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Diary of a madman, white light

Diary of a madman

A gentleman, Kun Zhong, whose real name is Yin Jin, was a good friend in middle school. After years of separation, the news gradually disappeared. I occasionally heard of a serious illness the other day; When you go back to your hometown to visit, you will only meet one person, saying that the brother of the sick person is also. The old gentleman came all the way to see you, but he has recovered. He went to a place where he stood by and watched. Because I laughed, I published two diaries with the symptoms of the day. I might as well give them to my old friend. After reading it, I realized that I was suffering from "persecution mania" and so on. The language is quite incoherent, with many absurd words; It's not the month and date, but the ink font is different, so it's not a temporary handwriting. There are also some people who have a little contact with each other. Today I will summarize one for doctors to study. It is not easy for a word to remember Chinese mistakes; However, although people's names are all villagers, they are unknown to the world and it doesn't matter, but they are also easy to walk. As for the title, I will never change it again. I met on April 2, 1977.

one

Tonight, the moonlight is good.

I haven't seen you for more than thirty years; Seeing you today is very refreshing. Only then did I know that I was dizzy for more than 30 years before; However, you must be very careful. Why else would Zhao's dog look at me?

I feel horrible.

two

There is no moonlight today. I know it's not good. When he went out carefully in the morning, Zhao Guiweng's eyes were strange: he seemed afraid of me and wanted to hurt me. There are seven or eight people whispering about me and smiling at me with their mouths open; I was cold from head to toe until they had arranged everything.

I'm not afraid. I'm still going my way. A group of children in front were also talking about me there; The expression in his eyes was as blue as Zhao Guiweng's. I think I have a grudge against my child, and so does he. I can't help but say loudly, "You tell me!" They just ran away.

I thought: What's my enmity with Zhao Guiweng and the people on the road? Only twenty years ago, I kicked Mr. Gu Jiu's old running script (3), and Mr. Gu Jiu was very unhappy. Although Zhao Guiweng didn't know him, he must have heard the wind and felt very wronged. I agree that people on the road will be right with me. But what about the baby? At that time, they were not born. Why are their eyes strange today? They seem afraid of me and want to hurt me. This really scares me, surprises me and makes me sad.

I see. Their mother taught me this!

three

Can't sleep at night. Everything needs to be studied to understand.

They-some lashed the magistrate of a county, some slapped the gentleman's mouth, some were robbed of their wives by the chief executive, and some were forced to death by the creditors; Their expressions at that time were not so fearful or so fierce as yesterday.

The strangest thing is that the woman in the street beat her son yesterday and said, "Lao Zi! I want to bite you and vent my anger! " He looked at me with his eyes. I was surprised and couldn't hide it; The people with blue faces and fangs all burst into laughter. Chen Laowu dragged me home to catch up.

Dragging me home, my family pretended not to know me; Their faces are the same as others. I locked the door when I entered the study, but now I have closed a chicken and duck. The more I teach this matter, the more I can't guess the details.

A few days ago, the tenants of the prodigal village complained about the famine and told my eldest brother that a villain in their village had been killed by everyone. A few people will cut out his heart and eat it in oil, which will make him more emboldened. I interjected that both the tenant and the eldest brother looked at me. I just learned today that their eyes are exactly the same as those outside.

Come to think of it, I am cold from head to toe.

If they can eat people, they may not eat me.

Look at the woman's words of "biting you a few times", laughing with a group of people with green faces and fangs, and the words of the tenant the day before yesterday, which are obviously code words. I can see that his words are full of poison and his smile is full of knives. Their teeth are all white and complete, and this is the guy who eats people.

According to my own thinking, although I'm not a villain, it's hard to say since I kicked the ancient books. They seem to have ulterior motives, and I can't even guess. And when you turn your face, you say that people are wicked. I still remember my big brother teaching me how to do theory. No matter how good I am, I turn him over and he will play a few rounds. Forgive the bad guy a few words, and he will say, "Be wonderful and different." I can guess what their thoughts are there; Besides, it's time to eat.

Everything must be studied to understand. I remember eating people in ancient times, but I don't know. I looked at the history and found that it has no age, and the words "benevolence, righteousness and morality" are written on every crooked leaf. I can't sleep anyway. I read it carefully in the middle of the night before I saw the words through the gap. The book is full of "cannibalism"!

There were so many words written in the book and so did the tenants, but they all looked at me with strange smiles.

I'm human too. They want to eat me!

four

In the morning, I sat quietly for a while. Chen Laowu sent a meal, a bowl of vegetables and a bowl of steamed fish. Fish's eyes are white and hard, and their mouths are open, just like those who want to eat people. After eating a few chopsticks, I didn't know if it was a fish or a person, so I spit him out.

I said, "Old Five, tell Big Brother that I am bored and want to go for a walk in the garden." Old five refused and left; After a pause, I opened the door.

I don't move, study how they manipulate me; Knowing they won't relax. Sure enough! My eldest brother led an old man and walked slowly; He was full of fierce eyes, afraid that I would see him, but he lowered his head to the ground and secretly looked at me from the side of his glasses. Big brother said, "You seem to be fine today." I said, "Yes." The eldest brother said, "Please ask Mr. He to come today and give you a diagnosis." I said, "Yes!" In fact, I didn't know the old man was dressed as an executioner! It is nothing more than speculating about fatness in the name of pulse-cutting: because of this credit, I also shared a piece of meat. I'm not afraid; Although not cannibal, he is braver than them. Hold out two fists and see what he does. The old man sat with his eyes closed, touched for a long time and stayed for a long time; He opened his eyes and said, "Forget it. Just keep it quiet for a few days. "

Don't think about it, raise it quietly! After gaining weight, they can naturally eat more; What's good for me? How can I be "good"? They are a group of people who want to eat people, sneak around, want to hide, and dare not do it directly. It really makes me laugh to death. I couldn't help it. I laughed and was very happy. I know there is kindness in this laughter. The old man's face was bloodless and was suppressed by my courage and loyalty.

But I have courage. The more they want to eat me, the braver they are. The old man stepped out of the door and didn't go far. He whispered to his eldest brother, "Eat quickly!" " Eldest brother nodded. It's you! This is a great idea. Although it seems to be an accident, I also care: the person who eats me in partnership is my brother!

It is my brother who eats people!

I am the brother of a cannibal!

I was eaten by myself, but I am still the brother of a cannibal!

five

These days, I took a step back and thought: if the old man doesn't dress up as an executioner, he is really a doctor, and he is still a man-eater. In Materia Medica (4) written by their ancestor Li Shizhen, it is clearly written that human flesh can be fried and eaten; Can he still say not to eat people?

As for my eldest brother, I have never wronged him. When he told me a book, he personally said that he could "eat easily" (5); Once again, I happened to talk about a bad guy, who said that he would not only be killed, but also make "meat bedding" [6]. I was young and my heart was beating for a long time. Not surprisingly, a few days ago, the tenants of the prodigal village came to eat their hearts and kept nodding. It can be seen that the mind is as cruel as before. Since you can "eat for a change", everything is easy to get and everyone can eat. I once listened to his reasoning, but I was also confused; Now we know that when he makes sense, not only is his mouth smeared with human oil, but his heart is also full of cannibalism.

six

It's getting dark, I don't know whether it's day or night. Zhao's dog barked again.

A heart as fierce as a lion, as cowardly as a rabbit, as cunning as a fox, ...

seven

I know their methods. I won't kill them at once, nor dare I, for fear of getting into trouble. So I contacted them all, and they were full of traps, forcing me to commit suicide. Look at what the men and women in the street and my eldest brother have done in the past few days, and you can realize eight or nine points. It is best to take off your belt, hang it on the beam and strangle yourself; They didn't kill anyone, but they realized their wishes. Naturally, they all gave a happy laugh. Otherwise, I will be scared to death. Although I'm a little thinner, I can still nod my head a few times.

They only eat dead meat! -I remember that the book said that there was something called "Hai Yi Na". Once, the eyes and appearance were ugly. Often eat dead meat, even huge bones, chew it carefully and swallow it, which is also terrible to think of. "Hayina" is a relative of the wolf, and the wolf is the dog's family. Zhao's dog looked at me the day before yesterday, showing that he was also an accomplice and was close to him. The old man's eyes are on the ground, so he can't hide it from me.

The most pitiful is my eldest brother, who is also a human being. Why isn't he afraid? Partner to eat me? Or have you always been used to it, right? Or did you lose your conscience and knowingly commit a crime?

I curse the man who eats people, starting with him; If you want to convince a cannibal to turn around, start with him.

eight

In fact, they should understand this truth by now. ...

Suddenly a man came; He is only about twenty years old and his appearance is not very clear. He was smiling all over his face. When he nodded to me, his smile didn't look like a real smile. I asked him, "Eating people, right?" He still smiled and said, "If it wasn't a famine year, how could it eat people?" I knew at once that he was also a group and liked to eat people; He was very courageous and insisted on asking him.

"Right?"

"Ask him what such a thing. You are really good at telling jokes. ..... The weather is very good today. "

The weather is clear and the moonlight is bright. But I want to ask you, "Right?"

He doesn't think so. A vague answer: "No ..."

"No? Why do they eat? ! "

"No matter ..."

"No matter? The prodigal son village is eating now; There is a book that says it is red and new! "

His face changed, a white and bloodless complexion. Open your eyes and say, "There are many, never like this ..."

"Never, right?"

"I won't tell you these truths; In short, you shouldn't say it. It is your fault to say it! "

I jumped up and opened my eyes, and the man was gone. I'm sweating all over. His age, much younger than my eldest brother, is actually a group; This must have been taught by his mother. I'm afraid I have taught it to his son; So even children look at me with malicious intent.

nine

I want to eat people, but I'm afraid of being eaten by others. They all looked at each other with great suspicion. ……

Considering this, walking, eating and sleeping are very comfortable. This is just a threshold, a pass. They are father, son, brother, husband, wife, friend, teacher, student, enemy and stranger. They all form a group, encouraging each other and pulling each other, and will never cross this step.

ten

Early in the morning, go to my eldest brother; He stood outside the hall looking at the sky, so I walked behind him, stopped the door, and said to him very silently and kindly:

"Eldest brother, I have something to tell you."

"Go ahead," he quickly turned to his face and nodded.

"I only have a few words, but I won't say it. Brother, they all ate a little about the savage at the beginning. Later, because of different minds, some people stopped eating people and just wanted to be better, so they became human beings and real people. Some are still eating-just like bugs, some have turned into fish, birds and monkeys until they become people. Some are not good, or bugs. This man who eats people is more shameful than a man who doesn't eat people. I'm afraid it's far worse than the shy monkey of the bug.

"Ya ya was steamed son, eat, or a thing of the past. Who knows that since Pangu opened the heavens and the earth, he has been eating the son of Yiya; From The Son of Elegance to The Sign of Xu Xilin: Since Xu Xilin, I have been eating people arrested by Langzi Village. Last year, criminals were killed in the city, and a man with consumption soaked steamed bread in blood.

"They want to eat me, you a person, the original also couldn't think of; But why do you want to join? People who eat people are powerless; They will eat me, they will eat you, and they will eat themselves in groups. But as long as you take a step and change immediately, everyone will live in peace. Although it has never been like this, we can be particularly good today and say no! Brother, I believe you can say that the tenant wanted to reduce the rent the day before yesterday, but you saidno. "

At first he just sneered, then his eyes became fierce. His face turned blue when he revealed their secret. Outside the gate stood a group of people, Zhao Guiweng and his dog, also inside, all poked around and got in. Some are invisible faces, which seem to be covered with cloth; Some are still green-faced and fangs, sipping their mouths and laughing. I know they are a group. They are all cannibals. However, I also know that their minds are very different. One is that they think they should eat like this. One is that he knows he shouldn't eat it, but he still wants to eat it for fear that others will tell him. So, after listening to my words, he became more and more angry, but he sneered.

At that time, the boss also suddenly appeared lost expression, loudly drink a way, "all out! What is there to see in a madman! "

At this time, I learned the other side of their cleverness. They not only refused to change, but also arranged it; Prepare the name of the next madman to cover me. After eating it, it will not only be peaceful, but also be afraid that someone will see it. The tenant said everyone ate the wicked, that's all. This is their old spectrum!

Chen Lao Wu also came in angrily. How can I keep my mouth shut? I have to say to these people, "you can change, from the heart!" You know, cannibals are not allowed in the world in the future.

"Don't change to eat. Even if there are many births, they will be destroyed by real people, just like hunters killing wolves! -like a bug! "

All those people were driven away by Chen Laowu. Big brother doesn't know where he has gone. Chen Laowu advised me to go back to the house. It was dark in the room. Beam rafters shaking on the head; I shook it for a while and then I grew up and piled it on me.

Extremely heavy, unable to move; He tried to kill me. I knew his heaviness was fake, so I struggled out and broke out in a sweat. Instead, he said firmly, "You changed immediately, from sincerity! You know, there is no room for eating people in the future, ... "

eleven

The sun does not rise, the door does not open, and there are two meals a day.

When I picked up chopsticks, I thought of my big brother. It's all his fault to know that my sister is dead. At that time, my sister was only five years old, and her lovely and pitiful appearance was still in sight. Mother kept crying, but he advised her not to cry. Probably because I ate it, I couldn't help crying. If I still feel bad, ... my sister was eaten by my big brother. Does my mother know? I don't know.

Mom wants to know; But I didn't explain when I cried, and I thought it was appropriate. I remember when I was four or five years old, I sat in front of the hall to enjoy the cool. My eldest brother said that my parents were ill, and a son was going to cut off a piece of meat and invite him to eat it when it was cooked. Only then can he be considered a good man. Mom didn't sayno. If you eat one piece, you can eat the whole piece naturally. But the way I cried that day, now that I think about it, it's really sad. This is really a strange thing!

twelve

I can't figure it out.

The place where people ate people for 4 thousand years, I didn't know until today that I had been in it for many years; Eldest brother is in charge of housework, and my sister just died. He may not be in the food, but he gave it to us secretly.

I accidentally ate a few pieces of my sister's meat, and now it's my turn ... I didn't know it at first, but now I understand that real people are hard to see!

thirteen

There are still children who haven't eaten anyone.

Save the children ...

191April 8.

white light

Chen Shicheng looked at the exam list in the county, and it was already afternoon when he got home. He went early, and when he saw the list,

I'll look for Chen Zi on it first. Chen said a lot, and seemed to jump into his eyes, but then.

But it is not the word Shicheng at all. So he searched carefully in the circle of twelve tables again, and everyone he saw was already there.

Cleared up, Chen Shicheng finally didn't see it on the list, standing in front of the hospital screen.

Although the cool breeze blows his short gray hair, the sunshine in early winter still shines gently on him. But he looks like

I was dazzled by the sun, and my face became more and more gray. From my tired red eyes, I gave off a strange flash. this

In fact, he can't see the placard on the wall for a long time, but there are many black circles hanging around in front of him.

Our scholars, except after having obtained the provincial examination, have made progress all the way ... Since gentlemen do everything possible to have relatives and people.

They are all in awe as if they had seen a god, deeply regretting their previous flirtation and cowardice, and ... driving away the rented house in their own broken house.

Miscellaneous surname-I didn't bother to move it myself-the house is brand-new, the door is a flagpole, and the head is flat ... I want to get rid of it.

Gao Shen is a Beijing official, otherwise it is better to seek his release. ..... He usually arranges a ready-made future, which is like a wet sugar tower at this time.

Usually the brakes burst, leaving only a pile of debris. He unconsciously rotates, feeling that his body is wandering and his direction is disconsolate.

The way home.

Hardly had he reached the door when seven pupils opened their throats and began to read. He was surprised and pricked up his ears.

There seems to be a knock on the edge of the flower. I saw seven heads dragging their braids in front of my eyes, all over the house, and black circles jumped with them.

. He sat down and when they sent him to night school, they all looked down on him.

"Go home." He hesitated for a moment, then said sadly.

They wrapped their schoolbags at random, grabbed them and ran away.

Chen Shicheng also saw many small heads with black circles flying before his eyes, sometimes in disorder and sometimes in strange arrays.

However, gradually, it decreased, moldy beard.

"It's over again this time!"

He was surprised and jumped up, obviously in his ear, but no one turned around, as if listening again.

Om knocked A Qing, mouth also said:

"It's over again this time!"

He suddenly raised a hand and counted it with one finger, eleven or thirteen times, even sixteen times this year, but there was no one there.

It's a pity that an examiner is as blind as a bat to the article and can't help laughing. However, he angrily, mo.

Slowly take out the real craft and test paper (3) from under the cloth and come out with it. Near the door, I saw my eyes light up.

Bright, even a group of chickens are laughing at him, can't help jumping wildly and have to retract inside.

He sat down again, his eyes flashing more; He witnessed many things, but he was very stupid-he collapsed.

A sugar tower-like future is in front of him, and this future is only vast, blocking all his ways.

The smell of smoke in other people's kitchens has disappeared and the dishes have been washed, but Chen Shicheng still refuses to cook. The miscellaneous surname contained here is Zhi.

As usual, whenever you see such a vision after the release of the list in the year of county examination, it is better to close the door as soon as possible and leave it alone.

Things. There was no voice at first, and then the lights went out one after another. The unique moon slowly appeared in the cold night sky.

The sky is as blue as the sea, with clouds floating slightly, as if someone had washed chalk in a pen. Moon pair

With the fluctuation of Chen Shicheng's cold light, it looks like a freshly ground iron mirror, but this mirror is mysterious.

Through Chen Shicheng's whole body, the shadow of the iron moon reflected on him.

He is still wandering in the yard outside the house, his eyes are quite quiet, and there is silence around him. But this silence is sudden and unprovoked.

Get up, his ear is sure to hear the rapid whisper:

"Turn left and turn right ..."

He shrugged, and when he listened, the voice repeated in a higher voice:

"Turn right!"

He remembers. This yard is when his home was not carved like this. Speaking of summer nights, every night is with his ancestors.

Mom is in this cool yard. At that time, he was just a ten-year-old child, lying on a bamboo couch, and his grandmother sat beside the couch and said

Tell him an interesting story. Yi said that she had heard from Yi's grandmother that Chen's ancestors were extremely rich and this house was their ancestors.

Cheap, the ancestors buried countless silver, and the lucky children will get it, but it hasn't happened yet. As for the place

So, it is hidden in the middle of a riddle:

"Turn left and right, go ahead and walk again, no matter how much gold or silver there is."

For this riddle, Chen Shicheng in peacetime, also often secretly guess, but it's a pity that generally just guess.

Off, but I felt it right away. On one occasion, he was sure that it was a house rented to the Tang family.

However, there is always no courage to explore; After a while, it felt so different. As for his own family.

An old trace dug out, but it was all palpitations after the previous times, and I saw it myself later.

And feel ashamed and ashamed.

But today, the iron lamp covered Chen Shicheng, and he came to gently persuade him. He or I hesitated and gave him a serious one.

The evidence, coupled with depressing threats, forced him to turn his eyes to his room again.

White light flashed in his room, like a white round fan.

"Finally!"

As he spoke, he rushed into the room like a lion, but when he stepped in, the white light disappeared.

Only an old house and some broken tables are not in the dark. He stood calmly and slowly regained his concentration.

However, the white light is obviously bright again, this time it is wider, whiter than sulfur fire, thinner than fog, and it is

It's under the table near the east wall.

Chen Shiying ran behind the door like a lion, reaching for a hoe, but ran into a shadow. He was somehow a little scared.

Between the lights, you can see that the hoe is not leaning outside. He removed the table, dug out four broad bricks with a hoe and squatted down.

Look, as usual, this is the fine sand in Huang Chengcheng. As soon as the sleeves were opened, the black soil below was exposed. He is very careful and quiet.

Yes, one hoe after another digs down, but it's too quiet in the middle of the night, and the sound of sharp iron touching the soil is always faint, so I don't want to lie.

Hair bands.

The pit is more than two feet deep and there is no urn mouth. Chen Shicheng was quick and brittle, which made her wrist ache and ache.

The tip touched something hard; He threw down his hoe in a hurry. When he groped for it, there was a big brick under it. His heart.

Trembling badly, I dug out the brick attentively, and the black soil below was all the same as before, and there was a lot of loose soil.

There seems to be no end below. But suddenly it met a hard little thing, round, about a rusty copper coin; In addition, it also

There are several broken disks.

Chen Shicheng seems to feel empty and sweaty, only scratching impatiently; At the same time, my heart trembled in the air.

And touched a strange little thing, which looked like a horseshoe, but its tentacles were fragile. He was absorbed again.

God dug up that thing and held it carefully. When he looked at it carefully in the light, it was like a rotten bone.

There is a row of broken teeth on it. He mistook this for a jawbone, which was in his hand.

Rizzo was moved, smiled cheerfully and finally heard him say:

"It's over again this time!"

He caught a cold and let go at the same time. It wasn't long before his chin went back to the pit lightly and he escaped.

It's in the yard. He secretly looked into the room, the lights were so brilliant, the chin bones were so ridiculous, and he was extremely afraid of people, so he again

Dare not look over there. He felt safer hiding in the shadows under the eaves in the distance; But in this silence, suddenly ears.

Flowers want to listen to the whisper whispered:

"No ... going to the mountains ..."

Chen Shicheng seems to remember that he heard someone say such a thing in the street during the day. He didn't wait to listen, and suddenly realized.

Yes He suddenly turned his back to the sky, and the moon had disappeared on Xifeng, 35 miles away from the city.

Previously, Chao Wat (4) was usually black with the sound of "need", and the glyph stood upright with "e" instead of "charm", and the surrounding was magnificent.

There was a big flash of white light.

And this white light is far ahead.

"Yes, go to the mountains!"

He decided to think about it and ran out sadly. After opening the door several times, there was no sound in the door. light

After the headlights shine on empty houses and potholes, they are peeled off and fried several times, then gradually reduced to nothing, and then

Yes, the residual oil has been burned out.

"Open the door ~ ~"

With great hope and fear, she trembled and screamed at dawn in front of Xiguan.

The next day, in Japan and China, someone saw a floating corpse in Wanliu Lake, fifteen miles away from Ximen, and immediately spread it around.

Yu listened to Di Bao and asked the villagers to raise him. It was the body of a man in his fifties. "There was a white face in it."

Must be ",and there are no clothes. Or this is Chen Shicheng. But the neighbors were too lazy to look at it and there was no body to claim.

Therefore, after the county party Committee inspected it, it was buried in the soil. As for the cause of death, of course, there is no problem, stripping the body.

Clothes are a common thing, which is not enough to suspect murder: besides, burial after death proved to be a drowning before his death, because he did.

The chisel once fought to the death underwater, so all ten fingernails were embedded with river mud.

1June, 922.