The funny story is longer

1. Teacher, you are playing with our feelings

One day, the teacher forgot to bring his textbook to class, so he asked the class representative to get it. Other students asked the teacher why he didn’t bring the book. The teacher said I had a test today, and they were all dumbfounded. When the class representative came back, the teacher said: "I lied to you, I have class today."

Then some of them complained with blood and tears: "Teacher, you are playing tricks on us. "

2. Don't be quiet

I remember that I was rehearsing the chorus, and there were always classmates whispering to each other. The class teacher yelled: Don't be quiet! Everyone laughed wildly. (He wanted to say: Don’t talk, be quiet!)

3. You humans must stay away from it

In the physics class, the teacher talked about radioactive elements and said: Radioactive elements are very dangerous. You humans must stay away from it! !

Wonder! Isn’t the physics teacher human?

4. Don’t blame me for falling out.

When our high school teacher once again angrily scolded us for not paying attention in class, he said: “If you do this again in the future, don’t blame me for falling out. People!”

5. The math teacher’s signature move is to raise two fingers and say to the students: “Students, there are three keys to learning mathematics well. Words: 'Practice more'! ”

6. Classmate, are you a woman?

Returning to the dormitory from self-study in the evening, I met my fairy sister on the road, so I followed her.

I always wanted to strike up a conversation, but I didn’t have the guts to step forward until the fairy sister was about to walk into the girls’ building.

He gritted his teeth, stepped forward, and asked the girl loudly: Classmate, are you a woman?

Later...Later, I enjoyed the supercilious eyes of that fairy sister for two years.

7. The motherland is not reunified, and I feel very depressed!

A little kid in a kindergarten was hiding in the toilet and smoking. He was caught by the teacher. The teacher asked him why he smoked. He lowered his head and replied deeply: The motherland has not been reunified, and he feels very depressed!

8. Who drew this butt?

A teacher went to the principal to sue her students. Her group of students said that the apple she drew was a butt.

The principal decided to severely criticize these students.

He came to the classroom, saw the painting on the blackboard, and shouted: "Who drew this butt?"

9. Flowers are angry and flowers are blooming

Wang Han is a first-grade primary school student.

One day, the teacher asked: "The text says that bees add vitality to the garden. What does this mean?"

Wang Han replied: "Bees steal pollen, and flowers become angry. "Bah!"

The students laughed after hearing this.

Wang Han retorted: "If the flowers are not angry, how can the flowers be in full bloom?"

10. How dare you ask for a girl in my class!

One day, I had three boring Chinese classes in a row, and the teacher refused to let the get out of class end. Finally, I couldn't help shouting: "I want to 'pee'!"

Teacher Furious: "How dare you shamelessly ask for 'Miss' in my class!"

11. Silly little dream

One day in class, the teacher was teaching that four times four equals How come, Xiaomeng didn't even listen to the class!

The teacher said angrily: "Let me ask you, what is four times four?"

Xiaomeng replied: "I...I don't know."

< p> "Go home and ask your parents!" The teacher severely criticized Xiao Meng.

After school, Xiaomeng came home and asked her mother (Ott’s mother): "Mom, what is four times four?"

My mother did not hear it and said: " Make a bowl of rice."

Xiaomeng then asked his father (Otto's father): "Dad, how much is four times four?"

It happened that dad just woke up. Said: "It's so comfortable!"

Xiaomeng asked her brother, who happened to be answering the phone and said: "You made me mad!"

The next day, Xiao Meng goes to school. The teacher asked yesterday’s question again, and Xiao Meng said: “Make a bowl of rice.

"

The teacher hit him with a pointer, and Xiao Meng said: "It feels so comfortable! "

The teacher dragged him outside and made him stand. Xiao Meng said, "You made me mad!" "

12. At least give it a squeak!

The teacher asked Xiao Ming a question in class, but Xiao Ming stood up but said nothing.

Teacher: Xiao Ming?< /p>

Teacher: Xiao Ming

Teacher: Xiao Ming! Do you know the answer?

Xiao Ming: Zhi~

13. Reasons for sleeping in class

I was not in good spirits in the first period, so I took a nap.

I was about to wake up in the second period, but I saw the teacher again. Sleep.

In the third section, if you are too tired, take a short break and sleep.

In the fourth section, there is an ancient saying: sleeping before a meal is the most noble; sleeping after a meal is the most auspicious. . Sleep again.

Section 5: Sleep.

Section 6: Sleep.

Section 7. I have slept in the first six sessions, so I will sleep with my girlfriend when I go back in the eighth session. How can I have the energy to sleep with her if I don’t get enough sleep?

Sleep, sleep, sleep! ! !

14. Ten classic students interrupt in class 1. In high school, the whole school must wear uniforms, and some students never wear them. The teacher in charge of this area squatted at the door to check every day. One day, the teacher saw that the student was not wearing a school uniform and asked him why he was not wearing one. The student was furious and said: My mother is not dead, why should I wear a mourning uniform?

2. An art teacher was somewhat famous, and a newspaper had a large report with photos, so he boasted in class: "Recently, classmates always tell me, Teacher, you are really good. Photos were posted..." A student said: "Is there a missing person notice? "From then on, the art teacher refused to allow the student to take art classes.

3. In the Chinese class, the teacher called up a sleeping classmate to answer a question. The classmate was confused and could not say anything. The teacher said helplessly: "You Could it be? Even if you don’t make a sound! The classmate said: "Squeak." "The teacher sweated.

4. When I was in high school, it was almost time to take the exam. One day in the geography class, the teacher reported a place name on the top and asked us to answer the minerals produced in the place below. Many places were mentioned. Later, the teacher suddenly asked: "What is produced in Jiangnan?" All the boys in the class responded in unison: "Beauties from Jiangnan!" "

5. When I was in junior high school, once the biology teacher was talking about the ecological environment on the African grasslands. No one in the class listened, so he got angry and said: "You all look at me! If you don’t look at me, how do you know what an African wild cat looks like? "

6. In a high-level mathematics class, the teacher asked one of my brothers: "Calculus is a very useful subject. What is our goal in learning calculus? The man was deserting at the time, so he said loudly without thinking: "There are no cavities!" "The whole class burst into laughter.

7. In the biology class, the teacher said: "Actually, weasels do not eat chickens. Scientists have done an experiment. They once locked a chicken and a weasel together. Guess what happened the next day? The classmate interjected: "Is the chicken pregnant?" "

8. In the third year of high school, my geometry teacher was an old lady who liked to brag and was very annoying. One day in class, she said: "I am highly valued by the Municipal Education Bureau. They always invite me. We went to study the problem together, and we were picked up and dropped off by car every time. I asked accidentally: "Three rounds?" "As a result, I was banned from taking geometry classes for a week.

9. When I was in high school, my English teacher (a middle-aged woman in her fifties) thought that some of us boys were not listening, so she yelled: "You guys What are you thinking about? "I was confused at the time, and I didn't know why I just said, "I miss you!" "The classroom was silent for a long time, just a pair of frightened eyes looking at me. The teacher stayed for a while, then pointed at me and yelled: "You are a stinky hooligan! "What an injustice!

10. When I was in high school, I took a labor class for the first time. The teacher was an old man. He introduced himself: "My name is Wu Shushan. "I suddenly had inspiration and immediately continued: "Looking northwest to Chang'an, there are countless pitiful mountains. "The whole class burst into laughter, and the teacher looked livid, and then I was punished to do heavy work.

15. Teacher and students

One day the geography teacher asked the students, where does the river flow?

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A student suddenly stood up and sang: The river flows eastward.

The teacher ignored him and continued, how many stars are there in the sky?

The classmate sang again: The stars in the sky join the Big Dipper.

The teacher was furious: Get out of here!

Student: Let’s go if we say so.

The teacher said helplessly: Are you sick?

Student: You have everything, I have everything!

Teacher: Please say one more thing...

Student: Let’s roar when we see injustice on the road. ah!

Teacher: Do you believe that I will beat you?

Student: Take action when it’s time to take action...

Teacher is angry: I will make you drop out of school!

Student: Traveling across Kyushu like crazy!

Haha, best wishes in advance to the brothers and sisters wandering outside