Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - I was so excited to wear this dress last night that I masturbated. I don't know what happened.
I was so excited to wear this dress last night that I masturbated. I don't know what happened.
When I was in the second grade of junior high school, I opened Pandora's box, and English wanted to flourish. To what extent? Go to the toilet once a day, sometimes even three times a day. Finally, the genitals were bruised and bleeding. Toilet is the dirtiest place, where I lost the most precious thing in my life and absorbed the dirtiest air. Go home after studying at night, take out the yellow color video tape hidden in the living room and enjoy it slowly while your family is asleep. Don't pass it to Ying after reading it. Sometimes I just watch English in the living room and get it all over the floor. Self-study at night is very tiring, and it will be very tiring to go back. As a result, my academic performance has never improved. Sometimes I study late into the night, but the efficiency is very poor. Although I was only a junior high school student at that time, I was completely possessed by Xie. When I see a woman's breasts or nude, I will say it's English.
In high school, I know nothing about vigilance. I often tell some dirty jokes to my classmates, which I call "humor". I don't know how many students have been damaged, so I took some dirty CDs of ying to the dormitory to exchange with other students with the same hobbies. I'm very close to my independent classmates in Xie Ying, but I just can't get together with my classmates with good moral character and good grades. There was a video room next to the high school. The boss is a woman. She aimed at us teenagers who want to make a fortune and bought a lot of dirty CDs. I didn't dare to see it at that time, but at the instigation of a few bad friends, I went to Ying's possession, which was out of control almost every week. Sometimes skip class to watch. Once I went by bike with a bad friend. When I left the school gate, my knee hit the school gate and was badly hit, but I was full of desire and dragged my legs, and the pain was unbearable. Sometimes I have to wait in line when I meet other students. The boss made a lot of money from our high school students.
Although there are several classes in high school, I can still find friends with the same bad taste from the classes. In the dormitory, a yellow picture book can be circulated many times. In those bookstores where obscene books and periodicals are hidden, there is always a photo of me "studying hard" in a dark environment, and my eyes will be nearsighted immediately. At this time, my hand was still shining, and stones appeared in my body. It hurt so much that I got hemorrhoids and was cut by a barefoot doctor. For a few days, the stool was full of blood, but it was still in my hands when I was sick. Poor sleep quality. Hand Ying is a compulsory course for me before going to bed. Sometimes I shake so badly in bed that others can't sleep. I also use other people's towels to wipe dirt.
Senior three, mental state is almost exhausted. I have to rely on health care products to refresh myself and resist fatigue. On the night of the college entrance examination, I was admitted to a second-rate university. I don't think it's a problem to get into a first-class university if you can't get into the British Association. But Xie Ying is like a bleeding artery, which consumes a lot of my blessings. I didn't have the energy to go back to school at that time, so I went to two schools.
University is a paradise of depravity, and many honest middle school students have fallen in university. Staying up late playing games and watching porn movies, the actress's names were memorized. If high school is still secretly watching or talking, then when it comes to college, it must be open. The sound of porn in the dormitory is so loud that the whole building can hear it. A group of people gathered around the computer, staring and commenting. As for me, I am one of the pioneers. There was no computer in high school before, so I needed to go into the video hall outside. Now you can see it everywhere in internet cafes. Bosses who know the needs of college students also download them in advance and make them public at night.
It makes sense to see an article written by someone called "It is not difficult for college students to find a job, but it is difficult to leave their posts". College students are ignorant on campus, watching porn movies, playing games, living together unmarried, pursuing small happiness, and even having an abortion, just to find a good job after graduation? I am one of them. At the beginning of graduation year, my skin was allergic and covered with red pimples. I was killed by a skin specialist hospital, and spent nearly 10,000 yuan, but I was not cured. The first half of the year is the key moment for me to graduate and find a job, but I can only stay in the ward and waste my time. When I left school after graduation, hemorrhoids recurred. As a result, others went to work happily, and I stayed in the hospital for surgery. That year was terrible. Failure in the postgraduate entrance examination and failure in the civil service examination are problems all over the body. It was not until after graduation that my body returned to normal after the summer vacation. But looking for a job at this time, cauliflower is already cold.
No way, I entrusted the leadership of a provincial unit and found a relationship. You can only practice in one unit. The person in charge of that unit clearly told me that it is impossible to stay in their unit with my school and education. As a result, I went out to look for a job less than a month after my internship. My resume was posted on the internet, and the regular unit didn't read it at all. The insurance company took aim at me instead and let me try it out. I went with joy, thinking it was a good job, but I ended up selling insurance. I have always been dirty and introverted, and I am not good at words. How to sell insurance? I haven't earned a penny for months, and I have to ask my family for living expenses. It is not easy for my parents to make money. I want to support myself after graduation. I didn't expect the university to be worse than a migrant worker who didn't graduate from primary school. Although the education is low, it is still powerful. As for me, my body, which has been worn out by the British Association for many years, needs strength but has no strength, and needs ability but has no ability. Running around the city in the scorching sun, knocking on doors one after another to sell insurance, being scolded and looked down upon, but I can't sell insurance. I was disheartened and had to quit my job and go home.
This year, in the face of unbearable fate, I couldn't help thinking about my life. Once on the Internet, I came across Xie Ying. I saw experiences similar to mine on the Internet, such as waking me up at dusk. It is He Ying who caused my present situation. From then on, I tried to avoid Xie Ying. Although there are occasional repetitions, it is a good start after all. I took out all the videos and DVDs at home and destroyed them.
Later, I gave up the traditional culture of Xie Ying. Incredibly, a man who has a history of nearly ten years in Xie Ying quit when he says he will, and he is becoming more and more diligent. In the second year of graduation, I still found a job at a loss, but in the third year of continuous improvement, I found a satisfactory job, and my health was much better, and I was no longer suffering from illness. From then on, hold your head high and be a man. Now I am typing these words, and I feel that I used to be a ghost, but now I am a person.
Nowadays, the Internet, TV, newspapers, magazines and other media promote the word "Qing", and everything should be lace or colored. There are no eggs under the nest. Now look at people. People are not like people, ghosts are not like ghosts, ugliness is beauty, and they are willing to fall. Women spend thousands or tens of thousands of dollars on fancy clothes for beauty and plastic surgery. In order to increase their so-called charm, they go to the streets to improve their return rate, let men chase them and satisfy their poor vanity. Men, if they have money, go whoring, keep mistresses, and use money to buy women's bodies to vent their desires, even as the pursuit of life; Have the right to use power to play with female xing and show off how many women you have outside. ...
As an experienced person, I tell you, if you want to quit evil English, don't even look at sexy things, often study traditional culture, read sage books and practice internal skills, you will definitely quit, jump into the fire pit of Youqing and live a pure life by yourself.
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