Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - A thrilling trip to Africa (1)

A thrilling trip to Africa (1)

Lao Liu is two years older than me. She's my client. I sat on the sofa in her office drinking tea. I heard her call her clients in Africa with an authentic Jiaodong Peninsula accent. ...

"I said Karam, at eleven o'clock in the evening on the 3rd, my sister and I got off the plane at Guinea Capital Airport. Pick us up at the airport then, don't forget! "

I don't know how to answer the other end of the phone. I was scared out in a cold sweat after Lao Liu hung up the phone. Can this foreigner understand the dialect of Jiaozhou Peninsula? It's amazing!

I said uneasily to Lao Liu, "I'll tell Karam again in English. Can he understand what you just said to him? "

"Why don't you understand? He has been in our factory for more than two months and can speak Chinese. "

Although I am worried, I can't say much. After all, Carla is a client of Lao Liu, and I don't know him well or well. This trip to Africa is to inspect the market, and Lao Liu will ask for compensation by the way.

From Guangzhou airport, we embarked on a flight to Dubai, United Arab Emirates, and then transferred from Dubai to Conakry, the capital of Guinea, West Africa. Because of the long journey and the long flight time, my feet are swollen like steamed bread, and I barely put my feet in after taking off my shoes for a long time.

At eleven o'clock on the night of the 3rd, the plane finally arrived at Conakry Airport, the capital of Guinea, on time. When we walked out of the door of the plane, a heat wave came on us, and the air was mixed with humidity and fishy smell.

Down the spiral staircase, four or five black people surrounded me. Black skin is like a black night curtain. Fortunately, there are lights at the airport. If there were no light, I wouldn't see them or bump into them. They didn't understand a word they said to us.

Because it is a French colony and speaks French, a black man reached out and grabbed my suitcase, then counted the money with his thumb between his forefinger and middle finger and said, "Qian Qian." (money, money)

I was dumbfounded by their reckless behavior. I guess they earned some tips by carrying luggage for passengers. Get your luggage back and leave quickly, feeling a little scared.

Lao Liu and I looked around for Karam. Gradually, all the passengers left, leaving only two passengers in the empty airport. I didn't see Karam who came to meet us. I knew something was going to happen, and I had a hunch that he wouldn't pick us up.

Liu dialed the phone of Karam in a panic, but the phone couldn't get through and was turned off. At this time, a group of men in black shouted and surrounded us. Lao Liu got a fright. He took my hand in a panic and said tearfully, "Let's run and leave the airport. It's over. Scared me to death. What can I do? "

"Don't be afraid, be calm. We in China are strong, and so are women in China. We can't cry in front of them and show fear. " I held Liu's hand tightly and gave her firm strength.

"We can't go anywhere tonight. It's safer here at the airport. They can't do anything to us We are not familiar with the road outside, and the house number is also French. We can't understand. Walking out of the airport is a dead end. "

I waved my hand in English: "Go? Going? Get out, "please go away and disperse the black people who are asking for money around us.

Lao Liu and I sat on the stone foundation of Airport Road. She wiped her tears silently. At this time, it was already midnight. I comforted her and said, "It's okay. If it's a big deal, I'll fly back. " By the way, you were here last year. Do you know any other clients? Do you have their phone numbers? "

She woke up from a dream with a smile on her face: "Yes, there is a businessman who cooperates with Karam. Why don't I remember? " I wonder if the phone number is still there. "She took out the phone book and looked up the phone number. There are several foreigners' names, and I don't know which one. Pass it to me and let me try: "Go ahead, I can't make a fool of myself again."

I took the phone book and dialed several phone numbers, none of which belonged to the other party. Disappointed, Lao Liu flipped through the phone book and pointed to the number in the phone book: "Try this number again."

"hello? Is it? What about you? jef?” (hello! Are you Jeff? )

"yes." (Yes)

At this moment, I jumped for joy. Then I heard the chatter on the phone, but I didn't understand a word. I was so excited that I suddenly fell into the ditch.

I slowly jumped up word by word: "Du? _ You? _ talk? _ English? " Do you speak English?

The other party replied: "Small." (a little)

"Me? From where? China, ma 'am? Liu, "(I am Ms. Liu from China)

Oh, ok. (Oh, ok)

Now, please? Coming? Here? That? The airport, okay? Would you please come to the airport now?

Okay, what? Name? That? Airport? Ok, what's the name of the airport?

Conakry. (Conakry), I asked, "What? Time? Coming? Here? " When will you come? )

Jeff replied, "About what? One? Hours. " (about an hour)

Okay, thanks? You! (OK, thanks)

An hour later, in front of our eyes, a red car similar to Li Xia came slowly and stopped in front of us. Two middle-aged men got off the car. Liu recognized Jeff at a glance, and the other was his brother Louis. They embraced happily.

Finally, I landed. I don't have to sleep at the airport. I got in their car and went straight ahead. The car was ringing everywhere, except the horn, and it went to their home with a bang.

After about an hour's drive, the car stopped in front of a small red house. The yard is very clean, surrounded by all kinds of flowers and trees. The surrounding house yard feels like a rich area in the local area, and the environment is not bad.

Driven by the sense of self-protection, I looked like a detective when I came to this house. I observed every room and saw a boy about ten years old, alone in a room, sleeping on a board.

I looked in every room and there was no one else. I turned to Jeff and asked, "You? Wife? " What about your wife? )

Jeff pulled a hand through his neck and made a "scratch" sound.

More specifically, it turned out that his wife went to Kotodiva to visit a pair of children studying there, and was killed by anti-government forces in a civil war.

We walked into the master bedroom, and there was a picture of a beautiful African lady on the bedside table. This is Jeff's wife.

Liu and I looked at each other and began to feel a little uneasy. We were just out of danger with Liu when the sheep fell into the tiger's mouth. Two women have just fallen into the hands of two bachelors, and we all want to die.

I asked Jeff if there was a gunman here. Is it safe? He opened the drawer of the cupboard and asked me if it was this one. I saw a pistol in it.

He was about to reach for the pistol, but I quickly withdrew his hand and closed the drawer. I have my back against the drawer, occupying a powerful position, and the gun is under my control.

At this time, Liu was scared out in a cold sweat and exclaimed, "Mom, do they still have guns?" Scared, scared to death! Come on, do something, we won't have an accident, will we? "

This scene was unprecedented in China, which made Liu dumbfounded. To tell the truth, I'm scared, too, but we can't all turn into mud and be pushed around. If Jeff and his brother point a gun at us and take our money and sex, no one will know even if they die there.

Seeing Liu who is tall and fat, a tiger can kill her. At this time, she turned into a paper tiger, chubby figure, turned out to be puffy, sitting in front of the bed with a frightened face.

I pointed to the door and asked Jeff, "That? Door, key? " Where is the door key? )

I asked him: "Take out the key in his pants pocket and ask me: Yes? This? " (Is this it? )

"Yes," (Yes)

I didn't give him a chance to respond. I grabbed the key from him.

By the time he reacted, I had pushed him to the door with both hands: "Please? What about you? Going? Where to? Go to sleep, now. (You go to sleep now)

I quickly closed the door and locked it. I can finally sleep in peace. Lao Liu repeatedly praised: "Thanks to your accompanying me, if I come alone, I really don't know if I can go back alive."

When I got up the next morning, I saw Lao Liu and Jeff sitting in the yard, communicating in sign language.

"all right? Good morning! " (Good morning) I greeted them both and said to Lao Liu, "Lao Liu, we must leave here today. It is safe to stay in a hotel. "

"Where is the hotel? We don't know anyone. " Liu twisted his neck and glanced around.

I stood up from the stool. "Call Karam to see if his cell phone is on?"

"The phone is connected and no one answers." Liu looked up at me.

I turned to talk to Jeff. We are going to stay in a hotel and ask him to call Karam. Jeff spread out his hands and said, "No". After talking for a long time, I just didn't agree. He means I brought you two here. You don't want to get in touch with others. You live in my house. You are my client and can only do business with me.

"It's in trouble. If I don't stay in a hotel, I'm not practical. Just in case. "

No, I turned into the house, pulled out my suitcase and said to Jeff, "Tex. I'm going to the hotel. " (I took a taxi to the hotel)

Jeff believed it. He was a little anxious. Actually, where did I call? Look at the environment around him, it doesn't look like a taxi.

I said to Jeff, "Please? What about you? Telephone? Call Karam, okay? Can you call Karam?

He had to obediently dialed the telephone of Karam, explained the situation to Karam, and asked Karam to meet us. After hanging up the phone, we sent some gifts to Jeff to show our gratitude.

In less than an hour, Karam happily drove us away. It turned out that Liu called Karam at home and asked him to meet us at the airport. Karam has no idea.

After settling down in the hotel, Karam took us to the largest wholesale market in West Africa. Although the market facilities are rudimentary and backward, we are dumbfounded by its busyness and passenger flow. Most of all kinds of goods come from China.

When the container is docked, big merchants buy the whole container, and some people carve up a container. Small vendors generally sell in stalls and shops, selling heads.

Karam took us to visit his shop, which attracted the envious eyes of many of his friends. They will be honored to do business and make friends with China people.

China's culture is also infiltrating into Africa, and their college students are honored to study in the Confucius Institute, which represents the future development opportunities to participate in exchanges and study with China, economic and trade cooperation and so on.

Walking on the streets of Conakry, children of four or five years old, old people of sixty or seventy years old, and China people with yellow skin will greet you from a distance: "Hello! chine!” As a China people, we feel extremely proud!