Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Afterword! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! 1
Afterword! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! 1
The blind man wears glasses - fake intelligence
The blind man pulls the bellows - tinkering
The blind man peels garlic - bullshit
A blind man learns embroidery - a blind show of talent
A blind man takes to the street - arrogant
A blind man leads the way to the blind - nonsense
A blind man rides a blind horse - Breaking in and out
Needles hidden in ink - hard to find
Cuttlefish belly and pufferfish liver - black and poisonous
Monk in the temple - Wu Lian Wu Gua
The clay elephant in Duanli - human-like but inhumane
Fart in the temple - Grandpa Xun is here
The Buddha in the temple - — Eyes but no eyes
The horse in the temple — can’t (surprise)
The bell in the temple — the sound is empty
Jasmine feeds the camel — How much does that cost
A rotten winter melon - a belly full of bad water
A rotten lotus couple - a bad intention
Bee's butt - a stinging head
Bee's eyes - protruding
Bee nest - hole
Bee sting - urgent
Bee flies to the painting Up - Konghuanxi
Coal goes into water - it will never be cleaned up in a lifetime
The person who takes advantage of coal - a black heart
The shopkeeper of the coal shop - makes money Black money
The matchmaker has a bad mouth - it is difficult to speak
The eyebrows are on fire - the eyes are red
Firecrackers are set off on the eyebrows - disaster is before your eyes
p>
Put a ladder on your eyebrows, one cannot fit your face
Grab your eyebrows and beard - regardless of priority
Hold your courage on your eyebrows - suffer in front of your eyes
Swinging on the eyebrows - Xuanhu
Pinching lice on the eyebrows - Eye color (lice)
I turned to sleep one by one
Pushing rice porridge with your eyes - why are you pretending to be stupid
My sister posted couplets - no distinction between top and bottom
Meixiang bows down - they are all slaves
Dream dinner - - Greedy
Seeing Coptis in a dream - thinking hard
Thinking of a daughter-in-law in a dream - a beautiful thought
A sparrow marrying a girl - Xi Chui Beat carefully
Sparrows drink river water - can't do it
Sparrows move - Qingqing chats
Sparrows fly into the photo studio - it's easy to meet but difficult to talk
p>
The sparrow flew to the flagpole - the bird is not big, but the stand is not small
The sparrow flew to the sugar pile - empty joy
The sparrow's belly - Narrow-minded
The sparrow fell into the noodle vat - the mouth was mushy
The sparrow had a meeting - discussed in detail
The sparrow fell on the archway - the thing was not big. No airs,
The sparrow flies into the sea - without landing
The sparrow has a bulging belly - so full of air
The sparrow flies into the sea - without landing
p>
Pockmarked skydiving - a riot of excitement
Embroidering pieces of linen - a waste of effort
Making dragon robes out of linen bags - not this material
Linen Entering the water - the lemon is not dry
Press the light bulb on the hemp rope - the wrong line
Tie the tofu with the hemp rope - cannot lift it
Thread the hemp rope Embroidery needle - can't pass
Hanging eggs with hemp rope - both ends are empty
Stringing tofu with hemp rope - can't lift it up
Pull up the electric lamp on the hemp rope ——The route is wrong
The sack contains *——I don’t know the black and white
The embroidery on the sack piece-one generation (bag) is not as good as the other generation (bag
Embroidery on the sack- —Poor foundation
Sesame oil fried tofu--a big investment
Threading twine through needle--can't get through it
Threading twine through the eye of needle--just passable
The hemp stalks are used as scales - not sure of cultivation
The hemp stalks hang themselves - the crispy ghost
The sealed boat is launched into the water—opening the mouth is a disaster
The sealed boat is launched into the water—go with the tide
The cat chants sutras—
— Pretending to be a good person
The mouse in the cat’s mouth - there is nothing left
The cat bites the tiger unexpectedly
The cat’s paw reaches into the fish tank - he wants to catch one
Put a cat in a tiger's garb - show off its power
Put the tiger's gall in the cat's belly - it won't be fierce
Owl catches a mouse - do good deeds and get a bad reputation
The owl sings - howls indiscriminately
The cat guards the mouse hole - calmly
The cat was chased up the tree by the tiger - thanks to saving a hand
The cat plays with the mouse - coaxing it to play
The cat will not eat the dead mouse - pretending to be polite
The mouse in the cat's mouth - cannot escape
The cat Catching mice and dogs, guarding the house - the job
Roasting pancakes over a fierce fire - no good products
Cotton ears - can't stand the blow
Cotton exchange Walnuts - eat hard and not soft
Needles hidden in cotton - soft but hard
Fire in cotton pile - hopeless
Look in cotton pile Fleas - not found
Growing sesame seeds in the cotton field - killing two birds with one stone
Cotton ears - the roots are soft
Cotton plugged the nose - it feels uncomfortable to hold it in
The cotton roll is looking for the gong - no reply
The cotton mallet is playing the drum - no sound
The cotton yarn is pulling the donkey - not reliable
Cotton pants have no legs - they are half cold
Cotton jackets are changed to leather jackets - getting better and better
Matchmaker praises the leap girl - the sky is full of flowers
Matchmaker Proposing a marriage - Jing Xie said something nice
The matchmaker lost her way - nothing to say
The matchmaker praised the girl - she spoke like a fairy
Feeling the rock River - steady and steady
Feeling the light and having fun - playing tricks
Feeling in the dark and catching mice - bumping into walls everywhere
Bindfolding one's eyes - Not following the right path
Farting while covered with a quilt - Swallowing alone
Pulling while blindfolded - Wandering around blindly
Bean dregs in steamed buns - People Do not praise yourself and praise yourself
Pockmarked is not called Pockmarked - a trap
Pockmarked is in charge - has many ideas...
(It is a metaphor for having a Taoist, with many ideas and methods. )
Mazi knocks on the door - he has tricked people
(A metaphor for doing evil, which is extremely harmful to others.)
Mazi's face - full of shortcomings
Putting nails in a sack – showing the head out
Putting a water chestnut in a sack – forcing oneself to drill out
Making dragon robes out of a sack – not this material
Embroidery on sacks - poor foundation
(A metaphor for poor foundation.)
Building bridges with hemp straw - quite impressive
(Metaphor for being unable to do the job; dare not take it.)
Building a bridge with hemp stalks - sad
(Metaphor for not being able to live an easy life.)
Although the sparrow is small - it has a good liver and gallbladder
/p>
Ma Noshu explains the board - not a serious material
Hitting a tiger with a hemp pole - no pain or itching
Mazi's photo...his face doesn't look good
p>
Reading on horseback - let's see
When Ma Daha was an accountant...it was all a mess
Malaysian coffee - intriguing
The horse's spoon touches the rim of the pot - a common occurrence
(This metaphor is not uncommon. )
A horse's bit is put on an ox's mouth - Hu Le
The road is not called a road - justice
(①A metaphor for justice. ②Fair and reasonable. )
Horse tail carrying tofu - cannot be skewered
Hornets crossing the river - carrying (evil) poison
Hornets sting the bald man - without covering or covering
(The metaphor has nothing to hide.
)
Flies in the manger - eat as a meal
Bake pancakes with warm water - hot on the skin but cool on the heart
Blank chicken feathers in warm water - hard to pull
Boil chestnuts in warm water - half-cooked
Warm beef - slow cooking
Boil turtles in warm soup - neither dead nor alive
Cover your ears Shooting off firecrackers - for fear of being overheard
Catching thieves while holding your wallet - extra carelessness
Crossing the river while holding your buttocks - Be careful of overstepping (crossing)
Water on the eaves - every drop never leaves home
Taking shelter from the rain under the eaves - not for long
Hanging *but under the eaves - drops of bitter water
The roof of the house was hit by continuous rain, the boat was broken and a phoenix was encountered - disaster
The tortoise on the roof could not reach the sky or the ground
The baby was teasing my sister - hehehaha
The baby fish climbed up the tree - looking left and right, it looked like a human being
The mouth of the baby fish - delicious
Mosquito bites eggs - seamless and can be drilled
Mosquito bites - it all depends on your good mouth
Mosquitoes fart - stingy
Mosquitoes can recognize males and females when they fly by - good eyesight
p>Mosquito bites the egg - there is no place to hide
Mosquito bites the weight - it's such a sunny day
Mosquito bites the Bodhisattva - he admits the wrong person
Mosquitoes are looking for liver and gallbladder - deliberately making things difficult
Mosquitoes yawn - the weather is not bad
Mosquitoes are looking for spiders - throwing themselves into a trap
Mosquitoes Singing a little tune - trying to bite someone
Mosquitoes were slapped - they suffered the consequences
Going to the market in the evening - they dispersed
Sleeping in a snail shell ——It’s hard to stand up
Snail goes to the banquet——Uninvited guest
Snail’s house——Carry it on your back
Snail race——Climb slowly
A centipede eats a scorpion - fighting poison with poison
The fresh peaches on the cliff - no one pays attention (picks them); no one tastes them
The side of the long live man's thatch - none Your share (dung)
Long live him who fell into the well - dare not work (fish) for your great job
amuse around the beggar - make fun of the poor
Eating watermelon around the stove - feeling sweet in the heart and feeling warm in the body
Playing chess on the Go board - wrong numbers
The God of Wealth knocks on the door - Fu Congtian Falling; a great thing
Happily watching a play with a baby
Happily watching a magic trick with a baby
It’s so exciting when a baby takes to the streets Where to go
Dolls playing with fire - never do it
Dolls as commanders - villains succeed
Dolls playing chess - no overall situation in mind
A doll rides a wooden horse - no progress, no retreat
Smell the snuff and dip it in the spit - a fake expert
Smell the coffin and call out some incense - death is imminent
Dig a well and encounter an artesian spring - just what you want
(The metaphor is in line with your own ideas. )
Gouged out his eyes and became a judge - blind to the end
Wa Pomegranate - so hard to eat
Changing socks into trousers - Gao Sheng
(It means that the official position has been promoted again.
)
Eating pomegranates with a crooked mouth - coming up with crooked ideas
Blowing a trumpet with a crooked mouth - an evil (slanted) air
Playing a flute with a crooked mouth - Don't meet your eyes
Blow a lamp with a crooked mouth - full of evil (slanted) energy
Monk with a crooked mouth - not serious
Blow a conch with a crooked mouth - The two generals are going
The crooked-mouthed monk eats snails and gets crooked
The crooked-mouthed granny drinks the soup - drink left and right
The crooked-mouthed granny falls down - It's wrong to go up or down
A monk with a crooked mouth can't say a serious word when chanting sutras
Being a cavalryman with a crooked mouth - he will be embarrassed immediately
Talking with a crooked neck - Wrong words
Wearing a hat crookedly and a coat crookedly--indecent
Crooked pot with flat stove--a set with a set
Watching the show with head tilted Weird platform tilt - unreasonable trouble
The monk with a crooked mouth blows the lamp - a slanted breath
Wearing a sun mask with a crooked mouth - no problem can be seen
Look at the crooked neck Watch - incorrect views
A necklace on a crooked neck - not necessarily beautiful
A man with a crooked mouth blows a trumpet - the tone is wrong
A nephew beats an uncle - official business Public office
The nephew is wearing filial piety - there is no salvation (uncle)
Grandma has a little son - there is salvation (male)
The Kitchen God in the outer room ——Sit alone
Grandpa died——no way to save (uncle)
Pick up a piece of lining outside and throw a fur coat in the house——the gain outweighs the loss
Unqualified foreign trade goods - difficult to get out
When a scimitar meets a gourd to cut vegetables - just right
A bent tree - unable to straighten
Wang The old man prays for rain - sooner or later this year
The bastard eats a weight - determined
The bastard eats watermelon - rolls and crawls
The bastard eats watermelon Chicken feathers on the belly - turtle (return) with heart like an arrow
Wang Xiaoer celebrates the New Year - every year is not as good as the previous one
Wang Qi's brother - Wang Ba
The natives are too blind to read the notices - just pretending
The Queen Mother’s hammer stone - passing through the big battle formation
Wang Anshi drew a circle - leaving a tail
p>Wang Qiao fights against Shi Chong - willing to be defeated
The Queen Mother's flat peach - no matter how good it is, you can't eat it
The Queen Mother stretches out her hand - if you want a phoenix, you will get a phoenix. The rain is raining
Wang Zuo broke his arm - leaving one hand
The tortoise bit the weight - he was determined
The tortoise bit his finger - he refused to let go
Tortoise makes a report - hold back the sound and breath
The butt of the tortoise - regulations (tortoise)
The heart of the tortoise - the rectum and the belly ; What can’t be pretended
Wang Mazi eats walnuts - inside and outside ideas
Wang Taoist painting charms - he understands
Wang Po sells melons - sells himself and boasts
Wang Baoxuan fell in love with the beggar - having foresight
The bastard carrying the fork - consciously having the light
The bastard eating watermelon - rolling and crawling
Wang Xiaoer beats the gongs and drums - so poor
Looking at the scenery through a telescope - close before your eyes
The fish in the net, the bird in the cage - run away Can't
Metaphor of being unable to escape/
Looking at peonies on the terrace - being a ghost is also romantic
Looking at the wind and shadow - all in vain (metaphor of gaining nothing.
)
The snail on the mast - relying on the sky to eat
The spittoon on the side of the road - Renren Beer
Wast sting, scorpion Tail - can't be offended
Making a horse tail as a string - not worth talking about (playing)
Horse fighting - see the question (hooves)
Mara Wheelbarrow - just flip over
Hindsight - too late
Ponytail twisting rope - no effort required
Tie ponytail to ponytail - you kick I kick too, and you hit me too
The fly in the horse's spoon - a mixed meal
The horse lifts its hind legs - shows off its strength
Hornet's nest - Can't poke it
The ant carries the snail on its back - pretending to be a big-headed ghost
The ant's mouth grinds the plate - the strength of the mouth
The ant climbs the broom - all roads are there
Ants in a birdcage - there are many ways
Ants talk - meet each other
Ants urinate in books - not many words can be read/p> >
The ant drags the millstone - a waste of effort
The ant stabs the neck - not a bleeding tube
The ant drags the mouse - the heart is full but the strength is insufficient
Ants move - everyone talks
Ants pick up insects - everyone works hard
Ant carries a mantis on its back - shouldering a heavy responsibility
Ant cuts its head with a knife ——Without flesh and blood
Ant eats fireflies—it shines in the belly
Ant wears chaff—so shameless
Ant moves Mount Tai—Part 2 Too cruel
The ant carries the big tree - not overconfident
The ant wears a hat on his head - he wears a hat randomly
The ant meets the chicken - he deserves it
Grasshoppers carrying bricks on the bean rack - using the big frame to scare people
Grasshoppers carrying bricks - unable to bear the energy
Grasshoppers fighting roosters - overestimating their abilities
p>
The grasshopper sneezes - his mouth is full of grassy smell
The grasshopper gets on the bean rack - the little thing uses the big rack to scare people
The body of the grasshopper - the cartilage
When a locust sees blood, it bites (and stares) and doesn’t let go
Ant blocks the road—it doesn’t overturn
Ant has a sharp point when it catches a cow— Thinking you have climbed to a high mountain
Ant talks - meeting
Ant moves - either a phoenix or rain
A grasshopper climbs a bean rack - borrows a small thing The big frame is scary
Ants look at the sky - not knowing the height
Ants climb trees - Luzi Township
Ants drink water - just a drop is enough
Ants go into the pond - they don't know the depth
Ants go into the cell - they have their own way out
The buried mines - they are about to explode
Buying back a color TV and bringing back an invoice - well-founded
Buying salted fish and releasing them alive - committing an injustice
Buying a box and returning pearls - not knowing the goods
Selling clothes to buy wine - caring about one's mouth but not one's body
Selling one's son to recruit son-in-law - doing it upside down
Selling one's dog's coat to buy pants--not too short-sighted No man
Selling his son to recruit a son-in-law——Hu Tossing
Selling a child to sing a big show——What kind of achievement is he celebrating
A water seller looking at the big river—— It’s all money
Those who sell frying spoons - choose the ones that are reliable
Selling rice without rice - with bad intentions (quality)
Those who sell fried spoons Losing money - being greedy for stalls) is big
The crab seller goes on stage - there are many roles, but not many can sing
Selling wooden heads and being robbed by thieves - big shame
The one who sells earthenware basins - he wants one set and one set
The one who sells earthenware basins stumbles - he gets confused
The one who sells shrimps doesn't use a scale - Catch the blind (shrimp)
The salt seller drinks boiled water - tasteless
The coffin seller grits his teeth - hates people to death
The steamed bun seller mixes lime - His expression remains unchanged
The one who sells bean sprouts shakes his basket - clean and tidy
The one who sells oil does not add salt - does not care about (nothing)
The one who sells fried dough sticks Huqin——You (oil) hand is leisurely (string)
Selling cattle and hair to marry a mute——Nothing
You can talk about it
The tofu seller talks about the fragrant flowers - the business is not big and the business is big.
The flower seller talks about the fragrance of the flowers; the tea seller talks about the freshness of the vegetables - each has his own way.
The duck seller changed the basket - pouring (making) eggs
Bought wheat to make a basket - not steaming the steamed buns to steam (competing) the weather
The water seller looked at the big river - it was full of money
Wheat straw blew fire - stingy
The wheat awns poked into the eyes - stinging and painful
Wheat The chaff is rubbing the rope - no match for the hand
Kowtowing in the wheat stubble field - poking the eyes
Wheat straw holding the door - in vain
The wheat straw is used as a scale - - Use the straw as a scale - look at people too lowly
In the wheat straw Looking down on people - looking down upon them
Packed explosives in the wheat straw - fired off cannons indiscriminately
Swallowed the charcoal - became mute
The person pretending to be Qin Hui did not take off his costume - Who hasn’t seen that two-flowered face
The sky is covered with paste - Hu (Hu) Cloud
The sky is full of coptis - endless suffering
The sun is full of gold teeth - every mouth is a lie (yellow)
The garden is full of fruits - just you are red
The mouse covered in oil dives into the fire - How can it be better
The blind man plays Pai Gow - blindly touching
The blind man opens the day - talks nonsense
The blind man chats - talks nonsense
The blind man bought a trumpet and blew it one by one
The blind man used a lantern to illuminate others but not himself
The blind man wore glasses to show off
( The metaphor is just in name but has no actual effect)
A blind man rides a blind horse and rushes into chaos
A cat does not eat fish and is pretending to be polite
Cat. Catching mice...an ancestral craft
Cats catch mice and dogs guard the door——. Everyone keeps his/her duty
(Metaphorically speaking, everyone has their own responsibilities.)
The cat teaches the tiger - keep one hand
The cat drills the dog The hole is easy to pass through
The cat drills the mouse hole-cannot pass
The cat catches the mouse-relies on its own ability
The owl sings~...a strange sound
The donkey pulls the grindstone...he can't escape from this circle
Eating cantaloupe in the toilet...it doesn't smell good
The stones in the pit...it smells bad Hard
Comparing yourself to a dagger means having a bad reputation and having a stubborn attitude/
Throwing a bomb in a manhole... arousing public outrage (dung)
Comparing yourself to yourself arouses everyone Dissatisfaction/
An electric fan is installed in the toilet...~it will stink in the limelight
Putting roses in the toilet...cannot produce any fragrance
Big dung maggots in the toilet - —Survival in death (shit)
Peacock in the pit - smelly tune
Weighing weight in the pit - natural and hard
Nothing to do Shoe insole - belittled to the end
Impersonation - pretending to be real
Pipa without strings - where to start playing (talking)
Floating without roots Ping - helpless
Toothless wife gnaws bones - by licking
Put coal briquettes in lime - black and white distinct
Coal ash mixed with lime ——No distinction between black and white
Firecrackers on eyebrows——Fire (disaster) in front of eyes
Gourmets talk about food and clothing
Mei Lan Farewell My Concubine - A good show
(Metaphor for the best skill J
Looking at people through the crack in the door-Shu people look down on them
(Metaphor Look down on people.)
The bricks under the threshold are kicked in and out one by one
(This is a metaphor for pushing and pushing someone who doesn’t want it.
)
Looking at the sky through the crack in the door - narrow vision
Pooping on the threshold - smelly inside and out
The seal on the door - cannot be pulled
p>
The broom behind the door - specializing in dirty things to do
The weight in the corner of the door - a dead (real) mind
Behind the door to wipe dead people - on tenterhooks
The door frame is stripped off and looks like a big one
Hang a mat on the door - outrageous (painting)
Look at people through the crack in the door - look down on people
Being kept in the dark and listening to the thunder - not being able to figure out the north, south, east, west, etc.
(A metaphor for being confused and confused about the direction.)
Covered with a quilt Fart - swallow alone
(Metaphor for possessing alone)
Meng Jiangnu pulled her bangs - crying and laughing
(Metaphor for someone who is happy) , there are also sad ones)
Meng Huo’s surrender—orally convinced
Meng Jiangnu is looking for her husband—travelling thousands of miles
Eating honey in a dream—thinking sweetly
(It is a metaphor for a beautiful idea, but it may not be realized.)
Flying on a plane in a dream - thinking too hard
(A metaphor for an idea that is far from reality. , can't come true)
Getting money in a dream - blindly happy
Having a wife in a dream - a beautiful thought
Getting married in a dream - a good thing Nope
The words spoken in the dream - I don’t know whether they are true or not
The groom spoken in the dream - an empty wedding
Maitreya Buddha - smile every day
p>
Rice sieve crotch sunlight - cannot be covered
Sleeping in rice sieve - covered with eyes
Rice sieve filled with water - many loopholes
Cook rice into porridge - confused
Rice shop sells salt - meddle in nosy (salty) things
Wash your face in the rice soup basin - confused head
The rice pot has just started to draw firewood and rice - no cooperation at the critical moment
Rice soup to wash your hair - extremely confused
The mouse in the rice barn - no need to worry about having nothing to eat
Sealed cans - seamless and drillable
Sealed drinks - watertight
Sealed wax balls - no flaws
Cotton fell in Water - bombing (talking) is not possible
There is a needle in the cotton - soft but hard
(A metaphor for both soft and hard methods.)
Roll the dough with sesame seeds - stand still a little
Butter your hands - dip a little of everything you touch
Boil longevity peaches in the noodle soup - the bastard is sharp
Boil a ball in noodle soup - say you are a bastard and full of anger
Boil a light bulb in noodle soup - say you are a bastard and full of evil fire
The monk in the temple Zhong Yiming ( Famous and famous)
The wooden fish in the temple - grinning from ear to ear
The *heads in the temple - each has his own master
(the metaphors have all been Owned by everyone, nothing extra)
The flagpole on the temple gate - a bachelor
The stone lions in front of the temple - a pair
(metaphor) The two people have a close relationship)
The five hundred Arhats in the temple - each has a certain status
Crossing the river by feeling for the stones - it is more prudent
(A metaphor for doing things cautiously, steadily and reliably)
The magician does tricks - making something out of nothing
The donkey in the grinding tunnel... spins in circles
The donkey on the grinding mill - one by one Turn around
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