotic news with you. Today I say you are having an affair, tomorrow I say you want a divorce, and the day after tomorrow I say you will be notorious if a third party intervenes in a few days! Drink it!

Hou Yuewen: I drink, I drink, okay, look at this: movie star!

Huang Hong: TV star!

Hou Yuewen: Well, I can't!

Huang Hong: How can I watch movies now? Everyone is watching TV at home! No matter how bad your performance is, get familiar with it first!

Hou Yuewen: Don't worry, don't worry, it's easier said than done. Take care of you: a crosstalk performer! Not only familiar face, but also love!

Huang Hong: Come on, sketch actor! Now crosstalk obviously can't be a sketch!

Hou Yuewen: Don't worry, don't worry, take care of you: a famous Peking Opera performer, a first-class actor, with a monthly salary of more than 300 yuan!

Huang Hong: Isn't it more than 300 yuan? Pop star, the appearance fee is 30 thousand

Hou Yuewen: Well, I can't. Beijing opera is the quintessence of China. Every move and style you make is real kung fu. .......

Huang Hong: It's useless, it's useless! Haven't you heard, ten years of work under the stage is not as good as three minutes for a singer and an appearance fee of 30 thousand!

Hou Yuewen: Don't worry, if you say so, you are in charge! Third-rate singers from Hong Kong and Taiwan, the appearance fee is 500,000! ! !

Huang Hong: Hmm! (Huang Hong falls off the chair) How much is it?

Hou Yuewen: 500,000!

Huang Hong: This has already caught up with the annual output value of our factory for half a year. How's this? ! !

Hou Yuewen: This is the price of the benefit performance!

Huang Hong: Wait a minute, wait a minute! I can't believe it. I can't control him! Let him take so much money, Commissioner of Inland Revenue! ! ! No matter how much money you earn, you have to pay taxes according to the regulations. Can't pay less. Drink it!

Conversation #5:

Hou Yuewen: Come on! Look at this: factory director!

Huang Hong: Fake factory director!

Hou Yuewen: Can this fake be true?

Huang Hong: No matter how good this medicine is, I used your trademark to produce counterfeit drugs twice, and you immediately reversed the brand!

Hou Yuewen: In that case, you: photographer!

Huang Hong: Can your photographer handle my fake factory director?

Hou Yuewen: The quality is 10,000 miles, and I will give you a thorough exposure to let you at that time! Drink it!

Huang Hong: Then I'll drink. I'll give you a unique one: the monk.

Hou Yuewen: OK, Japanese monk.

Huang Hong: These are monks. Why do you care about me?

Hou Yuewen: Foreign monks can recite scriptures!

Huang Hong: This is called sophistry. I saw you.

Hou Yuewen: It's called studying, old classmate. You didn't do well in school at that time, and you copied my examination paper every day!

Huang Hong: You are so heartless. Did I copy it for nothing? I didn't avenge you when you were beaten. ! This man is really!

Hou Yuewen: After you avenge me, I have to take someone else to see a doctor!

Huang Hong: To see a doctor.

Hou Yuewen: Two doctors.

Huang Hong: Vet!

Hou Yuewen: A wild animal. Can a veterinarian take care of two doctors in ...............?

Huang Hong: Now animals are more expensive than people. Our neighbor has a puppy, and he was wearing red underwear the other day. I asked what that meant, and he said this year was its animal year!

Hou Yuewen: No, no, don't talk nonsense. This year is my animal year. Stop talking nonsense!

Huang Hong: Yes! This year is your animal year and also its animal year. What are you arguing with it? You are several laps older than it!

(Hou Wenyao will hit Huang Hong when he jumps up)

Hou Yuewen: You're talking nonsense again! ! !

Huang Hong: I tell you, it costs thousands of dollars to do a CT scan for this dog!

Hou Yuewen: Oh, I'm really willing to spend money!

Huang Hong: Of course, I am willing to give up. I wrote his father-in-law's name for reimbursement!

Hou Yuewen: Can this be reported?

Huang Hong: What a great move! Stick a "tinea" on the back of the "dog" and say that the father-in-law has "tinea on the dog's skin", report it!

Conversation #6:

Hou Yuewen: Get out!

Huang Hong: President of City Bank!

Hou Yuewen: Oh, shit! Director of public security bureau!

Huang Hong: This is not a system. Can you manage me?

Hou Yuewen: I'm telling you, this president, he went in and took bribes. Also, this one just now, if he doesn't change it, sooner or later he will become the public security bureau chief! Drink it!

Huang Hong: This wine is very delicious! ! ! ..... athletes!

Hou Yuewen: Big star!

Huang Hong: Coach!

Hou Yuewen: Foreign coach!

Huang Hong: Foreign ... You are a foreign teacher, who cares about my coach China?

Hou Yuewen: Foreign coaches are capable!

Huang Hong: Capable? Wait a minute, it seems that this one can't get out: China native coach Ma Jiajun has broken the world record in a row! ! ! ..... Come on, you're in charge!

Hou Yuewen: OK, don't worry, I'll take care of you: foreign journalists, check your doping.

Huang Hong: Put it away! ! ! As soon as you mention this, I get angry with my old classmates.

Hou Yuewen: What's the matter?

Huang Hong: When foreigners won the championship, did they say anything? Did China people take stimulants when they won the championship? Tell them that Ma Jiajun didn't make the doping, but Ma Jiajun gave China/KLOC-0.2 billion people and even China people all over the world a shot of doping. Our China Malik Jiajun will run in the forefront of the world one day!

Hou Yuewen: Old classmate, it's time to write articles!

Huang Hong: What topic?

Hou Yuewen: The title of the article is: A little hand, a big social stage.

Huang Hong: You are ugly at the end of your life, who knows! hahahaha .......