Ignore jokes

Super funny! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Glad to answer your question, I hope it will help you! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

On the first day of school, the teacher asked Xiao Ming, "Xiao Ming, 1+ 1=?" Xiao Ming said, "I don't know." The teacher said, "Then go home and ask your family." Xiao Ming went to ask his mother, who was quarrelling with others. Xiao Ming asked, "Mom 1+ 1=?" Mom said, "Asshole!" Xiao Ming knows 1+ 1= asshole; Xiaoming went to ask his father again. Dad is drinking beer. Xiao Ming asked, "Dad 1+ 1=?" Dad said, "Cool!" Xiao Ming knows 1+ 1= cool; Xiaoming went to ask grandpa again. Grandpa is watching TV. Xiao Ming asked, "Grandpa 1+ 1=?" Grandpa said, "gangster!" "Xiao Ming knows 1+ 1= gang boss; Xiaoming asked his sister who was singing the national anthem: people who don't want to be slaves! Xiao Ming knows 1+ 1= people who don't want to be slaves; Xiaoming went to ask his sister who was singing children's songs: rabbit, open the door! Xiao Ming knows 1+ 1= bunny opens the door. The next day, the teacher asked, "Xiaoming 1+ 1=?" Xiao Ming said, "Asshole." "Pa" teacher slapped Xiao Ming, and Xiao Ming said, "Cool." The teacher said inexplicably, "Who taught you?" Xiao Ming said, "The boss of these people. The teacher was startled and asked, "Xiao Ming, what are you doing?" "Xiao Ming sings: people who don't want to be slaves. The teacher shut Xiao Ming out of the door. Xiao Ming knocked at the door and sang, Bunny, please open the door. The teacher fainted.

I gave the landlord a cold joke and thought it was cold. I'll give two! Because it's so classic!

1, female: put it on!

Man: It's better not to wear it.

Woman: Wear it safely.

Man: Trust my skills.

W: I won't let you go without it.

Man: You look like a man without it.

Woman: Are you bored? Will riding a motorcycle and wearing a helmet kill you?

2.a, B, C and D, which word is the coolest? = => Ding

After working hard for most of my life, I finally bought a house in the suburbs of Beijing.

On the day of payment, I took out my mobile phone with trembling hands in tears and prepared to tell my family.

Who knows that the boot screen shows: Welcome to Hebei Mobile!

Respondents: E, E, Wei, Zhi Ao-Junior Magician Level 3 2009-10-2123:18.

The report said that one day, you were walking in the forest,

Suddenly, a big bear appeared behind you.

That's when you found out and ran away.

The bear is catching up.

What do you hope will happen next:

A was chased by a bear and eaten miserably-worse than an animal.

B ran as fast as a bear and finally ran out of the forest. The bear gave up hunting-it was an animal.

C ran faster than a bear, so he dumped it-worse than an animal.

Respondents: Soft Ice Cream-Newcomers in the Workplace Level 3 2009- 10-2 1 23:22

Report the stories of haha and hee hee.

one day

Haha and hee hee go out shopping.

Here comes the bus. Fight and kill, haha

Hee hee cried, Ha ha, ha ha, ha ha, you are dead.

Respondent: Shuiyuzhao-minor celebrity level 5 2009-10-2207:11

Miss prosecutor, can I see your underwear?

Respondents: Jay _ h 12 18- Captain Grade 8 2009-10-221:10.

Once upon a time, there was a snail .. One day, when he was walking, he suddenly farted .. Guess what?

The shell was knocked off? wrong ..

The answer is ..

Bullshit, of course. Keep walking! Otherwise, he will shout loudly: hey, everyone, come and see, I farted!

Interviewee: Watermelon Wandering-Extreme Level 2009- 10-22 13:00

Once upon a time, a glass and a coffee cup were walking on the road, and a truck was honking on the road. But why was the glass smashed and the coffee cup not?

-

Because coffee cups have ears and glasses have no ears (handles).

Defendant: coveted junior intern level 2009- 10-22 20:53

Report that I want to sleep

Respondent: a 264933 130- Intermediate Disciple Level 2 2009- 10-23 00:54

If you report this story, you must tell it slowly. For example, if you are A, the person you listen to is B.

Once upon a time, there was a bear. He is a polar bear. He's bored. He's super bored. He pulled out his hair, pulled out one, pulled out one, pulled out another, pulled out another, pulled out another, pulled out another, pulled out another, pulled out another, pulled out another, pulled out another, pulled out another, finally. .....

B was speechless and a little impatient.

A: Do you think this story is cold?

B: Not cold.

A: But polar bears feel cold!

Reply: gwx 44644- Jianghu Young Xia Level 7 2009- 10-23 18:32

Report haha, ask Jun Xiu of TVXQ, he likes it.

Respondent: Anonymous 2009- 10-23 20: 15

Report a friend

Do you know why Panasonic is not as powerful as Sony?

Because Panasonic (afraid of Sony)

Interviewee: lk 32 1 123 KL- junior magician level 3 2009-123 22: 02.

It is said that the origin of the cold joke is such a story: one day the little penguin asked his grandmother, "Grandma, am I a penguin?" "Yes, of course you are a penguin." The little penguin asks his father again, "Dad, Dad, am I a penguin?" "Yes, you are a penguin. What's wrong? " "But, but why do I feel so cold?"

A little nonsense, a little boring, to put it mildly, a little postmodernism. Modern people are tired of telling original jokes and come up with these cold things.

Xiao Bai looks like his brother. Do you know why?

Because: it's really like Dabai.

2. A polar bear stayed in a daze on the ice, and when he was really bored, he began to pluck his own hair. A ..........................................

There is a man who looks like an onion, crying while walking.

On a hot summer day, two bananas were walking on the road.

The banana walking in front suddenly felt so hot. He said it was too hot. I want to take off my clothes.

As a result, he skinned it.

As a result, the banana in the back fell down.

There is a hide-and-seek club, and the person in charge hasn't been found yet.

6. Draw a V on two fingers. What is this? Yeah ~ ~ Hands shaking down, what is it? It's fallen leaves! Ha ha ha, laughing me to death.

7. Stretch four fingers,

What is this?

Four,

Bend four fingers,

What is this?

Wonderful ~!

8. When the millionaire was driving a luxury extended "Lincoln" car through a village, he saw two beggars pulling grass at the roadside to eat. The millionaire immediately stopped the car.

"Why do you eat grass?"

"We really have no money ..." A beggar replied.

"Really, get in the car and go to my house."

"I have a wife and two children at home ..." A beggar muttered.

"Call 1 and the rich man points to another beggar." And you, call your family, too. "

"My family has a large population. Besides my wife, there are five children. " Another beggar said.

"It doesn't matter, all call, go to 1.

In this way, two beggars and their families got on the bus, but fortunately it was an extended bus. On the way to exercise, a beggar's wife said gratefully, "Boss, it's very kind of you to invite even poor people like us to our home."

The millionaire replied, "Nothing, I just came back from abroad, and my house has been neglected.". The lawn in the yard may be more than one meter high and you can eat enough. "

Once upon a time, there was a loaf of bread walking in the street. He felt hungry, so he ate himself.

Once upon a time, there was a marshmallow who went to play ball for a long time. He said, "I'm so tired that I feel soft."

10 Once upon a time, there was a lamb. One day, he went out to play and met a wolf.

The wolf said, "I will eat you!" " ! ! "

Guess what?

As a result, the wolf ate the lamb.

1 1, there is a generation gap and no cleavage-this kind of communication is very difficult.

12, who will definitely be eliminated from the game, wolf, tiger or lion? Wolf, because: Momotaro (eliminated wolf)

13. When will Chen Shui-bian be reunified? When buying instant noodles.

14. Why does the silkworm baby have money? Because ... silkworms can cocoon (frugal)