Senior three composition 3 100 words: joke encyclopedia

Composition title: complete works of jokes

Close? Keys? Words: 3 100 words in Daquan Senior High School and Senior Three.

Word count: 3 100 word composition

This article is suitable for: senior one and senior three.

Composition source:

This composition is about 3 100 words in senior three. The title is "Joke". Welcome to contribute. Driving speed If you drive at a speed of 30 kilometers per hour, you can enjoy the beautiful scenery of the city: at 60 kilometers, please visit the court; 80 kilometers away, welcome to the most advanced hospital in this city; On100km, please-rest in peace!

"You're dying" The woman walked into the street with an evil posture, her ass kept twisting and the key was hard to resist. As soon as she turned around, she separated from the woman and fell to the ground. A handsome boy walked behind. By nature, she shouted at the devil, "Auntie, you lost your key." The woman turned to scold the handsome boy: "You are going to die, you are going to die. . . "Handsome boy speechless. Nonsense (1) In the first class, I scolded the teacher and asked me to go up and do a simple topic. So I went up with enthusiasm and two ambitions. Then I found that this topic was not simple, because I stood on it for more than ten minutes and still didn't know what it meant. Finally, the teacher calmly told me that this topic was the first question in the exam the day before yesterday, and then asked me to explain to him after class why all the answers on my test paper were accurate. Can I tell him that I copied my deskmate's paper in the exam? Of course not. I can only tell him that he forgot to eat "Twenty-one Golden Vita" today. And draw a lesson from this: when an old teacher smiles at you as soon as class begins, it will bring you a disaster.

(2) strangle your class and strangle your teacher to evaluate a composition. Every comment strangles the teacher. It is always a habit to read a few model essays. Unexpectedly, the first article the teacher read today was my masterpiece, which made my blood boil. Then I pretended to be modest and covered my face with my hands. Hint back and forth in an awkward tone. That's my article. Finally, the teacher finished reading the article, and then said earnestly, "Please be careful not to write such boring articles in the future, which is an unhealthy performance of writing style!"

"So I covered my face more tightly. (3) Yangko is said to speak grammar, and the teacher keeps saying that even if it is translated into Chinese, it can't understand English. At the end of the class, the teacher suddenly told me to stand up and mumbled for miles. Seeing that I didn't respond, I took the trouble to talk about it, but I still didn't get it. Fortunately, the deskmate reminded me in time: "On the book, the fifth line!

"So I read it scripted, and the students first paused, but then they laughed their heads off. I sat next to my deskmate inexplicably and told me that he was sorry for his miscalculation. The one I saw was still the topic. (4) I went to class to do experiments today, so I was very happy, although I didn't succeed in doing experiments before. And I heard that this time it is to tell us how to make money by ourselves. Let's see the secret. The teacher agreed to let us take the prepared money home. As soon as the class started, I couldn't wait to play with it, and then put the test tube in hot water to heat it. The exciting moment is coming, but nothing happened after waiting for a long time. Maybe it was too small, so I took an extra-large test tube and heated all the chemicals in the bottles and cans. There will always be now!

I feel like a medieval wizard. After some narcissism, I finally got nothing and broke the test tube in a hurry. So, I shouted in despair: "I am so obsessed with ghosts, what money do I want? Go to hell!" "

(5) Party on Broadway. The teachers are very happy, and they are all talking about terms that are unique to maternity hospitals. Students in New China can't take it for granted. Boys hide under the table and make strange noises, while female students cover their faces with textbooks and laugh ... Slip of the tongue jokes Sophomore students especially like to go shopping by bike with a MM in the dormitory for some time. Dressed up beautifully, they entered the elevator together. Suddenly, they remembered that the car seemed to be flat, so they said to her, "Will you accompany me to have an abortion first?" "~ ~ ~ day ... when I was in elementary school, a very annoying boy asked Xiaohong to borrow an eraser. If Xiaohong doesn't borrow it, she will pester him and beat him. With that, Xiaohong shouted with all her strength, "I won't marry (lend) you." At that time, the students immediately quieted down. Naked woman A naked woman ran into a taxi and the driver looked at her all over. The girl scolded, "What are you looking at? Have you never seen a naked woman? " !

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"The driver said," I just want to see where your money comes from!

"Funny joke 1 bus IC card was a few years ago. At that time, when the bus arrived, a tall woman came over. Her IC card may be in the back pocket of jeans, so as soon as she got on the bus, she leaned her ass against the credit card machine and got into the trunk with a drip. This woman is followed by an old woman, who is not tall. She feels very strange. Why does she only need her ass? So as soon as she got on the bus, she tried her best to lift the pedal and lean her ass against the credit card machine. After several attempts, she failed. At this moment, the driver said, "Auntie, what are you doing? Pay close attention to the coin-operated car. "Aunt said: Isn't that girl riding on her ass here? Haha, I see. The driver can't laugh or cry, so he can only explain to him that other girls use IC cards, but aunt doesn't understand that shrimp is called IC cards. She is still pestering the driver. " You are so unfriendly. When a beautiful girl pouts with you, you let people in. My wife has pushed your ass so many times, and you won't let me in. What do you mean? "Everyone in the trunk laughed, and the driver waved her in because he couldn't get off the stage. I misunderstood a foreigner holding a ticket from 50 yuan and waving it in front of the conductor: Did you see it? Have you seen it? ..... The ticket buyers are stupid, so they simply come up with a 100 program: Have you seen it? Finally, I learned that the man wanted to go to Jianguomen!

A thief, a gentleman, often loses his wallet on the bus. One day, before getting on the bus, a gentleman folded a thick stack of paper and put it in an envelope. After getting off the bus, he found the envelope stolen. The next day, a gentleman just got on the bus and felt a hard object around his waist. He felt it and saw it. That was yesterday's envelope, which said: Please don't joke like this, it will affect his normal work. Thank you!

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I once asked for money to go home by bus. When I got on the bus, I found that there was no one yuan change in my wallet. When I was in a hurry, I took out a ten-dollar bill and put it in the slot. Later, the more I thought about it, the more I felt timid. I discussed with the driver whether I could stay at the door and keep the money that the next passenger should have put in the slot for myself. The driver agreed. The No.5 bus soon reached the next stop, and many people scrambled to get on it. I stopped at the door and said to the first passenger, "Give me the money." The other party was stunned: "Why?" I didn't explain it clearly in a few words. I said, "Just give it to me, and don't worry about anything else." The other party stared at the driver, and the driver nodded by default. So, I got a dollar. According to the law, and soon received eight Zhang Yiyuan money. At this time, a big man came over, hunched back, shaved, and tattooed. Seeing that I stopped him, I said angrily, "Why? Dude? " I said, "Talk to you later. Give me the money first. " The other person's eyes are round: "What are you talking about?" I said, "Give me the money!

"The other side opened his mouth and asked the driver," What does this boy do? "The man was blocked at the door, and the people behind him couldn't get on, but the people in the carriage were anxious to start. Everyone shouted noisily," What are you busy with? "

Give me the money!

"The big fellow soon flat. I saw him take out his wallet from his pocket and hand it over. He said sadly, "boss, that's all I have." There are many of you. I'm impressed. Chase the car and catch the bus in the morning. By the time we got to the platform, the bus had already left. So I had to chase and shout: "Master, wait for me!

Master, wait for me!

Then a passenger leaned out of the window and said to me, "Don't chase Wukong. "Misunderstanding 7" A foreigner took a ticket from 50 yuan and waved it in front of the conductor: Did you see it? Have you seen it? ..... The ticket buyers are stupid, so they simply come up with a 100 program: Have you seen it? Finally, I learned that the man wanted to go to Jianguomen!

Get off 8 When the bus was waiting for the red light, a man shouted, "Driver, open the door, I want to get off." Is this the bus stop? "The driver growled." Just because this is not a bus stop, I will give you a chance. "The driver was speechless. A very fat woman got on the bus and couldn't find a seat, so she had to pull a ring on the bus. Unexpectedly, the driver suddenly braked, and the fat woman pulled off the pull ring and jumped in front of the driver. The driver looked at her and the pull ring on her hand and said angrily, "There are three sets. Send a signed photo to the driver! "

10 There is a beautiful lady in the seat. After getting on the bus, she took out the paper towel from her bag and wiped the seat hard. When she was about to sit down, she farted. A gentleman next to him listened and joked that the young lady really loves hygiene. After rubbing for so long, she still wants to blow!

1 1. The parrot and the waiter are on a passenger plane, and one person puts the parrot on the seat. The waiter on the plane happened to pass by and pour water for the passengers. The parrot said, "* * ~ Give me a glass of water ~" The waiter thought, "What is a broken parrot yelling at? It's rude to be angry with it. " So, the waiter ignored the parrot and walked on. At this time, the young man sitting in the front row of the parrot heard it and thought, "A broken parrot dares to scold him, no!

I had to scold him a few words and casually said to the waiter, "* *, give me a glass of water ~". This time the waiter was really anxious ~ ~ He picked up the parrot and the young man and threw them out of the plane ~ ~ ~ (In the air, the parrot smiled and said to the young man, "Hehe ~ * *. . . For example, in the first joke, the joke writer advised the driver to pay attention to the speed of the car in humorous language, which made it easier for the listener to accept that it was valuable for the young author to share the collected jokes with the readers, but if the young author could select some profound jokes to share with the readers and reveal the moral of the story, the article would be more meaningful. " Out of nature, busy calling a demon "was changed to" out of nature, busy calling a woman. " Thank you!

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"Change it to" Thank you!

""you will die. . . "You're dying ..." The waiter was really anxious this time ~ ~ The young man picked up the parrot and threw them out of the plane ~ ~ "Changed to" The waiter was really anxious this time, and the young man picked up the parrot and threw them out of the plane. "Wave lines are not punctuation marks, and wave lines in other places should also be corrected!

(China famous teacher: Teacher Wang) 2010-7-1814: 50: 00