Some stories related to fart

A teacher came to our office yesterday and said to borrow a space to have a rest. She said, "Just now, when I was invigilating, suddenly a student farted. It's too hot today, the air conditioner is on, the doors and windows are closed, and the room is full of stench. I think there seems to be a thick smoke in the room. The taste is choking ... "Her vivid language description instantly made us all feel immersive, and then we laughed our heads off.

This afternoon, there was a sudden "bang" fart on my left side, which was particularly abrupt in the silent venue. Then, someone laughed out loud. I want to look up at the source of fart. It suddenly occurred to me that Zhao's sketch "Farting at others, in fact, you let it go" I didn't dare to take the blame, so I sat for a long time honestly, and then slowly looked up and looked left. When I saw a man in front of me, I instantly remembered what Zhang said-every class has a child, and he looks like that. You think he let the whole class fart. At that moment, I really thought he farted. Then I couldn't help laughing again.

? The next meeting, I didn't feel bored at all. Memories of childhood come to mind. In the fourth grade of primary school, in Chinese class, students fart and then cause laughter from the students around them. The reason is that this fart is different from the other p's, and it actually sends out three syllables, boom-cheep-hmm. Then we all covered our noses and laughed, and then caught the teacher's attention. The teacher is also very interesting, and even thinks that farting in class is disturbing the classroom. Then she'll catch a fart. Farting itself is a trivial matter. In the end, no one dares to admit that he put it on himself, for fear of being labeled as "disturbing the class". As soon as the bell rang, everyone was relieved, and a class ended in a burst of laughter. Boys are still discussing that this fart should only exist in the sky and is rarely heard in the world. In fact, releasing a music P is in line with the subject characteristics of Chinese class. People who brag about fart. It is not known whether the farter is proud after listening to it. Later, a busybody looked up the Xinhua dictionary and read aloud the dictionary's explanation: "Fart is the smell produced by the intestine and discharged through the anus." In the next six months, "music P and the stench from anus" became the most difficult thing in our class.

? Coincidentally, in Humor and Jokes, I have seen such a joke-a person always farts at work, and his colleagues can't help but say, "Can you keep quiet?" Then I saw him sitting there trembling. Colleagues asked him what he was doing, and he replied, "I have tuned it to vibration now!" " "This is also a P that keeps pace with the times.

? In fact, fart is also a stalk that the ancients can't get around. Chen Meigong, a scholar in the Ming Dynasty, recorded in his book Popular Jokes that the guests of senior North Korean officials were used to flattering a big boss. One day, the senior official farted in public, and the guest asked, "Where did that sound come from?" The official said, "I farted." The guest was flattered. "I don't stink!" " "The official said," It's not good to hear that a good person's fart doesn't stink. The guest patted his hand and said, "I just smelled a bad smell!" " "This joke is to satirize those who are good at flattering and entertaining the public. Talking about p at the right time at the critical moment can still save lives. A scholar ran out of luck and went to see the prince, who accidentally farted. The scholar immediately presented an ode to Fart and said, "The golden buttocks are high and your breath rises, which seems to be the sound of nature and the smell of musk. I stood downwind and couldn't stand the smell. " Yan was very happy, gave the scholar a ten-year life and put back the dead at that time. Ten years later, the scholar saw Yan again. The scholar was very proud. He saw the Rosen Hall crumbling from a distance. The prince asked who this was, and the child said, "It's a scholar who writes fart articles." Praise: "This scholar is shameless when he smells fart, and he is shameless when he lives on. He was even worse than Guo Hongbo in the Tang Dynasty, and made money by eating dung. He is really a man with a long history!

? The ancients said that P was put out of modesty or discouragement. Foreigners divide their farts more carefully. In layman's terms, it is called fart; In elegant terms, it is called fart; Generally speaking, it is called ventilation. P is called "elegant spirit" in Chinese medicine. It's funny to think that a Chinese doctor with a gray beard feels the pulse-empty fart is cold, cold fart is empty. Vaguely, I seem to see my nephew as big as a meatball, with a big belly and pouting, saying, "Smelly fart doesn't ring, loud fart doesn't stink, and eating croton is loud and smelly." I once thought that the essence of fart was so clearly explained at an early age, and my little nephew was really a talent. Later, I learned that this is almost every child's jingle.

From chemical analysis, fart is mainly composed of carbon dioxide, hydrogen and methane. The chief culprit of odor is indole, fecal odor, hydrogen sulfide and other malodorous gases. Where's all that pent-up fart? One is that the gas is reabsorbed by the intestine, then the blood enters the hollow organs and tissues of the human body, and then the gas passes through the lungs and exhales through the lungs together with carbon dioxide. Another kind of fart, held in the stomach, temporarily exists in the intestine, and after a period of time, it finds a suitable time to be quietly excreted or reabsorbed by the human body. So, don't back down until you have to. As the old saying goes, farting is fast, which is also scientific.