How to choose love is wrong, and good love is to make mistakes.

A few years ago, I watched If You Are the One 2 because of Wang Shuo. As a seasoning for plain stories, Wang Shuo wrapped his antidote to death and farewell in a sugar-coated Xiaogang Feng commercial New Year film and mumbled it out. "How to choose marriage is wrong, and long-term marriage is to make mistakes." The moment this sentence flew out, I was convinced.

How to choose marriage is wrong. Do you think it's just to get married? Love, life, work, which one is not?

You said angrily that this man has too many shortcomings. I'm tired of this job. I've had enough. I want to change it. Do you think the next one will encounter fewer shortcomings and contradictions than this one?

Friends who have studied abroad can tell 1000 reasons why they want to leave, and friends who have not studied abroad can also tell 1000 reasons why they want to emigrate. All this is a besieged city, and I always want to come out and go in. If you had known this earlier, you would have lived more comfortably.

Love is a very expensive thing. When you meet another person, you still need the same long-term all-round running-in In every detail of life, you will inevitably not compare with the last one.

"I always want to travel during the holidays, but he just likes to stay at home?" "My predecessor always likes to take me to find special food, so I know to go to vanity and high-end restaurants that are actually not delicious?" "Friends are chatting together, and he actually throws such a wonderful point of view?"

In your mind, there will be a score table unconsciously. In every aspect of life, the former is on the left and the present is on the right. Add and subtract, there are high and low, and regret it after half a year. Is this feeling of come to a bad end not worth paying at all? If I had known that sadness was always inevitable, why should I be infatuated with it?

Early love is like carefully packaged food. Some people just decorate, while others pretend to show their best. A good-looking tempura doesn't know what's inside until you eat it. So after the initial stage, love entered the process of gradually removing the disguise. The shortcomings that had been concealed and the rhetoric that had been said were exposed like the wind blowing away the sand, until you were surprised by the truth of the other party. Then you get bored, saying that the other person has changed, not the same as before, and you can't go back. But the original appearance is fake, how to get back?

Take the same street, or go back to two worlds.

The first time I paid the bill to go to the movies, the quarrel inside, on and off, felt that every story was deja vu. A friend forwarded a very popular article, which said, "You will attract people who are yourself. When it is in full bloom, the butterfly will come. " You begin to wonder if you are not good enough, your personality is too capricious, and you can't meet people who are good enough.

You delete your literary signature and replace it with inspirational "don't forget your original intention" and "be the best of me" You begin to enjoy being alone and face yourself again. You are determined to be your own giant, learn cooking in class, and become more and more outstanding in your own professional field. You laughed at your previous dress sense and began to follow fashion bloggers, knowing everything from shoes to bags. Learn oil painting and photography on weekends, and you can also take small and fresh photos yourself. You are like an endless hammer, knocking on every short board and making up the length one by one.

You have become a better self, getting better and better, demanding the other half more and more, and no longer investing easily, even a little. You are afraid of not meeting in time, and you dare not try your best to love and hate.

On the subway, two boys and girls who look like high school students are close together. The girl said, get off at the next stop, don't see me off, or you'll have to take more stops. The boy said that it doesn't matter. Anyway, I will go back and sit at the end, no matter these stops. You laugh at it and think children are naive. But when you get off the bus, you suddenly miss 10 the boy who rode 10 kilometers to send you home, the boy who said you wouldn't marry on the beach five years ago, and the boy who accompanied you in a foreign country and told you where your home was three years ago. Where are they now?

You begin to believe that "what you can leave to the years, what the years can leave to you is nothing more than your best self". You think it's actually nice to be alone. You hear friends talk about contradictions in love or marriage, but they are not as sweet as you think. The pursuer's ignorance, rhetoric, and eagerness to move are easy for you to see through. You are decent and perfunctory, and your heart despises his inferiority. You begin to wonder why you haven't met the right person since you have become quite excellent.

The first sentence I want to tell you: how to choose love is wrong, and good love means making mistakes.

Don't object in a hurry. I also want to tell you that the best person you can meet in your life is likely to appear at your worst and most depressed time. You think you are good enough to have everything, but that doesn't mean you can have love.

"Want to but not, you endure for a lifetime. You can't take it out if you think about it. There is no wise man in love. "

Love is a growing process. Don't think that adults don't grow up. Good love is mutual growth. Don't deny it immediately, draw conclusions, say it's bad, and say that a person is actually quite good. As long as we can reach an agreement on our most persistent principles, other small details don't have to be forced.

Whether friendship or love, the core of getting along is seeking common ground while reserving differences. You know, no one will be in tune with you in all directions. You always need to choose. You will be more tolerant of your friends, because you know that friends can put aside their differences. And you are more harsh on lovers, from accepting each other and getting used to each other to changing each other and being changed by each other. You always want his tacit understanding to be highly consistent with you, always want to greedily eliminate that part of the difference, and even turn the other person into yourself.

I'm not trying to persuade you not to break up, no matter how bad your partner is or how broken your job is, I just want to remind you that when you want to break up, divorce, resign, return to China, emigrate, or leave home, you know that every choice you make will not be completely correct. There is no such thing as "I made a right decision" in the script of life. You will miss the old state. This is the besieged city. But since you have made a choice, you must make mistakes and go on without regrets.

Love and marriage, some people arrive early, some people arrive late, and some people just arrive. There has never been any difference between them.