Guangdong sketch jokes in Guangdong

Find a Cantonese swearing joke, joke 1:

Three women went to the tea restaurant to sigh for afternoon tea. They ordered three old husbands' cakes, two cups of milk tea and a glass of frozen lemonade. Then, a waiter who can hardly speak Cantonese wrote it down and repeated it:' You chopped three husbands and got sick, two pulled firewood and one froze to death. Are you okay? "

Joke 2:

When I went to the teahouse for tea this morning, I met a new waitress and asked me in a little Cantonese: Did you have a thin brain and drank seven cups?

I stayed for a while, and I will come over tomorrow to ask if there is any tea.

He answered seriously: there are seven reds, seven greens, seven flowers, seven oolong goals, seven ... who don't know how to be meticulous.

I replied: Tieguanyin. Come with me. What snacks are there today?

Answer me seriously: there are horse pigeons, robe pigeons, horse-drawn pigeons and Zhong Youchuang. ...

As soon as I woke up, I immediately understood. Q: What kinds of bed training are there?

Tell me seriously: there are beef beds and pork beds. ....

Find a Cantonese swearing joke. Swearing should also be creative. Guangzhou Radio is an authentic Cantonese dialect.

: Tudou. /programs/view/fQEIypPtNvI/& amp； z

Are there any swearing songs in Cantonese that are funny? You play "Dalantang" on Baidu ... and on the cool dog. There are many of them. Some of them are very good.

Cantonese jokes will come in Cantonese.

There are two lovers registered in the marriage registry.

Librarian: What's your name, madam? Woman: I'm Rachel Finn. Librarian: I came to your department to get married, but the dress lady asked your name! Woman: I'm Lai Jiefen! Librarian: That's crazy. I am lazy and old-fashioned. Where is that man? What's your name? Man: I'm Wu. Librarian: Are you afraid to mention it again? Say it. Man: I am talking to Wu!

Find some Cantonese jokes XXX. Catch a stone boy, catch two mosquitoes and chickens, and call chickens uncomfortable. Go to the spring bag.

XXX went to fly the plane, blew it up in half, pressed the glass in the shit hole, went to the house to hold his breath and kicked the TV.

Also; 1234567 the fat woman danced on the top of the first section, but the red flag went into the shit and didn't come out.

You are bigger than a locomotive, your hands are thinner than peas, and your 7 (with an "out" in the door) is bigger than Lai. The bamboo team has passed through the isolation room, and an old woman thinks that cutting sausages is to send porridge.

Ask a joke in Cantonese One day, a father and son went to the store to buy wild animals. Father and son were separated because there were many people.

Go to the studio on the narrow road with Lao Dou (remember to follow the enlightenment)

At this time, the radio lady said to a microphone: Xu Fu (except pants), your old bean Xu Dingfu (except pants)

Wait for you at the door!

1, marriage registry, a couple to register.

The manager asked the woman, "What's your name?"

The woman said, "I'm Li Jiefen."

The librarian said, "I know you are married, but your family asked you what your name is."

The woman said, "I'm Li Jiefen!"

The administrator said, "It's crazy, alas! I'm too lazy to talk to you. What about that guy? What's your name? "

The man said, "I'm Wu."

The administrator said, "Do you dare to say? What a second person! I dare not say my name. Talk to me! What's your name? "

The man said, "I'm talking about Wu Guangjin."

A couple named Li gave birth to a son named Ben. One day, Li Ben suddenly ran away from home, so the couple went to the police station to report the case.

The policeman asked her husband, "What's your name?"

Husband replied: "Li Guangxian"

The policeman asked the woman again, "What's your name?"

The woman replied, "I live in Wugang."

The policeman was furious and said, "Kim, what are you doing here?" "

The couple replied loudly: "stability is Li stupid."

3. The highest level of playing mobile phones

The student asked the professor a philosophical question about life: "Professor, I want to ask, were you angry in the earthquake, angry, and buried?" Is there any difference? "

The professor said, "I'll give you an experiment so that you can get married easily."

So he opened the phone book, casually pressed the phone of a guy named PK and called him. The phone is connected, and the professor presses the zoom button to let the students hear clearly. ...

Professor: "What is Tony Leung Chiu Wai's degree?"

PK: "You have the wrong number!"

Professor: "Bie Ye! Tony Leung Chiu Wai Department? "

PK: "You have the wrong number!" Then he hung up.

After that, the professor called immediately. ...

Professor: "What is Tony Leung Chiu Wai's degree?"

PK Wang: "One side! You have the wrong number. "

Professor: "What is Tony Leung Chiu Wai's degree?"

PK Wang: "Your mother is obsessed with marriage." Hang up again.

The professor told the students, "D is angry! Staying with me makes you angry! "

The professor called again. ...

Professor: "What is Tony Leung Chiu Wai's degree?"

PK Wang: "You owe me five elements? I want Tony Leung Chiu Wai to go to China! Your mother ya, if you have the courage, beat Li, bow to me ... ". Say that finish more vigorously swinging the phone.

The professor told the students, "D is anger. Stay with me so that you can get off the field and call it an earthquake! "

Then, the professor dialed another number, and this time it took a while before someone answered. As soon as the phone is connected ...

PK Wang: "Top your lungs! B Your mother ... "When he swore. ...

Professor: "Excuse me, are you from Mi PK?"

PK Wang: "Oh! I'm sorry, because someone played a prank first, and I didn't want to provoke you ... "

Professor: "Never mind. Excuse me, Tony Leung Chiu Wai's degree? "

PK Wang: "Wow! Your servant ... "The professor hung up the phone before PK finished this time.

The professor told the students, "D is an earthquake, do you understand?"

The student replied, "I totally understand the sun!" " "

The student nodded: "But ... is Ye Ye in distress situation?"

The professor smiled and dialed the same number again. The other party quickly picked up the phone. ...

PK Wang: "Hey! You silly boy, do you want to fight wild? "

Professor: "I'm Tony Leung Chiu Wai. Excuse me, is there a phone call for me ... "

In Cantonese, the five words of swearing in Guangdong are also called "five tigers", "five lords of doors" or "five lords of cursing", and the five words of "Li" are: * * * [] (the word "door" plus "small") and "qi" (the word "door").

The first custom [editor] has curses, although they are all used to make everyone laugh or vent, but they are all explicit. Some films can pass the review of the Hong Kong Electronic Surveillance Office, and movies with a rating of 2B or below appear, such as:

bed board/plank

Family death

Sausage with vermicelli (homonym of "twist") [no source, no evidence to record]

Dog (dog is a homonym for "dog")

Shit and ghosts

Wulitou

paralysis

Small trumpet (homophonic for "mother")

Cantonese homonym replaces the words [Edit] "Fishing for crabs"/"Fishing for lamas and crabs" → * * * * rudder/* * rudder.

"Regional charm" → * * You are old-fashioned.

↓→ * * Your mother stinks.

↓→ * * Your mother sucks.

"Salted Shrimp Tank"-→ Home Shovel

"The boat on the shore" → Pigeons and pigeons

"Hard glue" ←→ (ditto)

"Frozen lemonade"-→ Frozen and twisted to death

"Frozen lemon tea" → Frozen twist residue

"Da Le Ning (Coke)" → Big Twist wok

"Everyone is happy" → Big pigeon.

"You care about you" → I care about you (meaning "I don't care about you/I know you through words")

←→←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←←85

"Click on you" → * * * Twist you

"Apricot with orange"-→ Household shovel

I took your mother's property. Hey, a lot of people died. I didn't see you die.

Swearing in Cantonese. Oh, I'm a Cantonese living in Hong Kong, too. I know.

"Twist", when used in some sentences, becomes a swear word in Cantonese. It refers to the male * * * commonly used by Cantonese and Hong Kong people. It is used to strengthen the role in sentences, such as:

It's none of my business.

Well, you know = I don't know.

Good twist = beautiful.