Funny quotes to describe appearance

1. You look so damn easy to recognize.

2. You look very brutal!

3. You look too much as you want.

4. Not bad, can distinguish facial features.

5. Look yourself in the mirror!

6. You look so easy to recognize.

7. You look really post-modern.

8. You look like a poor person.

9. International faces are universal.

10. You act very brutally!

11. You need to reinvent the wheel.

12. Your appearance is very refreshing!

13. You look so Western-style.

14. You are so beautiful!

15. Your appearance really challenges aesthetics!

16. The magic of flying sand and moving rocks.

17. You look amazing. Be creative!

18. You look like a car accident scene.

19. Damn, you look so damn easy to recognize.

20. When I see you, I will be silent from now on!

21. You are so tall that you can turn around!

22. Were you kissed by a pig when you were a child?

23. It looks very sci-fi and very abstract!

24. The long flying sand and stones are uncanny workmanship.

25. Why are you covering your face with your butt!

26. Frankly speaking, you look very poor.

27. Your facial features are poorly organized!

28. To be honest, how many times have you failed in plastic surgery?

29. You look so creative and live so courageously!

30. You will make aesthetes despair, brother.

31. Just by looking at your appearance, I can tell that you have been scared by ghosts.

32. Who chewed you and then spit it out?

33. Your appearance is out of proportion.

34. You are very patriotic, dedicated and strong-willed.

35. Which kind person gave birth to you?

36. Your appearance exceeds human imagination.

37. Your appearance is not correct and your proportions are not right.

38. Just by looking at your appearance, I know you will die badly.

39. I am really sorry for the conscience of heaven and earth when I say you are handsome!

40. You look unscrupulous and confident!

41. "Looping forward and backward" is used to describe your head.

42. You look very patriotic, very dedicated, and very courageous!

43. It’s hard to dream of a face. (It’s hard to imagine in your dreams)

44. You look very patriotic, very dedicated, and very strong-minded.

45. You are slowing down the Internet speed and consuming too much memory.

46. No matter how ugly you are, you can be ugly, just not like you!

47. If you look like this, why doesn’t the Environmental Protection Bureau give you any trouble?

48. I would like to use ambiguity to describe your appearance.

49. How did you get to Earth? Go back to your Mars!

50. Brother, could you lower the resolution on your face?

51. MMD, I have never seen anything so long and of archaeological value.

52. Were you ever kissed by a cow when you were a child? It’s absolutely amazing!

53. She looked at him with regret and said: Can the surgery be restored?

54. He looks very innocent, but he looks sorry for the people and the party.

55. The length is abstract enough, and I understand that people can also grow like this. .

56. Your five elements lack gold, your life lacks love, and your horoscope lacks one stroke.

57. Why can people’s faces look so weird?

58. Seeing you, I really admire the uncanny workmanship of nature.

59. I look very innocent, but I look sorry for the people and the party.

60. It’s not your fault that you look ugly, but it’s your fault that you look scary.

61. You haven’t fully evolved yet, so it’s really hard for you to look like a human being.

62. You look like a Harley. (The name of a comet, seeing it once in a lifetime is enough)

63. You may not look like much at first glance, but upon closer inspection you are not as good as at first glance.

64. When you were a child, were you bitten by a pig or pinched by a door? So brave

65. If you chase me naked for two kilometers and I look back, I will be considered a hooligan!

66. If you look at me from the back, you can buy whatever you want to eat. If you look at me from the front, I won’t let you buy anything I eat.

67. You did nothing wrong! We can only blame Darwin’s theory of evolution for this!

68. It’s not easy to grow like this. It absorbs a lot of cosmic rays, right? You can tell!

69. I want to open a weight loss restaurant, and I want to hang your portrait in the most conspicuous position.

70. I have seen ugly people, but never such ugly ones. It looks ugly at first glance, but it gets even uglier upon closer inspection!

71. The ancients have never been seen before, and the newcomers have never been seen since. Thinking of the tranquility of heaven and earth, I shed tears with sadness!

72. How could you look like this? It scared Sadako to death. How are you going to film the sequel!

73. Brother, if Mr. Zhu Guangqian sees you, he will definitely give up his aesthetic research!

74. Emptiness is color, and form is emptiness. You can’t see me, you can’t see me, you can’t see me

75. I will be heartbroken when I see you, because my one thought and impulse ruined your life!

76. Your photos will definitely sell well. I will be your manager. Why? Because it can ward off evil spirits!

77. I think there are only two kinds of people in the world who can attract people, one is very beautiful and the other is like you.

78. You look like a beautiful girl from a distance, but you look like a Jurassic dinosaur from up close! (The last words of a boy with a thousand degrees of myopia)

79. You look like a historical celebrity. The person on the first page of the first volume of the junior high school history textbook. (Peking Man)

80. I stayed away from the world and came to the ancient castle. I asked the magic mirror: Mirror, mirror, who is the ugliest in the world? The magic mirror shed tears and committed suicide

81. I shouted to the sky: God, am I the ugliest? The sky suddenly poured heavily, and it fell on my body. I touched it, and it was all vomit.

82. I don’t want to hit you anymore. You go to the zoo to see if there is a suitable job for you. You can easily be shot by the police if you run around on the street like this.

83. I want to watch you talk, but why do you bury your face in your butt? oh? Sorry, I didn't know that was your face, so where did your ass go?

84. How can they call you a pig? This is outrageous! You can't just call someone whatever their parents look like! How can you say you look like a pig? That's an insult to the pig.

85. You are so ugly that you are creative, you are earth-shatteringly ugly, you are so ugly that people lose their yang energy, you are so ugly that the sun burns down the entire solar system, you are so ugly that humans dare not have children anymore. .

86. Your eyes should be closer together, your ears should be farther back, your nose should be more upturned, your mouth should be more symmetrical, and your hair should be more balanced.

That's their place for eyes and noses!

87. I cried at night and asked softly to the moon: Am I good-looking? A white object fell gently on the moon. I picked it up and saw that it was a little white rabbit that was crushed to death by Jiuyin's white bone claws

88. The World Lying Contest begins, and contestants of all races are unprecedented. After boasting and talking wildly, I walked onto the stage and only said three words to win the championship and keep the title forever. I said: I am not ugly. Classic Philosophical Funny Quotations - Funny Quotations

When will the bright moon come? I asked my roommate for a drink. I wonder if the handsome guy next door has a girlfriend?

Although I am not very handsome, when I was a child, some people praised me for having an idol on the left side of my nostril.

Mom’s advice: Girl, you have to eat appropriately to lose weight!

Spring is the season when colds and emotions are most common. Some people accidentally catch a cold, while others accidentally fall in love. I belong to the former.

I was also an infatuated person back then, but it rained and I drowned.

Money is not everything, sometimes it is necessary

I allow you to enter my world, but you will never be allowed to walk around in my world.

God, did you let summer and winter live together? ! What a hell of a weather!

Big birds can be found in any forest!

Don’t be afraid of enemies who are like tigers, but be afraid of teammates who are like pigs.

Summer is just not good. When I was poor, I didn’t even have to drink the northwest wind...

It’s up to you!

Don’t come to me if you have nothing to do, and don’t come to me if something happens.

Do you think I will watch you die? I'll close my eyes.

The reason why angels can fly is because they take themselves very lightly...

I want to fall in love early, but it is too late...

Please Don’t speak English in front of me in the future, okay?

I hope that one day I can double-click my wallet with the mouse, then select a hundred dollar bill, press "CTRLC". Then keep "CTRLV"

I am a lonely tree The tree has been standing by the roadside for thousands of years, waiting lonely, just for one day when you walk by me, I will fall for you. If I can’t smash you, my life will be in vain.

If you love me, please raise your hands; if you don’t love me, please stand on your head.

Never hang yourself from a tree. You can try it several times on the surrounding trees.

Don’t set your bank card password to your girlfriend’s birthday, otherwise it will be a lot of trouble to change it.

The happiest thing: sleeping until you wake up naturally. Counting money makes my hands cramp. The saddest thing: sleeping until my hands cramp, counting money until I wake up naturally.

Money can buy a house but not a home, it can buy a marriage but not love, it can buy a clock but not time. Money is not everything, but the source of pain.

Everyone wants to be different from others, but the result is that everyone is the same.

When we are young, we often make faces in the mirror. When we are old, the mirror is even.

A gentleman pretends to be dead to be a confidant, and a woman undergoes plastic surgery to please someone who pleases her.

If being rich is also a mistake, I would rather make the same mistake again and again.

People are afraid of being famous and pigs are afraid of being strong, men are afraid of being poor and women are afraid of being fat.

The effect of contraception: If it fails, you will become a 'person'.

Asking you how much sorrow you can have is like a group of eunuchs going to a brothel.

Sleep is an art – no one can stop me from pursuing art.

If marriage is the tomb of love, then I expect someone to bury me.

I am not a casual person. When I am casual, I am not a human being.

To be a human being, you have to be a person who hovers between cow A and cow C.

How many thoughts do you have? As far as you can, roll as far as you can

Lie down wherever you fall

Pregnancy is like pregnancy, it takes a long time for people to notice it.

Lovers will eventually get married

Your ugliness has nothing to do with your face...

If a tree doesn’t want its bark, it will definitely die; if a person doesn’t have a face, it will be invincible.

When I give birth to a son in the future, I want to name him "So Handsome." Then when people see me, they will say, "What a handsome dad."

Work, take a step back, the sky is brighter, love, If you step back, you will be empty.

The highest level of work is to watch others work and receive other people's wages.

Money is not the problem, the problem is lack of money!

When I'm drunk, I won't accept anyone, so I just hold on to the wall.

I'm like a fly lying on the glass, with a bright future but no way out.

< p> Senior brother, do you know? The meat of the second senior brother is now more expensive than the master’s meat

If eating more fish can make people smarter, then you have to eat at least a pair of whales... …

When the water is clear, there will be no fish, and when the people are humble, they will be invincible.

Youth is like toilet paper. It seems that there is quite a lot of it, but when you use it, it is not enough.

< p> Friends around me, please hurry up and become famous, so that my memoirs can sell well

A female classmate was too dark, and her boyfriend was too fair. One day, there was a vicious tongue in the dormitory. The queen suddenly said to her: "You can't do this, you will give birth to zebras"

I have always regarded handsome men and money as dirt, and they have always regarded me this way

< p> Don’t be lazy with me, I am too lazy to compare with you

God said, let there be light, I said I was against it, and from then on there was darkness in the world

My name is God , my nickname is Jesus, my English name is God, my dharma name is Tathagata...

The farmer’s three punches hurt a little

In fact, I have always been very popular: when I was a child, everyone loved me , now I am loved by bitches

I am not afraid of enemies who are like tigers, but I am afraid of teammates who are like pigs

Go your own way and let others take a taxi (Go other people’s way, Let others be cornered

The rat carries the knife and looks for the cat in the street

As long as you work hard and poop seriously

Who is the fastest? (Cao Cao? Not Liu Xiang). Because it is said that Cao Cao arrived

Only when there is a long queue at the train station can one truly realize that he is the "descendant of the dragon".

Spring is coming, and a group of wild geese are here. Flying north, sometimes forming a B-shaped formation, sometimes forming a T-shaped formation

If the tiger doesn't show its power, you think I'm HELLOKITTY!

Donkeys can't be fooled

p>

The highest level of self-service: support the wall to get in, support the wall to get out.

If I don’t have money or power, I won’t be nice to you.

Can you take it with me? I'm a scholar.

Go to Google and search Baidu.

Women must be kind to themselves. Once you are exhausted, another woman will spend your money, live in your room, sleep with your husband, and beat your baby!

Grandpas are descendants of grandsons...

Get away as far as your thoughts lead!

It’s been a long time since anyone has made cowhide look so fresh and refined!

Boss, is money really that important to you? I talked for more than three hours and didn’t get a penny drop?

When I woke up, it was dark.

If I became the HR manager, the first thing I would do would be to promote myself to the position of boss.

I spend all my time except eating every day trying to lose weight, and you still say I don’t have perseverance?

I won’t tell you even if I beat you to death.

No problem that money can solve is a problem.

After studying for more than ten years, I think it is easier to get along in kindergarten!

You even believe the advertisements. Are you stupid by reading?

How can you have the energy to lose weight if you don’t eat enough?

The early bird catches the worm, and the early bird catches the worm.

Oh my god, my clothes have lost weight again!

Water can carry a boat and cook porridge.

Buying a computer but not having broadband is like having all the food and wine prepared but becoming a monk before eating.

There is a very old legend - those who can see beautiful women on XX campus will live forever

Life is easy; life is easy; life is not easy.

My name on my girlfriend’s mobile phone is “him”. After we broke up, I became “it”.

I am different from you because I am human.

I only drink pure water and pure milk, so I am very simple.

When God gives us youth, he also gives us acne.

When problems arise, first look for the cause within yourself. Don’t blame the earth’s lack of gravity for constipation.

Boys must be poor, otherwise they will not know how to struggle; girls must be rich, otherwise they will coax them away with a piece of cake.

Destiny is responsible for shuffling the cards, but it is ourselves who play the cards!

Loving others is a kind of helplessness, being loved is a kind of posture, waiting for love is a kind of expectation, and being without love is a kind of ability.

The beauty of a woman lies in being stupid and having no regrets. The beauty of a man lies in lying and telling lies. Funny Quotes

1. People come and go and say that you two are crazy, but you have to say: Our image spokespersons are Haier brothers.

2. Looking at your shabby face and big pimples all over your face, you still insist on saying that it was prickly heat caused by wearing a mask during the SARS period.

3. A group of wild geese are flying south. When I saw your face, I turned around and jumped up. Look how intimidating you look.

4. Ah, it’s okay. When I visit the grave during the Qingming Festival, I suddenly think of you and wonder why you haven’t died yet so many people have died.

5. I am surprised that a rare species like yours should be listed as a national first-level protected animal and exhibited at the World Expo.

6. Maybe you can also contribute to our country’s scientific research on extraterrestrial species.

7. You should be pulled out of the chicken coop immediately and put in prison!

8. Let me tell you from the bottom of my heart, you can support a brothel. .

9. I am not perfect, but I am honest and natural, how about you.

10. If someone scolds you, just say it again! If you dare, say it again. If he continues to scold you, say, you are so good. Just say it, he will definitely scold you. Just say it, say it again, if you dare, say it a thousand times or ten thousand times. If he doesn't speak, you can say, don't dare to say yes, don't be so arrogant in the future, and then you can leave.

11. A new generation of washing powder, a new generation of people! A new generation of dog men and women make love without closing the door! Why not close the door? There is a man outside the door! What is a man like? Just like you !

12. It’s not your fault to be ugly, but it’s your fault to scare people!

13. Your mother is loved by everyone!~! Cars meet cars! ~!~The lid of the coffin will be opened when seeing your mother!

14. If you are told that you are stupid, you will be stupid, and you will use your vest as a pair of pants. Haha~~Absolutely stupid!

15. No matter what the other person says, you always answer that there is a green vegetable in your tooth.

16. If the other person says, nonsense, I If you didn't eat any vegetables today, you would be surprised and say, "It turns out they were from yesterday, and so on."

17. Because that is very common, if the other party speaks first. Funny Quotes to Teach You How to Calmly Swear

18. Seeing that you look like a dog in the clothes you wear every day, why don’t you do something human?

19. You still follow the fashion and get a middle part. Can you please take a look at your 38-point haircut?

20. Nongfu Spring, who drinks his own tap water every day, still feels that he is living a rather bourgeois life, right?

21. I say that my man is a two-legged man. You man, it seems that your man is a three-legged toad.

22. Don’t be so old all day long. When your family is sexually hungry, go find Wangcai next door.

23. You can say, do you want to eat it? I can give it to you.

24. Don’t always ask why others don’t want to talk to you or talk to you. Is it true that they don’t want to talk to you because they care too little about you? Do you believe it?

25. I don’t want to judge people by their appearance. I also tried hard to see your soul, but in the end your soul is not more beautiful than your appearance.

26. Why doesn’t the country use your face to research bulletproof vests?

27. Can I ask you for a few faces? I think you have three layers of face. It's three layers, so it shouldn't matter if there are a few missing pictures.

28. If others scold you, "You are a sister," you can say, "I have no sister."

29. Are you treating dichlorvos as cola and amusing your eighty cents and twelve pound head?

30. It’s a pity that you don’t become a soldier. You are so ugly, and most of the people died when you were released on the battlefield.

31. Even nuclear bombs are saved , if you had been born a few years earlier, there would have been no Nanjing Massacre.

32. If I want to give birth to a child, I must ask you to teach him, and also teach him history. One look at your face, and I will remember all the five thousand years of China.

33. Go home and take a good look in the mirror to see how many green onions you have on your head. If not, buy a few and stick them in your head to pretend to be green onions.

34. Your parents are happy because of you, because you are so much like them that you don’t look like a bought child.

35. You and your dad stood on Qianmenlouzi Street wearing underpants in the middle of winter with a cigarette in your mouth.

36. You are definitely your mother’s biological child, otherwise you would How could my mother raise such a bastard like you!

37. Do you want someone to beat me? Call out all the cats and dogs in your village.

38. Don’t say that, she is just like a flower, but since she became a flower, there is no more cow dung.

39. Don’t use bad language at all times. You have your mother in your pocket and say it casually.

40. If the teacher hadn’t told you not to throw garbage anywhere, I would have thrown you away.

41. You are also developing sustainably, from this school to this school now.

42. You say I’m jealous of you, you little guy. Wipe the shit out of your eyes.

43. Besides not being as shameless as you, what else do you have? Desolate.

44. Are you saying that your mother’s mistress is so coquettish that you can’t be happy until your mother hurts you? There are so many cowards.

45. How much I want to talk about quality with you, but I can’t stand you even if I endure shit or piss.

46. Are you worthy of talking about quality? Don’t worry about chewing your tongue. Didn't you drop it? It doesn't matter how good a dog is when it barks. Only when you bite me can you be considered powerful.

47. Seeing you hanging around men every day, who would like to see you and throw a bone at you?

48. I think you are very good at it13, don’t Forgot what kind of dog you were back then.

49. Seeing you pretending to be weak day by day, I immediately understood what it means to be a young lady and a maid.

50. If you are raised by a mother but not educated by a mother, I will teach you how to poke people. 45 Classic Funny Quotations - Funny Quotations

When I was a child, people selling popsicles and ice cream would usually push bicycles. Once, I heard an aunt in the house shouting: The new ice cream is hot.

(I guess my aunt used to sell fried cakes and fried dough sticks

One day I went to a classmate’s house for dinner and drank some wine. Her father suddenly came in. She originally wanted to call her uncle, but it turned out that she was wrong.

Said: "Dad, come and sit down!"~~Han! A lot of classmates were laughing so hard. Space Diary

Once at a KTV, I asked for a song, and a girl shouted loudly: Order a song for me. "Double Jaylen"

In the past, when the exam teacher handed out papers, the girl behind him took an extra sheet and shouted, "Teacher, I have it, I have it." As a result, the boy sitting next to him said, "Yes. Mine, it's mine." The whole class was shocked~~~ I can't help it, who told me that I like to be lazy at work?

My friend's child is half a year old. I called to care about it. After a few words of greeting, Here comes a sentence: Should your child take human milk or your milk?

One evening, I met an acquaintance and said, "Good morning."

In the evening, one day The roommate came into the room and announced loudly: "Today I'm watching the midnight version of The Ring!"

Due to a business trip opportunity, I had to go to the Bank of China somewhere to repair equipment. After getting out of the hotel and getting into a taxi, I said The female driver said: "Go to the Bank of China and find a hardware store to buy a knife." Sigh! I meant to buy a screwdriver at that time. I didn't notice that I said it wrong. At this time, the female driver kept looking at me very aggrieved. He said, "Brother, I have to get off work. You can take a taxi again." I was very angry at that time and said viciously: "Why are you parking your car at the hotel when you get off work?" The female driver looked at me and was about to collapse. He said, "Brother, I don't want to pay for the car anymore. You can find another one." Then I realized that I was wrong, and I quickly explained for a long time. Now that I think about it, I feel sorry for the female driver. < /p>

A politics teacher once said during a lecture: "Let me give you an example." Then he felt something was wrong and said again: "Let me give you an example."

When I was in junior high school, the teacher asked the translator Who is this man? A classmate translated: Whose man is this? The whole class laughed, and the teacher was speechless.

During the politics class, the topic of Sino-Japanese political issues was mentioned, and the teacher introduced it. Said: "Japanese samurai all had caesarean sections before they died~~~"

When I was in college, a classmate of mine just bought a mobile phone and applied for a mobile card. He called the 1860 service station to ask, and he was so excited: May I know your address? The receptionist said politely on the speakerphone: "My husband was very thin." When he got anxious, he said, "Honey, you're as skinny as a pig!"

The original text of the broadcast: Two gangsters injured me and a 110 police officer fled. The announcer read: Two gangsters wounded me a hundred. Ten police officers fled afterwards (Huang Feihong's reincarnation!)

One of our colleagues said a classic saying to the examiner when he went to take the driver's license test: Report the instrument, the examiner is normal

I remember one time, I went to KFC with a girl, and while we were waiting in line, I heard her mumbling something like a chicken drumstick burger, a pair of chicken wings..., and finally it was her turn, and she made everyone laugh as soon as she opened her mouth. Man, she wanted to say, "Miss, let's have a chicken drumstick burger," but when she said it, she ended up saying, "Little legs, let's have a hamburger." Uncle, you are so trendy!

She told me about KFC’s new “bone and bone” (meat skewers with crispy bones) and asked me to take her to eat it. It was extremely hot in Beijing in those days, and I was groggy when I arrived at the restaurant.

I said to the smiling KFC lady: Please give me two "bloody" pieces, thank you! ........ Shameless_!

A boy saw his uncle and said, "Buy uncle, two dishes!" The uncle said, "This kid is such a big talker, he can't even talk to others!"

One was very shy. A shy male classmate went to the cafeteria to have breakfast. The chef at the window asked him: "What do you want?" He lowered his head and said: "I want...I want...a bun and a bun." The chef stared at him for a long time. , asked: "What do you want? Say it again!" "I want a bun and a bun...Oh. No! A bun and a bread!"

English class, teacher: "Good morning, Teacher!” Student: “Good morning student!” The whole class burst into laughter.

A classmate called his friend’s house, and the other party’s grandfather answered the phone. The classmate didn’t know what he was thinking, so he opened his mouth and said: “Grandpa, this is grandma...” Suddenly he felt something was wrong, and he suddenly Hang up the phone...

A buddy once made an appointment with the girl he had loved for a long time and was going to confess to her. The two of them sat in silence for a long time before he plucked up the courage to ask the girl: "Do you have a boyfriend?"

The girl shyly replied: "Not yet", and he was ecstatic: "Then can you be a boyfriend?" My boyfriend? ”

The wife asked reproachfully: You don’t even know your grandma’s name? The husband replied aggrievedly: How did I know? Grandma was only seven years old when I died.

Wife was surprised: What? The husband quickly changed his mind: No, no, I died when grandma was seven years old!

Before my mother went out to play mahjong, she told me: "Put all your clothes in the refrigerator and pick up all the vegetables in the washing machine."

Once I came out of my mother's place and went to my wife's place When I went there, after seeing my wife, I habitually called out: “Mom! "

The two people were arguing, and suddenly a person next to them said: "You are really full and have nothing to do! "

In the unit's congratulatory speech, a leader said: "I wish everyone good health..." He held it in and ran out of words.

The fourth boy in the dormitory got out of bed and looked for slippers for a long time, but there were none. Ask everyone: Why are my slippers gone?

I once went to buy mutton skewers. I stretched out four fingers and said to the boss, "Here are three mutton skewers." The boss was confused, "How many?" "I stretched out 3 fingers and said "4"...

My surname is Zhu, and I manage the computer room of my unit. Someone once called me on my mobile phone: "Chief Chicken Section, are you in the pig room? "I scolded that guy!

My parents were arguing, and my dad said angrily: "I'm going to get out of here!" "

I just entered college and was in military training. The company commander didn't know his accent and shouted the command - "Drill to the left! "Drill right!" ”

When I was in college, I heard a girl ordering: Master, stir-fry a plate of hot and sour shredded potatoes, without the potatoes!

When I was looking for a job, the examiner asked me which year I graduated. . I originally wanted to say the year 2000, but I got excited and said: "Two thousand years ago. . . What was even more shocking was that the examiner actually said, "A student of Confucius." ”

At a literary evening, the host came to the stage to announce: Please enjoy the following: Xinjiang singing and dancing, lift your skull! It’s so creepy!!!

If a tiger doesn’t respond to a cat, you should think of me. He is critically ill!

Me: “That’s our physics teacher. . . "Classmate: "What do you teach? ” Me: “Chemistry.” . . "

One day when I was in school, I received a phone call. After receiving the call, my classmate handed it to me and said, "Your mother is looking for you." "I picked up the phone and said casually: "Boy or girl." Everyone laughed wildly and I was laughed at. Even a beautiful woman who has been laughing for 4 years is worried about getting married. Man, let's see if I win.

Once, there was a classmate in the dormitory. When my mother called me, I was used to saying "He's not here", but this time what I wanted to say was "He's gone out". The result was: "He's... gone"

Deliver Give me a piece of ice cream, I take a bite and yell, "It burns me to death!" "

My sister and I went to Li Ning to buy shoes. My sister said, "Miss, how much do these shoes cost per pound? "

I went home on the weekend when I was in school. I got addicted to cigarettes after dinner and planned to use it as an excuse to go for a walk. When I was changing my shoes at the door, my dad asked me why I was going? I casually said: "Go and smoke!" "As a result, my dad found a pack of 555 from my body and beat me severely.

The teacher left me homework. I didn't know how to do it, so I copied other people's work. Then I went to the office to hand in my homework. I saw the teacher Said: "I've finished copying! ”

Our company has a car to pick up and drop off work in the morning. Because the car is not big, once, after I got on the car, there was no seat. A male colleague sitting next to me stood up and greeted her enthusiastically. : "So-and-so, sit on my ass! "I kept laughing until I got off the bus~!

When I was in college, a classmate and I were arguing about an issue. I was at a disadvantage for a moment. In desperation, I slammed the table and stood up and shouted: You are talking nonsense, I am not stupid!< /p>