A joke that makes people laugh to death

One day, three explorers finally found the "Valley of Hope". According to legend, as long as you stand by the valley, shout what you want and then jump into the valley, you will get what you want. So the three of them decided to have a try. The first one was a goat, so he shouted "Woman! Woman! " The next jump is really full of beautiful women waiting for him. The second is a bookworm, shouting "book, book, book!" " Then, he jumped into the valley and got books full of pits and valleys. The third is an indecisive person. He can't decide what he likes best after careful consideration. After an hour, he finally made up his mind that money is the most useful thing, so he went to the edge of the valley. He accidentally kicked a stone and scolded, "Shit!" Unexpectedly, an unstable center of gravity fell into the valley. Xiaoming, who will have an exam tomorrow, is watching TV at night. Xiaoming's mother asked anxiously, Have you read all the books? There will be an exam tomorrow. Xiao Ming replied brightly: Mom, I finished reading it. Xiao Ming's mother praised Xiao Ming happily: Good boy, then you must do well in the exam tomorrow. Xiao Ming cried and said, Mom, I mean,' Mom, I think it's over'. 13. One day, a university teacher asked a student that there were ten birds in the tree and one was shot dead. How much is left? The student asked: Is it silent pistol? No, how loud was the shot? 80- 100 decibel. Is it illegal to shoot birds in this city? No offense. Are you sure that bird was really killed? Of course. At this time, the teacher was impatient: "Will you just tell me how many birds are left?" Are there some deaf birds in the tree? No. Have you ever been caged and hung from a tree? No. Are there any other trees nearby? Are there any other birds in the tree? No, if a bird is pregnant, is it a bird in its belly? Not exactly. Is there a flower in the bird photographer's eye? There are no flowers, only ten. The teacher was sweating all over, and the bell rang, but the students continued to ask: Are there any stupid birds that are not afraid of death? Fear of death. Would you kill two with one shot? No, the student said confidently, if your answer is not a lie, "if the bird that was killed hangs on the tree and doesn't fall, there is only one left." If it falls, there will be none left. " . The teacher immediately foaming at the mouth fell to the ground! Tutu said, "My mother calls me Tutu, which is nice!" "The pig said," My mother calls me a pig, which is very nice! ""The dog said, "My mother called me a puppy, which is nice!" "The chicken said," you talk, I walked first! Little Nutbrown hare said, "I am a son of a bitch!" " The pig said, "I am a son of a bitch!" " The chicken said, "I am a son of a bitch!" " The dog said, "you talk, I'll go first!" `````````````` No.0 sparring partner said, "Outsiders call me zero sparring partner, which is nice! "1 sparring partner said," It's good to have an outsider! " No.2 sparring partner said, "It's good for outsiders to call me Second Escort! "No.3 sparring partner said:" You talk, let's go first! "The cat said to me," I am your grandmother's cat, so good! " The dog said to me, "I am your grandmother's dog, which sounds very nice!" "The fish said to me," I'm your grandmother's fish. It sounds nice! " "The bear said," you chat, I walked first! Lang Ke said: "People call me a ronin, which is good!" The samurai said, "It's nice to be called a samurai!" The expert said, "It's nice to be called an expert!" "The swordsman said," you talk, I walked first. Jane Zhang said, "My fans say my idol is Ying." He Jie said, "My fans say my idol is Jay." "My fans say my idol is Jay. "I walked first. The senior math teacher said: I teach senior math this semester. The college physics teacher said: I teach physics this semester. The analog electronics teacher said: I teach analog electronics this semester. The teacher of socialist economics said: Speak. I'll go first. ``````````````````` Peking University said: I am from Peking University. Tianjin University said: I am older. Shanghai University said: I went to college. Xiamen University said: You talk, I'll go first! General Li Zongren said: I am a kind-hearted person! General fu said to him: I am just! General Zuo Quan said: I have this right! General Huo Qubing said: You talk, I'll go first. Minolta users say: we are beautiful women! Canon users say: we are beautiful! The user of Huaguang said: We are from China! Nikon users said: you can chat, then I'll go first. The door of Lao Zhang's house is made of wicker. Lao Zhang said: My door is made of wood. Lao Li's door is made of plastic. Lao Li said: My door is made of plastic. Lao Wang's door is made of brick. ```````````````````` Bai Yu said: My name is Bai Yu. Jade jade said, my name is jasper. Redjade said, My name is Redjade. Xing Yu said: You talk, I'll go first! The students of Teachers College said: I am a student of Railway College of Teachers College, said: I am a student of Vocational College of Iron Institute, said: I am a student of Technical College of Vocational College, said: You chat, I will go first.