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Men and women just know how to get along.
Men and women just know how to get along. It is unrealistic for two people to associate together and only rely on the feeling of loving each other. The way we get along with each other is also very important. Let me look at the information about how men and women just met and get along.
Men and women just know how to get along. 1. Leave enough private space for each other.
Many people's feelings are sweet at first, but after a period of time, there will be more and more contradictions and problems. Nine times out of ten, it is because two people are too glued together in the process of getting along, and there is not enough room for personal independence, which leads to the abnormal development of this relationship. Everyone needs their own space, but many people can't handle the relationship between their possessiveness and love well. They are too strict or too tight with each other, which makes them feel suffocated and leads to fatigue and boredom in this relationship.
Second, correctly handle the relationship between loving yourself and loving each other.
Many people's feelings often end in failure, probably because there are problems in dealing with the relationship between loving themselves and loving others. Once many people fall in love or have someone they like, their world just revolves around each other and they constantly make compromises because of each other. They have no bottom line in their feelings, they lose themselves step by step, and they don't know how to love themselves and hurt themselves in their feelings. This kind of person who doesn't even love himself, no matter how much he pays in a relationship, will inevitably be abandoned in the end.
Third, give each other enough trust.
More and more women are brainwashed by various marketing numbers, acting recklessly in their feelings, and threatening their boyfriends with moral kidnapping at every turn, even if it is to the death. If you don't do what you want, then the other person doesn't love you. As long as there is a little clue, you will doubt the other person's love for you. This kind of extreme distrust of the other party will make you feel particularly insecure, leading to a crisis of trust in your feelings and making men feel very tired.
Fourth, find common ground and hobbies.
Couples don't have to overlap completely, just have an intersection. More importantly, mutual understanding and respect. If you find a gap between you, you can create a common enemy or common goal between you, and then the gap between you will be narrowed. If a person can tell you something interesting that you have never heard before, would you like to chat with that person? Tell each other what you don't know, so that the chat atmosphere between the two sides will be good and the comfort will be produced.
Summary: In fact, if two people are together because they love each other, long-term stability is very simple, just need understanding, trust and tolerance. Don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you. When you do something, don't just think about yourself, don't always be moved by yourself or ask for it, but really think from the other side's point of view, and everything will be much better.
The most comfortable way to get along with the opposite sex is to "get along without getting tired"
There are thousands of ways to get along with feelings, among which my favorite one is called "not getting tired of getting along". In this mode, when two people run in, they will have a down-to-earth peace of mind and can be the truest themselves in front of each other. So I always think that the most comfortable thing about heterosexual relationships is the word "no".
0 1, don't force it
The most taboo in feelings is to ask too much. For example, there is such a lover who shows a strong side in front of you, forcing you to change your temper and personality, and even your living habits. In the long run, everyone will feel tired under the package of tension and oppression. There is such a love story in the play "Parents' Love". Naval officers in Guo Tao and Miss Capitalist in Meiting have very different living habits. At first, two people couldn't get along because of their different views. Later, they learned to be tolerant of each other, and they stopped forcing each other to change for their own sake, and finally they were happy together. Indeed, a truly long-term and comfortable relationship will never force the other party to do things they don't like, nor will it over-possess and control and impose its own ideas on the other party. But fully respect each other's personality and preferences and treat each other as an independent individual. As the saying goes, true love is not a shackle with love as an excuse.
The most indispensable thing in a comfortable relationship is respect that is not forced.
02, not wronged
In real life, many people have learned to be brave in their feelings, shoulder all the hardships and leave all the sweetness to their loved ones.
So: when no one helps you, pretend to be strong. When no one is distressed by tears, learn to smile and learn to deal with it. But when the other person is used to your efforts, who will understand your difficulties and take care of your feelings? In the infinite bitterness, I gradually understand that not being wronged is the most comfortable way to get along with a relationship.
When Xiao S, the poison queen of the entertainment circle, just got married, she wronged herself in order to please her husband. Obviously, I'm not good at cooking, but I'm embarrassed because I want to cook curry rice for my husband. When everything went against her, she finally broke down and gave up crying. Finally, she and her husband went to a restaurant and had a curry. Since then, Xiao S has stopped cooking. She said, "Why should I use something I'm not good at against myself?" What happens to stars may be a bit exaggerated, but in a small way, the true meaning of feelings is like this. Never wronged yourself for feelings.
Many times, you are too wronged to get the treasure you deserve, but you have to face more demands and accusations, and your sincerity will be disappointed in vain. The most comfortable feeling is the trust and peace of being willing to give one heart to another, so you never have to compromise yourself to achieve it.
03, thankless
Love and please are two concepts, but many people who are deeply in love are often confused and think that they are trying to love, but they are actually trying to please their other half. Love is very humble.
In fact, if a relationship is barely maintained by "please", it will often end in a black and blue result. As far as feelings are concerned, the more flattering, the more unfortunate, the more inferior, and the more difficult it is to be perfect. In the program "Men Do Housework", Dany said that when she quarreled with Zhou Yiwei, Zhou Yiwei said, I will give you a step down now. If you don't come down, the back steps will be gone. Dany had to climb down the steps and they made up again. Many netizens complained that Dany was too flattering in this relationship and lost her self-esteem. Throughout all people who love each other, there is a steelyard in their hearts to measure the relationship between them, and the balance point of this steelyard is the equal opposition of two people. Just like a passage of the heroine in Jane Eyre: "I am poor, humble and unattractive, but when our souls come to God through the grave, we are all equal."
Indeed, a comfortable relationship is the mutual benefit and symbiosis of two people who love each other, and it is also the equality and independence of loving themselves first and then others, rather than flattering anyone.
The best interpretation of feelings is like a sentence in Rose Island: "The best love is that two people are partners, not bound or entangled, standing side by side and watching this lonely world." It is true that love is the icing on the cake of life, not the heavy shackles that drag you down.
Men and women just know how to get along with each other. 2. The first way: both people know how to give what they want.
After two people get together, everyone hopes to get along for a long time, but because in the early days of love, they don't know each other very well. After a long time, through communication, I get to know each other better, know what they like to eat, what they like to play, and what they are thinking. At this time, if you can give the other person some needs that you really want, the relationship will definitely get better and better.
The most fearful thing in feelings is that neither of them is paying for the other, but they are thinking of asking for it from the other. Then such feelings can't continue after all, which will make the hearts of two people farther and farther away.
Second, equal status and mutual respect.
Zhang Ailing has a saying: When I met you, I became very low, as low as dust. Many people like this sentence, but in a relationship, if two people get along with each other and one of them falls when it hurts, then often this relationship will not last in the end.
For a simple example, if you are the host, you will be kind to your nanny, but at this time, you often look down on him. You think the other person is not as good as you. Do you think his position is not as high as yours, and he will be treated equally in your language and behavior? Some people may, but a large number of people often don't
Especially in a relationship, if two people don't respect each other, then there is often no way to maintain this relationship. At the same time, this respect not only refers to the respect between two people, but also includes the respect for each other's friends, colleagues and family. Only by respecting each other can the relationship between two people be maintained for a long time.
The third kind: there is some space between two people.
Some time ago, a boy found me. He told me that his ex-girlfriend was going to break up with him, which was particularly uncomfortable and I didn't know what to do. Later, after communication, I found that this man was always afraid of his girlfriend leaving him because he was particularly insecure, so he took his girlfriend very tightly.
He doesn't allow girlfriends, WeChat and other men on the phone, can't chat with other men, or even laugh at other men. Usually, when the clothes are a little exposed, men will talk nonstop ... slowly, girls can't stand the control of boys more and more and want to be separated from him. At first, she would tell the boys to have their own space, but the boys wouldn't listen at all. He didn't realize the problem until it was time to leave.
A good relationship often means that we have a common life, but at the same time we have our own private life and space. Otherwise, after a long time, two people will feel suffocated, which is not good for their feelings.
Men and women just know how to get along. 3 men and women just can chat.
1, chat more, whether you are male or female, try to make the other person talk more, and try to praise the other person, have a pleasant experience or joke or tell jokes. No matter what the other person says, don't criticize and complain, especially men.
If you are a man, try not to expose too many of your shortcomings and problems when you are unfamiliar at first. Some people may say, isn't it good to be honest with each other? This is of course good, but what you need to know is that to really enter the love mode, you must first establish the woman's trust in you and a relatively tall image. In love, a woman relies on imagining that man and falling in love with this imaginary prince charming, and then empathizing with you in reality. Therefore, in the early stage of love, we should give each other a space for fantasy expectation. As for confessing your own shortcomings, as long as it is not a big shortcoming, you can gradually get familiar with each other, and it is no problem for the other party to gradually infiltrate after establishing a certain trust in you.
3. The most suitable place for dating is a place where you can chat and do some leisure activities, such as visiting amusement parks, watching movies, playing ball games and so on. In this way, compared with simply sitting opposite the cafe and chatting, the pressure will be much less, and the topic will become relaxed and happy when talking in a relaxed and pleasant amusement environment.
4. Try not to discuss complicated issues through various online chats such as WeChat and QQ. Typing and chatting can easily lead to misunderstanding between the two sides. Different words and punctuation will make the other side feel different about the same sentence. If one party is in a bad mood, everything you type will be viewed in a negative and malicious way, resulting in various associations. Women are generally more imaginative and sensitive than men, so this situation is easy to happen, and such a conversation will eventually end in discord. Meeting to discuss problems is the best way. If you can't meet in time, then telephone communication is ok, which is much better than sending all kinds of messages.
5. Learn to listen while chatting. When the opposite party tells you his/her experience, don't grab words or interrupt the other party at will. Instead, look at the other person's eyes with a smile, let the other person feel your concern and concern, and express your interest in him/her in time.
6, know how to appreciate. Always let the other person know what we like most about him/her and what qualities or advantages he/she has that make you proud and happy. This is not just something to do in the early days of love, but throughout our lives. Learn to encourage and support each other constantly, so that you can not only give full play to each other's potential, but also make your relationship more and more harmonious.
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