Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - 202 1 humorous sentences
202 1 humorous sentences
1, everything is going up, but people are getting cheaper and cheaper.
2. You are happy because I am happy, I am happy because you are happy, I am worried because you are thin, I am thin because you are sick, I smile because you are strong, and I am rich because I sold you a pig!
March 7th Girls' Day, that's a good idea. Women's Day will be celebrated in one day.
Failure doesn't mean that you have wasted your time and life, but that you have a reason to start over.
I would rather sacrifice the last virgin in China than leave any Japanese virgin!
6. We agreed to grow old together, but you secretly anointed it.
7. Why can you see the masculine personality of your beloved goddess? That's because the goddess doesn't hang you or porridge you at all.
8, men love to fuck, women love money! Men love each other without conscience, and women pretend to have an orgasm with their eyes closed! In fact, life is not easy, all TM depends on acting!
9. If you think I'm fat, make it clear. Don't beat around the bush and say that you really walk one step at a time!
10, otaku, as long as there is a power failure, it will degenerate into a caveman.
20xx Encyclopedia of Funny Humorous Sentences
1) You should know that the script of your life is not a sequel of your parents, a prequel of your children, or a foreign story of your friends.
2) After the graduation ceremony, a Tsinghua student got into a taxi and said excitedly, Hello, I am a graduate of Tsinghua! What a coincidence, driver. I am a senior, so the old man selling sweet potatoes said that he was not liberated when he graduated!
3) If you don't sleep in class, you will get drunk on the wine table.
4) If you see a shadow in front of you, don't be afraid, it's because there is sunshine behind you.
5) Who can be as loyal to double feelings as RMB?
6) Take a nap now, and you will have a dream; Study now, and you will realize your dream.
7) People often lament the lack of beauty in life because they lack a pair of eyes to find beauty.
8) People are made of iron and fans are made of steel.
9) Leave it to me, and you don't have to worry. There is nothing wrong.
10) The core of grassroots dinner is rice, the core of elite dinner is bureau, and the core of celebrity dinner is celebrity.
1 1) is a mirror, it is gold that always reflects light, and it is always flowers!
12) Only those who have experienced severe cold know the warmth of the sun; Only those who have experienced the hardships of life can understand the value of life.
13) Handsome is useless! Finally, I was eaten by a chess piece!
14) sometimes the killer of marriage is not an affair, but time.
15) I haven't seen the World Cup, and I don't know that wolves have more meat and less meat; I don't know Zidane, I don't know that I have a bad temper; I have never seen Yao Ming, and I don't know that he is too young; I don't know O 'Neill, and I don't know that I am a bird.
16) If you want to mix in the Jianghu, you'd better be single!
What is good luck? That is, I spent two dollars on the lottery and won five million. On the way to receive the prize, I bowed my head and picked up two more dollars.
18) lovelorn, you can find it again in the spring; If you lose your will, you must sharpen it in winter.
19) What a person shows off shows what he lacks in his heart.
20) When you feel that the whole world has turned its back on you, please believe that she just turned her back and brewed a better hug.
2 1) Not every effort will be rewarded, but every effort must be paid.
22) Sorry! I'm already dead! But thank you for coming to see me! See you at eight tonight!
If you hate me, I don't mind at all. I don't live to please you.
24) The more proud people are, the more they hide, and the more painful people are, the more they make a mountain out of a molehill.
25) The ideal of life is the ideal life.
26) Don't be a character when you are happy; Don't answer other people's books angrily.
27) If there is no health insurance and life insurance, don't try to be brave after dark.
Waiter, give me a cup of milk tea with more tea and less milk.
29) Those who lose money lose little, those who lose health lose much, and those who lose courage lose everything.
30) You are short-lived, and my obesity is temporary.
3 1) As long as the hoe jumps well, can't you dig the next corner?
32) If happiness is not on the road, it must be at the end of the road.
33) Advertisement on the subway: Is it crowded? Buy a car! Advertisements in taxis: Are they blocked? Take the subway!
34) Everyone has the habit of judging a person according to his first impression. He thinks that when a person is good, he will love me, love my dog, and when he thinks that a person is bad, he will totally deny it.
35) Other people's money and wealth are my property!
36) What are you unhappy about? Say it to make everyone happy.
37) I like you so much that you will die.
38) I am convinced that someone will come to this world because of my torture.
40) I allow you to walk into my world, but I don't allow you to walk around in my world.
Humorous sentences 202 1 the most humorous sentences
The Best Humorous Sentence in 20xx Years
1. Let me count, the temperature will not be high tomorrow.
2. Hard life needs no explanation.
3. A man as strong as an iron tower has never been beaten, scolded, touched or even talked by his thin daughter-in-law. Whenever I am angry, I go to the railway station and deliberately expose my money to the outside for thieves to steal. Beating a thief is a tragedy! Over time, all the thieves in the railway station knew. When he came, he said that this grandson was angry at home, and Nima came out to find someone to vent it on!
After visiting the supermarket, she saw an old lady spending RMB, so she took it out and handed it to the cashier. The cashier looked at your drawer and found no change, so she asked her aunt, do you have it? The old lady smiled from ear to ear and happily replied that it was not bad. I have many sons.
At the beginning of school, the new teacher pushed the door and came in, slapped us on the podium, looked at us coldly and said, I told you, I never talk about justice. The atmosphere in the class suddenly became a bit dignified. After a while, his expression changed and he said that I taught geography.
6. It's not that many men in China don't like dressing up. They are just a little biased in aesthetics and confident in honey. For example. The same is trying on clothes. My mother will ask me if it looks good, I will say it doesn't, and my mother will go back for a change until we are both satisfied. My dad asked me, do I look good? I said I didn't look good. He said you didn't know anything, and then he went out.
7. Yesterday, my then-old niece cried to me on QQ. Last night, she broke up with her ex who had been in contact for three weeks. She was very painful and advised my aunt that love hurts! I also sighed and asked what the world was like, teaching people to live and die together! Then it is a wise decision to say that 18 years old has not been in love.
8. After the athletes from all countries arrived at the Rio Olympic Village, delegations from other countries made preparations to prevent things from being lost, and only the DPRK delegation was the mobilization and staff for preventing things from being lost.
9. I met my roommate when I came home from work today, and found that he smelled exactly like his girlfriend. The scum lying in the trough really paid a lot of money to seduce Lao Zi.
10. The recent weather, lying in bed, braising in soy sauce; Exaggerated mat, teppanyaki; After getting up, steam; Go out to cook; Swimming, boiling; On the way back, it blew up; Go into the house and go back to the pot. Today and tomorrow, when you go out, you should pay attention to flanging, pay attention to the heat, bring cumin and Chili powder, and don't burn it. We are streaking, we bring salt for ourselves!
The funniest sentence in 20xx years.
1. I have nothing to do in the afternoon I was surfing the Internet in front of the accounting office, and I overheard two women chatting inside. A word from an ordinary gentle woman amused me. My man is really difficult to serve. He thinks my breasts are big in the daytime and small at night. When I get old, I will inflate!
2. Discuss with classmates in the school summer vacation, which homework you do, which homework I do, and then copy it! Follow the plan. As a result, my classmates copied my summer homework and sent it back a week later, saying that your summer homework and what you did were in a mess. I changed it for five days, and I was relieved after copying it.
As a member of the system, my predecessors told me not to offend two kinds of female colleagues. One is very beautiful, with a powerful michel platini behind it; One is ugly, with a powerful father behind him.
When Bei Piao returned to his hometown after many years, his mother came out of the kitchen slowly, holding a pot of tea in her hand, and told him with concern that she was tired from walking, so hurry up and drink. This is the tea made by mother. His face turned red, and he cocked his blue finger and picked up the cup.
5. News Tutorial An old lady fell on the road and broke her teeth. How did the reporter report it? Hong Kong press conference will ask whether there are hidden dangers in municipal road construction! Taiwan Province reporter will follow up medical insurance. Who will pay for the filling? The American press conference pays attention to how the marginalized elderly in the elderly society live. In Chinese mainland, it is said that "one person loses his teeth and everyone helps", "The road is ruthless and people have feelings" and "The old man can't lose his teeth?" 》
My husband has a pockmarked birthmark on his ass. One day, I chatted with my girlfriend and said that everyone on the Internet was discussing that if someone was injured and died in a previous life, the injured place would become a birthmark in this life. The boudoir blurted out that your husband was stabbed to death by cactus in his last life. Haha, boudoir is so humorous! Wait! How do you know what birthmark my husband has on his ass? !
I was depressed the other day. Tell my friend who is studying medicine that I want to commit suicide. Hand strokes indicate that the knife cut the wrist. My friend who studied medicine said that I didn't cut it like this. It can only be a skin injury, not fatal. Speaking of excitement, he drew me a starting point with a pen.
8. I will study hard in July, make progress every day, and never play mobile phones or fall in love again. If not, I'll send it in August.
9. While I was eating, the power was cut off. I quickly ate two mouthfuls of rice, and suddenly the light came on. I exclaimed, is this the legendary lesbian?
10. Walking alone at night, it's particularly dark around, and I'm handsome and afraid that others won't see me.
1 1. I want to go to the movies with my boyfriend recently. Please recommend me. Do you have a good boyfriend?
12. If God closes a door for me, please close the window conveniently. Dad is going to turn on the air conditioner.
13. Is League of Legends important or me? I dare to play League of Legends, not you. Who do you think is important?
The most humorous sentences recommended articles in 20xx years.
1. Since the final exam, my status at home has changed from a first-class protected animal to a wild animal, and my baby is in pain.
2. You can't be friends with people with less eyebrows. Take a photo to prevent whitening, because once her eyebrows turn white, they will disappear.
3. Once upon a time, two hedgehogs fell in love, and finally they went to the barber shop hand in hand to make two voles.
My roommate keeps a cactus. I accidentally knocked it over today. I quickly reached out and grabbed it back. I didn't say anything. It's so brave.
If you think I have any problems, please tell me. I won't change it anyway. Don't hide your illness.
6. If you are kind to others, I will have the impulse to strangle you instantly.
7. The exam is coming, which can be divided into two types: I took the exam and I took the exam. After the exam, there are also two types of people. I finished the exam. It's up to me. It's over.
8. Every time the aunt in the canteen hears the class is over, she will tell herself that the enemy still has a few seconds to reach the battlefield.
9. I eat quietly, just like I am quietly fat. I went to bed late, but I brought a whole body of fat.
10. Feeling ugly must be sick! Why else is the plastic surgery hospital called a hospital?
1 1. The boy at that station was very handsome, so I went forward and grabbed his potato chips and ran away.
12. There used to be a hide-and-seek company, but the boss hasn't found it yet.
13. Go and meet the person you want to see. When the sun is shining. When the breeze is calm. Before the flowers bloom.
14. Every time I walk in the street, I will see an ugly man holding a beautiful girl.
15. Every girl wants to have a plum, but unfortunately not everyone can become Qingchuan.
16. Why do you look like a joke?
17. Do you dare to take it off? I told you it was chocolate.
18. It's not people who are mean, but feelings.
19. Life is like toilet paper, so talk as little as possible.
20. When playing computer, my parents are watching, and I usually refresh my desktop. Don't order QQ if you have news, and listen to music calmly.
2 1. Dark-skinned comrades are invisible at night.
22. What did we do in childhood? You remember.
202 1 cold humorous sentences humorous sentences
Selected 20xx Cold Humorous Sentences
1. There are countless cages of time, but the most difficult thing to get out of is our inner cage.
Sighing is the most time-wasting thing, and crying is the most energy-wasting behavior.
3. Life can be played properly, but dance academy can't.
I'm going to cry. I'm going to make trouble. I stayed up all night and hanged myself with a bottle of sleeping pills and a small rope. No matter how ugly, you have to fall in love. When the world is full of love.
5. Journey to the West tells us that all monsters with backstage were taken away, and those without backstage were killed by a stick.
6. If you see the faults and right and wrong of all beings every day, you should repent as soon as possible. This is an exercise.
7. The first concept of learning Buddhism is never to look at the faults of all beings. When you see the faults of all beings, you will always pollute yourself, and it is impossible for you to practice.
8. You are lucky to have someone to help you, but it's just fate to have no one to help you. No one should do anything for you. Life is your own and you are responsible for yourself.
9. I am an unmarried young man who enjoys married treatment.
10. I'm a passer-by, and you forgot when you turned around. Why should I accompany you to the ends of the earth?
Classic 20xx cold humorous sentences
1. Cut the wire with a kitchen knife, and all the way sparks and lightning.
2. The direction against the wind is more suitable for flying. I'm not afraid of 10 thousand people blocking me, but I'm afraid of surrendering myself.
3. Strangeness makes you unable to understand strange things, and familiarity makes you unable to understand familiar things.
If you don't give yourself trouble, others will never give you trouble. Because in your own heart, you can't let go.
No one loves you with your hands in your pockets.
6. Human desires are like kites. You should drive it and control it.
7. Humor means that a person is interested in telling jokes when he wants to cry.
8. If you don't forgive all beings, you will suffer yourself.
9. Some disappointments are inevitable, but most of them are because you overestimate yourself.
10. In junior high school math class, the teacher talked about equation transformation. He rolled his sleeves on the platform and shouted: Attention, students! I'm going to change!
1 1. No matter what happens, get used to it, even if it is painful.
12. People who have insufficient blessings often hear right and wrong; Those who have enough blessings have never heard of right or wrong.
13. Although you wear cologne, I can still vaguely smell that scum.
14. A shy boy finally got up the courage to ask his beloved girl: What kind of boy do you like? The girl said: hit it off. The boy asked the same question again and had to say sadly, can't you have a flat head?
15. The world is suffering, without exception.
16. Time is too thin and fingers are too wide.
17. Trust is like a delicate snowflake. Never play with your hands.
18. Only by holding your hand can you know that your son is ugly and your face is covered with tears.
19. When life viciously turned everything into black humor, I followed suit and turned myself into a hooligan with a higher education.
20. Dogs chew bones and practice their mouths.
2 1. There are some things that you know are wrong, but you must persist because you are unwilling; Some people, knowing love, have to give up because there is no ending; Sometimes, knowing that the road has gone, we are still moving forward because we are used to it.
22. I am afraid that my father is filial piety and my wife is love.
Hot Articles of 20xx Cold Humorous Sentences
1. When you are happy, you should think that this happiness is not eternal. When you are in pain, you should think that this pain is not eternal.
2. A person is happy not because he has more, but because he cares less. A healthy mind is not because it has happiness, but because it has let go of happiness.
I am convinced that a person will come to this world because of my suffering.
I knew you were a monster as soon as I opened my eyes.
A word is worth two words, I will give it to you.
6. Life is like breathing, breathing is to take a breath, and breathing is to fight for a breath.
7. People hate lies, and sometimes they are willing to fall into lies made up by themselves or others.
8. Learn more, be less proud, take advantage of opportunities and get rid of laziness.
9. What is constrained is mood, and what is not constrained is life.
10. Discipline yourself and leave others alone.
1 1. If you are angry for one minute, you will lose two seconds of happiness.
12. Practice is a trivial matter.
13. The real society ruined my chance to be a good person!
14. Since both prostitutes claim to be graduates of famous universities, I now generally claim to be illiterate.
15. I am not a casual person. It's not a person if you casually get up.
16. I know most of my efforts are useless, but I don't know which half.
17. People who stumble over the same stone will not scold themselves or the stone when they look back.
18. Not only talented, but also fat.
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