What should I do if my child who has just entered puberty loves to act cool and wants to lose weight without eating at night?

When adolescent boys begin to display various behaviors such as a love for beauty and a love for being cool, how should parents handle themselves and guide them?

Case:

Yangyang’s mother has served delicious food and is preparing for dinner. "Yangyang, the teacher said you refused to participate in the outdoor activities organized by the school. What's going on?" Yangyang came out of the room, shaking his head and waving his hands as he walked: "I won't participate. I haven't participated in it recently." Get ready."

"The older you get, the less sensible you are. You used to rush to participate in any activities at school. Now it's time to eat. Go to your room and call your dad." Mom cleared the table and put it away. meal.

"Dad, we're out for dinner! Mom, peel me an apple. I won't eat dinner. My cousin said he wants to lose weight, so he won't be able to eat at night." He stood while talking. Look at your whole body in front of the mirror.

"How can a growing child not eat? Don't listen to your cousin's nonsense and wash your hands quickly!" Dad came out of the room and ordered...

Yang Yang is 11 years old. He used to have a cheerful personality and was a sweet boy, but recently he has always paid great attention to his external image. He also likes to waddle when walking and learns hip-hop moves to look cool. Yangyang also asked her mother about the increasingly obvious physiological phenomena of her child's adolescence, but Yangyang's mother found it difficult to answer. She just said that she had grown up and didn't know how to guide and educate her children on this issue.

Case analysis:

First, let’s take a look at the phenomenon of children:

1. Children’s youthful growth cannot be stopped

Regardless of whether children Both physiologically and physically he is growing up. As parents, we cannot stop him. His body will continue to secrete hormones and his energy will continue to increase. Children in this period are full of strength and have a new understanding of the things and people around them. They will once again become curious or explore these things, especially their persistent pursuit of the opposite sex.

2. Showing individuality is just a manifestation of attracting the opposite sex

In order to make the opposite sex pay attention to him and find a sense of presence in front of the opposite sex, he constantly wants to make himself more individual and more attractive. He has a unique character charm, so he began to pay attention to his own image and his dressing. He even wanted to act cool and walk relatively handsomely. In fact, these are normal manifestations. The body has accumulated so much energy that it must be excreted, otherwise it will be suffocated. However, these cannot yet form a pattern in the child's logical thinking, and he is not sure whether they are useful.

For parents:

1. The child’s growth again brings separation anxiety to the mother.

Seeing that the child is about to grow into a little man, he He already has his own consciousness to shape his personality charm (of course, maybe the method is not correct, but at least he is doing it.) to attract the opposite sex. The mother will lose her sense of security and crisis. She hopes that her child will always be that innocent little boy, and then he will only revolve around his parents every day. In the children's eyes, only the parents are the biggest. In fact, this is unrealistic.

As parents, our love is the love of separation. When a child separates from our body, it is a process; when the child struggles out of our arms and walks on his own, it is also a process; now that the child is in adolescence, his eyes He sees more of the world and more people. He needs to be independent, need to be recognized by the opposite sex, and be recognized by people other than parents and teachers. This means that children are preparing for their adulthood and to enter society independently. Don't worry, this is our mission!

2. Affirm the child’s physiological characteristics and survive adolescence smoothly

When we understand that children have to grow up, have to be independent, and have to enter society in the future to become truly independent. As an individual, please put down your anxieties and insecurities, face your children correctly, and help your children go through adolescence smoothly.

Therefore, we parents must first have a correct attitude, be calm and calm, and affirm and praise the iconic characteristics of our children's adulthood. Don't let your children have psychological pressure on their physical characteristics.

3. Correctly understand all behaviors and thoughts of the opposite sex in adolescence, and avoid moral kidnapping

The reason for children to talk to their mothers about their physiological reactions is because mothers are the most trustworthy of the opposite sex. , the safest individual, will not laugh at him or despise him. This shows how important our opinions are to children, so they must be honest and face them calmly, and cannot cover up or deal with them vaguely.

We must respect normal physiological functions, which is the most sacred thing for human reproduction. Respect it, respect life, and respect nature. Many parents laugh at their children because their children have admiration for girls, and their language is sarcastic and contemptuous. Children will also develop a sense of shame because of this, and will slowly suppress their emotions. Over time, they will become silent, have weird personalities, and behave surly.

We must guide our children. This is just a necessary process like a turning point in life. Its arrival will bring you a lot of distress. It doesn’t matter. We keep a sunny and confident heart and shape our own. Youth dream!

I don’t know if you netizens have any advice on how to guide adolescent children. Please speak up. Thank you, I am Sister Xiang!