Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Afterword! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! 1

Afterword! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! 1

The blind man wears glasses - fake intelligence

The blind man pulls the bellows - tinkering

The blind man peels garlic - bullshit

A blind man learns embroidery - a blind show of talent

A blind man takes to the street - arrogant

A blind man leads the way to the blind - nonsense

A blind man rides a blind horse - Breaking in and out

Needles hidden in ink - hard to find

Cuttlefish belly and pufferfish liver - black and poisonous

Monk in the temple - Wu Lian Wu Gua

The clay elephant in Duanli - human-like but inhumane

Fart in the temple - Grandpa Xun is here

The Buddha in the temple - — Eyes but no eyes

The horse in the temple — can’t (surprise)

The bell in the temple — the sound is empty

Jasmine feeds the camel — How much does that cost

A rotten winter melon - a belly full of bad water

A rotten lotus couple - a bad intention

Bee's butt - a stinging head

Bee's eyes - protruding

Bee nest - hole

Bee sting - urgent

Bee flies to the painting Up - Konghuanxi

Coal goes into water - it will never be cleaned up in a lifetime

The person who takes advantage of coal - a black heart

The shopkeeper of the coal shop - makes money Black money

The matchmaker has a bad mouth - it is difficult to speak

The eyebrows are on fire - the eyes are red

Firecrackers are set off on the eyebrows - disaster is before your eyes

p>

Put a ladder on your eyebrows, one cannot fit your face

Grab your eyebrows and beard - regardless of priority

Hold your courage on your eyebrows - suffer in front of your eyes

Swinging on the eyebrows - Xuanhu

Pinching lice on the eyebrows - Eye color (lice)

I turned to sleep one by one

Pushing rice porridge with your eyes - why are you pretending to be stupid

My sister posted couplets - no distinction between top and bottom

Meixiang bows down - they are all slaves

Dream dinner - - Greedy

Seeing Coptis in a dream - thinking hard

Thinking of a daughter-in-law in a dream - a beautiful thought

A sparrow marrying a girl - Xi Chui Beat carefully

Sparrows drink river water - can't do it

Sparrows move - Qingqing chats

Sparrows fly into the photo studio - it's easy to meet but difficult to talk

p>

The sparrow flew to the flagpole - the bird is not big, but the stand is not small

The sparrow flew to the sugar pile - empty joy

The sparrow's belly - Narrow-minded

The sparrow fell into the noodle vat - the mouth was mushy

The sparrow had a meeting - discussed in detail

The sparrow fell on the archway - the thing was not big. No airs,

The sparrow flies into the sea - without landing

The sparrow has a bulging belly - so full of air

The sparrow flies into the sea - without landing

p>

Pockmarked skydiving - a riot of excitement

Embroidering pieces of linen - a waste of effort

Making dragon robes out of linen bags - not this material

Linen Entering the water - the lemon is not dry

Press the light bulb on the hemp rope - the wrong line

Tie the tofu with the hemp rope - cannot lift it

Thread the hemp rope Embroidery needle - can't pass

Hanging eggs with hemp rope - both ends are empty

Stringing tofu with hemp rope - can't lift it up

Pull up the electric lamp on the hemp rope ——The route is wrong

The sack contains *——I don’t know the black and white

The embroidery on the sack piece-one generation (bag) is not as good as the other generation (bag

Embroidery on the sack- —Poor foundation

Sesame oil fried tofu--a big investment

Threading twine through needle--can't get through it

Threading twine through the eye of needle--just passable

The hemp stalks are used as scales - not sure of cultivation

The hemp stalks hang themselves - the crispy ghost

The sealed boat is launched into the water—opening the mouth is a disaster

The sealed boat is launched into the water—go with the tide

The cat chants sutras—

— Pretending to be a good person

The mouse in the cat’s mouth - there is nothing left

The cat bites the tiger unexpectedly

The cat’s paw reaches into the fish tank - he wants to catch one

Put a cat in a tiger's garb - show off its power

Put the tiger's gall in the cat's belly - it won't be fierce

Owl catches a mouse - do good deeds and get a bad reputation

The owl sings - howls indiscriminately

The cat guards the mouse hole - calmly

The cat was chased up the tree by the tiger - thanks to saving a hand

The cat plays with the mouse - coaxing it to play

The cat will not eat the dead mouse - pretending to be polite

The mouse in the cat's mouth - cannot escape

The cat Catching mice and dogs, guarding the house - the job

Roasting pancakes over a fierce fire - no good products

Cotton ears - can't stand the blow

Cotton exchange Walnuts - eat hard and not soft

Needles hidden in cotton - soft but hard

Fire in cotton pile - hopeless

Look in cotton pile Fleas - not found

Growing sesame seeds in the cotton field - killing two birds with one stone

Cotton ears - the roots are soft

Cotton plugged the nose - it feels uncomfortable to hold it in

The cotton roll is looking for the gong - no reply

The cotton mallet is playing the drum - no sound

The cotton yarn is pulling the donkey - not reliable

Cotton pants have no legs - they are half cold

Cotton jackets are changed to leather jackets - getting better and better

Matchmaker praises the leap girl - the sky is full of flowers

Matchmaker Proposing a marriage - Jing Xie said something nice

The matchmaker lost her way - nothing to say

The matchmaker praised the girl - she spoke like a fairy

Feeling the rock River - steady and steady

Feeling the light and having fun - playing tricks

Feeling in the dark and catching mice - bumping into walls everywhere

Bindfolding one's eyes - Not following the right path

Farting while covered with a quilt - Swallowing alone

Pulling while blindfolded - Wandering around blindly

Bean dregs in steamed buns - People Do not praise yourself and praise yourself

Pockmarked is not called Pockmarked - a trap

Pockmarked is in charge - has many ideas...

(It is a metaphor for having a Taoist, with many ideas and methods. )

Mazi knocks on the door - he has tricked people

(A metaphor for doing evil, which is extremely harmful to others.)

Mazi's face - full of shortcomings

Putting nails in a sack – showing the head out

Putting a water chestnut in a sack – forcing oneself to drill out

Making dragon robes out of a sack – not this material

Embroidery on sacks - poor foundation

(A metaphor for poor foundation.)

Building bridges with hemp straw - quite impressive

(Metaphor for being unable to do the job; dare not take it.)

Building a bridge with hemp stalks - sad

(Metaphor for not being able to live an easy life.)

Although the sparrow is small - it has a good liver and gallbladder

/p>

Ma Noshu explains the board - not a serious material

Hitting a tiger with a hemp pole - no pain or itching

Mazi's photo...his face doesn't look good

p>

Reading on horseback - let's see

When Ma Daha was an accountant...it was all a mess

Malaysian coffee - intriguing

The horse's spoon touches the rim of the pot - a common occurrence

(This metaphor is not uncommon. )

A horse's bit is put on an ox's mouth - Hu Le

The road is not called a road - justice

(①A metaphor for justice. ②Fair and reasonable. )

Horse tail carrying tofu - cannot be skewered

Hornets crossing the river - carrying (evil) poison

Hornets sting the bald man - without covering or covering

(The metaphor has nothing to hide.

)

Flies in the manger - eat as a meal

Bake pancakes with warm water - hot on the skin but cool on the heart

Blank chicken feathers in warm water - hard to pull

Boil chestnuts in warm water - half-cooked

Warm beef - slow cooking

Boil turtles in warm soup - neither dead nor alive

Cover your ears Shooting off firecrackers - for fear of being overheard

Catching thieves while holding your wallet - extra carelessness

Crossing the river while holding your buttocks - Be careful of overstepping (crossing)

Water on the eaves - every drop never leaves home

Taking shelter from the rain under the eaves - not for long

Hanging *but under the eaves - drops of bitter water

The roof of the house was hit by continuous rain, the boat was broken and a phoenix was encountered - disaster

The tortoise on the roof could not reach the sky or the ground

The baby was teasing my sister - hehehaha

The baby fish climbed up the tree - looking left and right, it looked like a human being

The mouth of the baby fish - delicious

Mosquito bites eggs - seamless and can be drilled

Mosquito bites - it all depends on your good mouth

Mosquitoes fart - stingy

Mosquitoes can recognize males and females when they fly by - good eyesight

p>

Mosquito bites the egg - there is no place to hide

Mosquito bites the weight - it's such a sunny day

Mosquito bites the Bodhisattva - he admits the wrong person

Mosquitoes are looking for liver and gallbladder - deliberately making things difficult

Mosquitoes yawn - the weather is not bad

Mosquitoes are looking for spiders - throwing themselves into a trap

Mosquitoes Singing a little tune - trying to bite someone

Mosquitoes were slapped - they suffered the consequences

Going to the market in the evening - they dispersed

Sleeping in a snail shell ——It’s hard to stand up

Snail goes to the banquet——Uninvited guest

Snail’s house——Carry it on your back

Snail race——Climb slowly

A centipede eats a scorpion - fighting poison with poison

The fresh peaches on the cliff - no one pays attention (picks them); no one tastes them

The side of the long live man's thatch - none Your share (dung)

Long live him who fell into the well - dare not work (fish) for your great job

amuse around the beggar - make fun of the poor

Eating watermelon around the stove - feeling sweet in the heart and feeling warm in the body

Playing chess on the Go board - wrong numbers

The God of Wealth knocks on the door - Fu Congtian Falling; a great thing

Happily watching a play with a baby

Happily watching a magic trick with a baby

It’s so exciting when a baby takes to the streets Where to go

Dolls playing with fire - never do it

Dolls as commanders - villains succeed

Dolls playing chess - no overall situation in mind

A doll rides a wooden horse - no progress, no retreat

Smell the snuff and dip it in the spit - a fake expert

Smell the coffin and call out some incense - death is imminent

Dig a well and encounter an artesian spring - just what you want

(The metaphor is in line with your own ideas. )

Gouged out his eyes and became a judge - blind to the end

Wa Pomegranate - so hard to eat

Changing socks into trousers - Gao Sheng

(It means that the official position has been promoted again.

)

Eating pomegranates with a crooked mouth - coming up with crooked ideas

Blowing a trumpet with a crooked mouth - an evil (slanted) air

Playing a flute with a crooked mouth - Don't meet your eyes

Blow a lamp with a crooked mouth - full of evil (slanted) energy

Monk with a crooked mouth - not serious

Blow a conch with a crooked mouth - The two generals are going

The crooked-mouthed monk eats snails and gets crooked

The crooked-mouthed granny drinks the soup - drink left and right

The crooked-mouthed granny falls down - It's wrong to go up or down

A monk with a crooked mouth can't say a serious word when chanting sutras

Being a cavalryman with a crooked mouth - he will be embarrassed immediately

Talking with a crooked neck - Wrong words

Wearing a hat crookedly and a coat crookedly--indecent

Crooked pot with flat stove--a set with a set

Watching the show with head tilted Weird platform tilt - unreasonable trouble

The monk with a crooked mouth blows the lamp - a slanted breath

Wearing a sun mask with a crooked mouth - no problem can be seen

Look at the crooked neck Watch - incorrect views

A necklace on a crooked neck - not necessarily beautiful

A man with a crooked mouth blows a trumpet - the tone is wrong

A nephew beats an uncle - official business Public office

The nephew is wearing filial piety - there is no salvation (uncle)

Grandma has a little son - there is salvation (male)

The Kitchen God in the outer room ——Sit alone

Grandpa died——no way to save (uncle)

Pick up a piece of lining outside and throw a fur coat in the house——the gain outweighs the loss

Unqualified foreign trade goods - difficult to get out

When a scimitar meets a gourd to cut vegetables - just right

A bent tree - unable to straighten

Wang The old man prays for rain - sooner or later this year

The bastard eats a weight - determined

The bastard eats watermelon - rolls and crawls

The bastard eats watermelon Chicken feathers on the belly - turtle (return) with heart like an arrow

Wang Xiaoer celebrates the New Year - every year is not as good as the previous one

Wang Qi's brother - Wang Ba

The natives are too blind to read the notices - just pretending

The Queen Mother’s hammer stone - passing through the big battle formation

Wang Anshi drew a circle - leaving a tail

p>

Wang Qiao fights against Shi Chong - willing to be defeated

The Queen Mother's flat peach - no matter how good it is, you can't eat it

The Queen Mother stretches out her hand - if you want a phoenix, you will get a phoenix. The rain is raining

Wang Zuo broke his arm - leaving one hand

The tortoise bit the weight - he was determined

The tortoise bit his finger - he refused to let go

Tortoise makes a report - hold back the sound and breath

The butt of the tortoise - regulations (tortoise)

The heart of the tortoise - the rectum and the belly ; What can’t be pretended

Wang Mazi eats walnuts - inside and outside ideas

Wang Taoist painting charms - he understands

Wang Po sells melons - sells himself and boasts

Wang Baoxuan fell in love with the beggar - having foresight

The bastard carrying the fork - consciously having the light

The bastard eating watermelon - rolling and crawling

Wang Xiaoer beats the gongs and drums - so poor

Looking at the scenery through a telescope - close before your eyes

The fish in the net, the bird in the cage - run away Can't

Metaphor of being unable to escape/

Looking at peonies on the terrace - being a ghost is also romantic

Looking at the wind and shadow - all in vain (metaphor of gaining nothing.

)

The snail on the mast - relying on the sky to eat

The spittoon on the side of the road - Renren Beer

Wast sting, scorpion Tail - can't be offended

Making a horse tail as a string - not worth talking about (playing)

Horse fighting - see the question (hooves)

Mara Wheelbarrow - just flip over

Hindsight - too late

Ponytail twisting rope - no effort required

Tie ponytail to ponytail - you kick I kick too, and you hit me too

The fly in the horse's spoon - a mixed meal

The horse lifts its hind legs - shows off its strength

Hornet's nest - Can't poke it

The ant carries the snail on its back - pretending to be a big-headed ghost

The ant's mouth grinds the plate - the strength of the mouth

The ant climbs the broom - all roads are there

Ants in a birdcage - there are many ways

Ants talk - meet each other

Ants urinate in books - not many words can be read/p> >

The ant drags the millstone - a waste of effort

The ant stabs the neck - not a bleeding tube

The ant drags the mouse - the heart is full but the strength is insufficient

Ants move - everyone talks

Ants pick up insects - everyone works hard

Ant carries a mantis on its back - shouldering a heavy responsibility

Ant cuts its head with a knife ——Without flesh and blood

Ant eats fireflies—it shines in the belly

Ant wears chaff—so shameless

Ant moves Mount Tai—Part 2 Too cruel

The ant carries the big tree - not overconfident

The ant wears a hat on his head - he wears a hat randomly

The ant meets the chicken - he deserves it

Grasshoppers carrying bricks on the bean rack - using the big frame to scare people

Grasshoppers carrying bricks - unable to bear the energy

Grasshoppers fighting roosters - overestimating their abilities

p>

The grasshopper sneezes - his mouth is full of grassy smell

The grasshopper gets on the bean rack - the little thing uses the big rack to scare people

The body of the grasshopper - the cartilage

When a locust sees blood, it bites (and stares) and doesn’t let go

Ant blocks the road—it doesn’t overturn

Ant has a sharp point when it catches a cow— Thinking you have climbed to a high mountain

Ant talks - meeting

Ant moves - either a phoenix or rain

A grasshopper climbs a bean rack - borrows a small thing The big frame is scary

Ants look at the sky - not knowing the height

Ants climb trees - Luzi Township

Ants drink water - just a drop is enough

Ants go into the pond - they don't know the depth

Ants go into the cell - they have their own way out

The buried mines - they are about to explode

Buying back a color TV and bringing back an invoice - well-founded

Buying salted fish and releasing them alive - committing an injustice

Buying a box and returning pearls - not knowing the goods

Selling clothes to buy wine - caring about one's mouth but not one's body

Selling one's son to recruit son-in-law - doing it upside down

Selling one's dog's coat to buy pants--not too short-sighted No man

Selling his son to recruit a son-in-law——Hu Tossing

Selling a child to sing a big show——What kind of achievement is he celebrating

A water seller looking at the big river—— It’s all money

Those who sell frying spoons - choose the ones that are reliable

Selling rice without rice - with bad intentions (quality)

Those who sell fried spoons Losing money - being greedy for stalls) is big

The crab seller goes on stage - there are many roles, but not many can sing

Selling wooden heads and being robbed by thieves - big shame

The one who sells earthenware basins - he wants one set and one set

The one who sells earthenware basins stumbles - he gets confused

The one who sells shrimps doesn't use a scale - Catch the blind (shrimp)

The salt seller drinks boiled water - tasteless

The coffin seller grits his teeth - hates people to death

The steamed bun seller mixes lime - His expression remains unchanged

The one who sells bean sprouts shakes his basket - clean and tidy

The one who sells oil does not add salt - does not care about (nothing)

The one who sells fried dough sticks Huqin——You (oil) hand is leisurely (string)

Selling cattle and hair to marry a mute——Nothing

You can talk about it

The tofu seller talks about the fragrant flowers - the business is not big and the business is big.

The flower seller talks about the fragrance of the flowers; the tea seller talks about the freshness of the vegetables - each has his own way.

The duck seller changed the basket - pouring (making) eggs

Bought wheat to make a basket - not steaming the steamed buns to steam (competing) the weather

The water seller looked at the big river - it was full of money

Wheat straw blew fire - stingy

The wheat awns poked into the eyes - stinging and painful

Wheat The chaff is rubbing the rope - no match for the hand

Kowtowing in the wheat stubble field - poking the eyes

Wheat straw holding the door - in vain

The wheat straw is used as a scale - - Use the straw as a scale - look at people too lowly

In the wheat straw Looking down on people - looking down upon them

Packed explosives in the wheat straw - fired off cannons indiscriminately

Swallowed the charcoal - became mute

The person pretending to be Qin Hui did not take off his costume - Who hasn’t seen that two-flowered face

The sky is covered with paste - Hu (Hu) Cloud

The sky is full of coptis - endless suffering

The sun is full of gold teeth - every mouth is a lie (yellow)

The garden is full of fruits - just you are red

The mouse covered in oil dives into the fire - How can it be better

The blind man plays Pai Gow - blindly touching

The blind man opens the day - talks nonsense

The blind man chats - talks nonsense

The blind man bought a trumpet and blew it one by one

The blind man used a lantern to illuminate others but not himself

The blind man wore glasses to show off

( The metaphor is just in name but has no actual effect)

A blind man rides a blind horse and rushes into chaos

A cat does not eat fish and is pretending to be polite

Cat. Catching mice...an ancestral craft

Cats catch mice and dogs guard the door——. Everyone keeps his/her duty

(Metaphorically speaking, everyone has their own responsibilities.)

The cat teaches the tiger - keep one hand

The cat drills the dog The hole is easy to pass through

The cat drills the mouse hole-cannot pass

The cat catches the mouse-relies on its own ability

The owl sings~...a strange sound

The donkey pulls the grindstone...he can't escape from this circle

Eating cantaloupe in the toilet...it doesn't smell good

The stones in the pit...it smells bad Hard

Comparing yourself to a dagger means having a bad reputation and having a stubborn attitude/

Throwing a bomb in a manhole... arousing public outrage (dung)

Comparing yourself to yourself arouses everyone Dissatisfaction/

An electric fan is installed in the toilet...~it will stink in the limelight

Putting roses in the toilet...cannot produce any fragrance

Big dung maggots in the toilet - —Survival in death (shit)

Peacock in the pit - smelly tune

Weighing weight in the pit - natural and hard

Nothing to do Shoe insole - belittled to the end

Impersonation - pretending to be real

Pipa without strings - where to start playing (talking)

Floating without roots Ping - helpless

Toothless wife gnaws bones - by licking

Put coal briquettes in lime - black and white distinct

Coal ash mixed with lime ——No distinction between black and white

Firecrackers on eyebrows——Fire (disaster) in front of eyes

Gourmets talk about food and clothing

Mei Lan Farewell My Concubine - A good show

(Metaphor for the best skill J

Looking at people through the crack in the door-Shu people look down on them

(Metaphor Look down on people.)

The bricks under the threshold are kicked in and out one by one

(This is a metaphor for pushing and pushing someone who doesn’t want it.

)

Looking at the sky through the crack in the door - narrow vision

Pooping on the threshold - smelly inside and out

The seal on the door - cannot be pulled

p>

The broom behind the door - specializing in dirty things to do

The weight in the corner of the door - a dead (real) mind

Behind the door to wipe dead people - on tenterhooks

The door frame is stripped off and looks like a big one

Hang a mat on the door - outrageous (painting)

Look at people through the crack in the door - look down on people

Being kept in the dark and listening to the thunder - not being able to figure out the north, south, east, west, etc.

(A metaphor for being confused and confused about the direction.)

Covered with a quilt Fart - swallow alone

(Metaphor for possessing alone)

Meng Jiangnu pulled her bangs - crying and laughing

(Metaphor for someone who is happy) , there are also sad ones)

Meng Huo’s surrender—orally convinced

Meng Jiangnu is looking for her husband—travelling thousands of miles

Eating honey in a dream—thinking sweetly

(It is a metaphor for a beautiful idea, but it may not be realized.)

Flying on a plane in a dream - thinking too hard

(A metaphor for an idea that is far from reality. , can't come true)

Getting money in a dream - blindly happy

Having a wife in a dream - a beautiful thought

Getting married in a dream - a good thing Nope

The words spoken in the dream - I don’t know whether they are true or not

The groom spoken in the dream - an empty wedding

Maitreya Buddha - smile every day

p>

Rice sieve crotch sunlight - cannot be covered

Sleeping in rice sieve - covered with eyes

Rice sieve filled with water - many loopholes

Cook rice into porridge - confused

Rice shop sells salt - meddle in nosy (salty) things

Wash your face in the rice soup basin - confused head

The rice pot has just started to draw firewood and rice - no cooperation at the critical moment

Rice soup to wash your hair - extremely confused

The mouse in the rice barn - no need to worry about having nothing to eat

Sealed cans - seamless and drillable

Sealed drinks - watertight

Sealed wax balls - no flaws

Cotton fell in Water - bombing (talking) is not possible

There is a needle in the cotton - soft but hard

(A metaphor for both soft and hard methods.)

Roll the dough with sesame seeds - stand still a little

Butter your hands - dip a little of everything you touch

Boil longevity peaches in the noodle soup - the bastard is sharp

Boil a ball in noodle soup - say you are a bastard and full of anger

Boil a light bulb in noodle soup - say you are a bastard and full of evil fire

The monk in the temple Zhong Yiming ( Famous and famous)

The wooden fish in the temple - grinning from ear to ear

The *heads in the temple - each has his own master

(the metaphors have all been Owned by everyone, nothing extra)

The flagpole on the temple gate - a bachelor

The stone lions in front of the temple - a pair

(metaphor) The two people have a close relationship)

The five hundred Arhats in the temple - each has a certain status

Crossing the river by feeling for the stones - it is more prudent

(A metaphor for doing things cautiously, steadily and reliably)

The magician does tricks - making something out of nothing

The donkey in the grinding tunnel... spins in circles

The donkey on the grinding mill - one by one Turn around