A joke! !

A cold joke: I sent a girl to charge the phone bill.

1. "Girl, do you like reading?" "I like it." "Uncle likes to see you, too." A bad smell came on my face. )

M: Shall I take you to play by motorcycle after work? Woman: You can't add "baby" to these words. You don't know anything about amorous feelings. Man: Shall I take you to ride my precious motorcycle after work? (teasing her boyfriend, the identification is completed. )

When I was a child, I went to the factory to steal iron bars and sell them. I'm afraid the security guard at the door will suspect us. So each of us took an iron bar and started a group fight. We rushed out of the factory and the security guards hid in the house. We always rush to the scrap yard ... (Sao nian, you are so witty! )

4. Classmate A: Have you finished your homework? Classmate B: Hey ... What are you sighing about? I want to discuss it with my teacher. I have saved winter vacation homework. I have feelings. Can I not hand it in? What a deep feeling, it is hard to give up. )

It is said that fools move mountains. On this day, Gong Yu felt that he was dying, so he called all his descendants, and then took his son's hand and said with a trembling voice: Move the mountain ~ Move the mountain ~ My son immediately went on to say: Bright ~ Crystal ~ Crystal, full ~ days ~ all ~ are ~ small ~ stars, dad, you are out of tune ~ Gong Yu is dead .. (Son, you are the one invited by silly boy. )

6. One of my colleagues sprayed three words on the outside of his tool cabinet and helmet. From then on, everyone called him Wang Jiudan. One day, a leader also called: Wang Jiudan came over. He ran over with a fart and said with a smile: What do you want with me? The leader turned blue when he thought about it. From then on, Wang Jiudan called everyone brothers. )

7. The canteen doesn't accept cash recently. A buddy went to eat and took out 20 yuan. Aunt in the canteen waved and said no. The buddy paused, said thank you, and then left with the meal. (Where is it? I also go to eat Lei Feng's meal)

8. "Is there any foul language in The Big Bang Theory?" "No" "Do you have a large dew point lens?" "No" "Is there any sensitive content that is not harmonious?" "no" "where did you break the ban?" "The title of the play. Is this the age when you can get pregnant by holding hands?

9. If a fat girl has been buying loose, fleshy clothes with hips and thighs since she got fat, she will still be a fat girl after half a year; But if she buys short, tight, smaller clothes from the beginning, then look, after half a year, she will become a very conspicuous fat man in the crowd. Guess the beginning, but can't guess the end! I thought it would make me thinner. )

10. I went back to this city on business with a younger brother. In my car, I called my wife. "Wife, I will be home tomorrow morning. ...... "Just talking about the automatic cruise in my car" You have entered the XX district of XX city. " My brother is very stupid. What I admire is that he actually said, "Fuck, this stupid car, I want to surprise my wife. You ruined it. Oh, my wife, I will go home soon and wait for me. Oh, dear. " You're a fucking master. You can sit still! (The original joke is to sit still! Sorry, I'm possessed again. )

1 1. After watching Journey to the West, my daughter refused to squat down to urinate. My mother quickly asked why, and my daughter said, "What if my father-in-law peeks?" Mother smiled: "The mother-in-law is in charge of the land and dare not peek." What a witty hemp. )

12. A man charged the phone bill wrong, and the other party was a sister. He is also very generous, saying that fate does not have to be returned. Talk slowly and finally get the license. Whenever people ask how they met, the man shows off in an ostentatious manner: on the phone. (Then I'll charge the phone bill, too. )