Do you have any traffic jokes? I want one.

1, a 6-year-old nephew, ate the dried spicy and hot fish from Beihai just sent by a dozen friends, and suddenly asked me to pour him a cup of warm water, thinking that he was spicy, but the boy didn't drink water and grabbed two pieces of food with his hand. After eating, he let go of his two fingers to catch fish. Thought: the boy is smart and knows to wash his hands with warm water. I didn't know that this product picked up the water glass and drank it at one gulp, but it was in no hurry to stop the lingering of this product and said, "So I can eat spicy food." Eat spicy food ... drink spicy food ... whether it's wood or not.

2. A cheating woman is like money falling on a stone. It's a pity not to be embarrassed, but it's disgusting.

Everyone has seen the word "who is it" in chat rooms and qq. When ordinary young people see these two words, their ears will think of "Who says in their ear that they love me forever ..." When young artists see these two words, their ears will think of "Who is knocking at my window ..." But when young people in B see these two words, their ears will think of "Who is singing to warm their loneliness ..."

4, our dormitory, surnamed Jiang, Once, the mobile phone disappeared, so I asked other people in the dormitory to make a phone call to see where it was. Another person teased her, saying that she could not be found in the address book. This wonderful girl said, why not? If you find chicken (J), you will find me.

5. "Are all men in Sydney depressed?" "Why?" "Brother Sydney has a lot of complaints ~"

A girl invited me to see a movie yesterday. "really! Did you promise? " "no" "why? ! ""She asked me to visit her house, not the cinema! Too insincere! !

7. China Milk Association said: China's infant milk powder standard is the strictest in the world, and its quality is better than that of imported milk powder. This is the coldest joke I heard during the May Day holiday this year.

8. Today, I chatted with a female friend. When I was excited, she said to me: You must be a good woman in the next life! I was surprised: Why? ! ..... because of your bunker! ! ..... Bunker ... Fortress ... This ...

9. The lawn of university campus is always trampled by people, and the logistics teacher has set up many warning slogans, but the effect is not obvious. Finally, the teacher finally came up with a coup, and no one is allowed to step on the lawn from now on. The sign says: step on one and hang one.

10, the difference of a woman's wit lies in: give her a candle, some feel that there is still a cake missing, and some feel that there is still a whip missing. ...........

1 1. Some people always send a "Are you there" on QQ, and then wait for your reply "Yes", but they never say a word, as if they have disappeared from this time and space. I really want to drag this kind of person out of the computer and slap him hard: "Yes, yes, yes, I said yes!" " Finish the second fucking sentence! "

12, Eason Chan's "Elimination" Why do I always sing "I can only say that I am thin, maybe you are fat ..."

13, traveling to Thailand, I changed my underwear in the bathroom last night, because I thought the bathroom was not clean, so I put the changed underwear in my coat pocket first, ready to go out and put it away, and I fucking forgot! I came to Thailand today, and we still walk together. The girl next to me asked me if I had any paper towels. I felt my pocket was bulging, so I agreed, and then I took out a pair of underwear from my pocket in full view! ! Leave me alone and let me die! ! ! ! !

14, Xiang Yu was tightly surrounded by Liu Bang and was in trouble. At night, Xiang Yu heard Chu songs playing in all directions and was startled: "Who is singing!" " Yu Ji was stunned: "Warm ... warm and lonely?" ? ""White clouds and blue sky are still there! " "Tears are gone with the wind?" "Living alone in that vast place!" "Look at the splendid fireworks in the distant heaven! "

15, there is no such thing as running 800 meters! Before running: I can't run! What to do! Yes! I can't run either! Wait, slow down! Run together! Run together! Yeah, yeah, let's run! Really have to run.

When we walked, we agreed not to be stupid when we ran together! Everyone rushed to the front! I don't care about you! People catch up with you, combative, as if they never knew you! !

16, I think the world is really small. Your primary school classmates are your junior high school classmates, your senior high school classmates are your junior high school classmates, your senior high school classmates are your junior high school classmates, and your junior high school classmates are your junior high school classmates. Actually, everyone knows each other. . . . . .

17, the bell rang and the classroom was still noisy. As soon as the teacher struck the table, he immediately became quiet. Then the teacher shouted, didn't you hear the bell ring? After a silence, a deep voice came from the corner of the classroom: paralysis, when did you hear the bell?

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Hello, hope to adopt!