What is the psychology of parents being forced to get married?

Poor inheritance. For those who are forced to get married, one is helpless and the other is helpless. Many times, parents forced marriage, mainly may have the following psychology:

First, parents think each other's conditions are very good, and their children will be happy if they marry each other. Because at least life is worry-free, because for parents, children's material life is very good, and they feel ok inside. As for the spiritual level, there is not much to consider.

Second, many parents may worry that their children are far away. On the one hand, it may not be conducive to taking care of yourself when you are old. Thinking that children are around or close to home, you will spend much more time with your parents, less time to go home, and it is much more convenient to take care of them. So they may be forced to find their own home not far away and be satisfied with themselves. On the other hand, it is also possible that your children are far away and will be strangers in other places in the future. In case of being bullied or something, it is a bit difficult for them to save themselves. It is also out of concern and love for their children that they may choose to force marriage.

Third, I am afraid of jokes. Perhaps I am worried that people around me will say that my children have come from afar, and it will be more difficult to go home in the future, which is equivalent to losing my children, because on some holidays, people around me may be busy and the home may be deserted, so I will also be afraid of others gossiping or something.

But in general, the result of forced marriage is good or bad, because some people got married under forced marriage, and their emotional foundation was not very good before, but in the later period, both sides were very harmonious and happy; However, some people, because of forced marriage at home, can't stand it, and they get married in broken pots, and their later life is not very satisfactory. Let's treat parents' forced marriage dialectically, and try our best to understand and communicate our ideas. I believe this kind of forced marriage will become less and less.

what to say

Very contradictory, isn't it

Everyone wants to find their true sweetheart, the other half who has a good relationship. ...

I always feel that there is always another half in the world waiting for me somewhere.

So I want to stick to it all the time

However, parents are worried that we are getting older.

Especially in this era of more wolves and less meat.

I feel that after that age, I'm afraid I'll never find someone in my life.

My dad talked to me at that time and said that your generation always wants to find someone who suits their heart.

But what suits you is so easy to find.

Sometimes it's better to find someone to marry than to think.

So you don't have to worry about your parents, because parents think that as long as you don't get married, you are still a child.

Worried about you, worried about you.

But I felt it myself.

I can still insist.

I don't want my life to be so hasty.

Especially seeing friends around you get married so early and then divorce.

I feel a little afraid of getting married.

So I am particularly entangled, I don't know what the meaning of persistence is, or the meaning of marriage.

Perhaps this is the reason why many people, more and more people have been single.

I think parents are worried about their lives.

In rural areas in the late 1980s, it was normal for girls 17/8 to get married. As soon as I graduated from high school, a matchmaker came to me. I don't agree, but my father supports me to repeat. Later, I failed the college entrance examination and was recruited into a sheet factory. When you leave the countryside, you leave the matchmaker. But when I go home on holiday, I will always be urged by my mother; When are you going to get married? So-and-so has been your mother for a year, and how many children have you had? ...

I just smiled and perfunctory; Almost. Almost. Turn a deaf ear to mother's words.

But I married myself when I was 25. At the age of 25, she was already an old girl in the countryside.

After I got married, my mother began to urge my brother to get married again. She said; After my brother got married, she didn't have to feed pigs (at that time, my family's main income was pigs fed at home), and the burden on her shoulders was relaxed.

But my brother didn't listen to his mother's arrangement-the bank clerk introduced by the matchmaker. He talks about love with his students.

After my brother got married, my mother still feeds pigs, and the burden on her shoulders has not been alleviated at all. Follow my mother to urge my brother to have a baby quickly, and help him take care of others while she still has strength.

Most parents are like this, hoping that their children will embark on the same track-get married and have children. I want to see their children and grandchildren in their lifetime.

As children, even if we are annoyed, we have to endure it on the surface.

Because besides parents, who else in the world will worry about our marriage?

There are many reasons why parents force marriage. In my opinion, there are three main points.

1. Parents and children have different cognition.

Many people in their parents' generation have very different views on marriage from contemporary young people. At that time, they always followed a set of life processes: studying, working, getting married, having children, raising children, providing children with education, working, getting married and taking care of the next generation. In the minds of many parents, there is a great prejudice about what grades to do, usually marrying late and having children late, or even not getting married, which is unacceptable. So it is very anxious to see that the children are old and not married. In extreme cases, forced marriage will occur.

2. Comparative psychology

Perhaps a common saying of my parents' generation is "See who is who, who is what". From studying and working to getting married and having children, many people come through comparison. They have the envy of other people's children and the expectation of their own children.

3. Love

Although the practice of forced marriage is extreme and shows that parents love their children, it is more self-centered and does not take into account the children's feelings.

On the issue of marriage, as children, we still need to communicate with our parents more. Communicate your thoughts and future plans with your parents. At the same time, put yourself in the other's shoes and be considerate of your parents' eagerness.

For many friends who are still single over the age of 25, they will have the experience of being forced to get married. I am 29 years old and have never been married. What I fear most when I go home every year is to meet my parents, relatives and elders. Every time I see them, the first question is where is my girlfriend? Why not take it home for the New Year? No matter how you answer this question, you can't do without answering it. In short, you are very entangled and annoying!

In fact, many people want to get married after the age of 25, but many people can't meet the one that suits them. That's who I am and I'm worried about getting married. What if I meet someone more suitable for me? If you are married, the other half is not suitable for you. What should you do if you are noisy all day?

I believe that people who don't want to get married should still account for a small number. Most of them want someone to talk to when they are uncomfortable, not to sleep with a pillow in winter, and not to eat fast food outside every day when they come home from work.

I am entangled in getting married, let alone being forced to get married. Being pushed too hard doesn't prove that you are bad! Can't even find someone? Face and self-esteem have been hit hard.

At this time, the psychology should be summarized in this sentence: I really want to find a crack in the ground!

In the eyes of parents, it is normal for men to get married and women to get married, which conforms to the natural law of human development. Every time they are urged to get married, their most common words are human nature and they can't escape. For quite a long time, I have always rejected the word "natural law". No matter how they urged me, I wouldn't move. I usually work outside and have no time to get together with them. Even so, every call is an unavoidable problem. Many times, I am particularly afraid of receiving their calls. They never asked me if I was doing well outside when I called, only when I was getting married. I couldn't take it anymore, so we argued. After the quarrel, I went my own way. So I carried it to the end, and finally I entered the marriage at the right time according to my own wishes.

Now I know that a life without being forced into marriage by parents is an incomplete life.

Paradoxically, I don't want to get married, or I don't think I'm old enough to get married, but my parents are in a hurry.

Every time I go home, I hate being urged to get married, but from the perspective of my parents, it is also good for me. Every time I hear it, I am annoyed, but I have to understand my parents' good intentions, so it is very contradictory.

I can't imagine all kinds of ugly words coming out of my parents' mouths. So I quit my job in the city, moved away from home and got a husband in less than a year. To tell the truth, not getting married before doesn't mean that I haven't met the right person, but I just feel that I need to live first, then live and then get married. How can you get married if you can't even survive!

First of all, we must understand the good intentions of our parents.

Parents love their children, even if what they do is a bit extreme, especially on the marriage of their children, but their starting point is good. As the next generation, don't avoid your parents, hate them, and some even have a war of words with them. We must understand the parents' good intentions on this issue.

Although parents are forcing marriage, you know yourself best. Are you eager to end being single? Yearning for two people's lives? The point is that they are pushing hard. Are you ready to get married? This must be made clear. After all, marriage is no joke. You have to think this through.

Your parents are forcing you to get married, so escaping will not solve the problem after all. In this case, why don't you communicate with your parents well, let them know your attitude towards marriage and your own thoughts, and it is best to reassure them that they will not be forced to get married miserably. After all, which parent doesn't love their children?

Some parents really push hard and even feel a little persistent. If you have time, try to cater to your parents and try a blind date, and maybe you can find the right one!

Time buffer is very important. Although your parents are forcing you to get married, some things should not be rushed. You can choose to let your parents give themselves some time to think and then face the problem of marriage. Of course, at this stage, you have to do something!

I have been forced to date for more than a year, but I have no idea of getting married. My mother talks about me every day. Hey, what's the rush? Even if you can't find it when you are old, it is irresponsible to get married now. ...