What are the classic jokes in the financial field?

1, everyone is an economist.

If you say you are a physicist, the listener will respond, "I don't know physics." So I stopped talking. But if you say you are an economist, the listener will respond: "Economics? I don't understand, but I want to ... "Follow gushing.

-This joke comes from the mouth of the famous economist stigler.

2. A group of martial arts students are about to graduate. The teacher told them: "After going out, don't compete with economists, because they all have an invisible hand.

3. Distinguish between public and private

Q: What's the difference between buying lottery tickets and buying junk stocks?

A: In the first case, you are helping to fund the community swimming pool. In the second case, you are helping stock speculators to finance their family swimming pool.

4. Bullets have no wigs

Q: Where should you publish your paper?

A: If you can understand and prove it, send it to a math magazine. If you can understand but can't prove it, send it to a physics magazine; If you can't understand it but can prove it, send it to the Journal of Economics; If you can't understand or prove it, send it to Psychology magazine.

Only in the discipline of economics can two opposing scholars share the same Nobel Prize. (Mildred and Hayek are an example)

6, incentive compatibility

It is said that a wise man once said that political party analysts use economic data in the same way as alcoholics use lampposts. They are not trying to tell the truth, but seeking support.

7. Economists develop cheats

A doctor of economics finally graduated and was about to leave. His tutor came to him and said, "I'll tell you the secret of becoming a good economist." It's not complicated at all You should firmly grasp the obvious and consciously elaborate it in a complicated and profound way. "

8. Achieving free trade is like going to heaven. Everyone wants to go, but they don't want to go too early.

9, wit master

Former Federal Reserve Chairman Ben alan greenspan famously said: If you think you understand what I said, you must have misunderstood me.

10, economists are such people. He doesn't know what he's talking about, but he makes you think it's your fault.

1 1, the first law of economists: for any economist, there must be an economist with equal strength and tit-for-tat views. The second law of economists: they are all wrong.

12, economic statistics are like bikinis. The exposed part is important, but the unexposed part is more deadly.

13, the cost view of economists

Economist George and his wife Maggie visit the State Aviation Fair every year. Every year George says, "Maggie, I really want to take the plane over there."

Every year Maggie replies, "I know, George, but it costs $65,438+00 to sit down. After all, 10 is 10. "

This year, George and Maggie both came to the National Aviation Expo. George said, "Maggie, I'm 7 1 years old. If I don't fly once this year, I may never have another chance. "

Maggie replied, "George, that plane will cost $65,438+00." After all, 10 is 10. "

The pilot couldn't bear to hear their arguments every year, so he said, "friends, I'll make a deal with you." I'll let you all fly once. If you can keep silent and say nothing during the whole flight, I won't charge you, but if you say a word, you have to pay 10 dollars. "

George and Maggie agreed and got on the plane. The pilot asked the plane to roll, spin and dive, but he didn't hear a word from two people. The pilot repeated the above action again, and there was still silence.

After the plane landed, the pilot turned to George and said, "God, I tried to make you shout, but you just didn't."

George replied, "Actually, I wanted to shout when Maggie got off the plane, but 10 is 10 after all."

14, the conclusion of economists

British Prime Minister Churchill said: "When two economists discuss a problem, they usually come to two conclusions;" If one of them is a famous economist, then there must be more than three conclusions. "

15, the "comparative advantage" of economists

An economist and a mathematician were walking in the forest when suddenly they met a big black bear. When the economist saw it, he turned away in fear and ran away. The mathematician said, "Don't run, we can't outrun the black bear!" " The economist said, "I can't outrun the black bear, but I can outrun you!" " "

16, impressive performance.

Economists have predicted nine of the past five recessions.

17, social contribution

A: "What did The Economist do?" Already: "In the short term, they have done a lot, but in the long term, they have done nothing."

18, heartfelt words

It is said that Mrs Robinson, a British economist, said, "I study economics so as not to be deceived by economists."

19, rational ignorance

There are two things in the world, and you will feel better if you don't understand the production process: sausages and econometric data.

20, the change is the same.

An economist went back to his alma mater and was very interested in the current exam questions. So he asked the teacher who had taught him to take out the examination questions. To his great surprise, the exam questions now are exactly the same as those he answered ten years ago. He asked the teacher why this happened. The teacher replied, "Although the question hasn't changed, the answer has changed."