Short English jokes with translation

Son: Is it wrong to hurt a person mentally or physically when he is unhappy?

Father: Of course, it is.

Son: Well, now I feel terrible. I failed two subjects this time.

Father (angrily): What? you

Son: shouldn't he be given mental or physical stimulation when he is uncomfortable?

Father: Of course!

Son: Well, I failed two subjects this time, and now I feel very sad.

Father (angrily): What? you ...

It's not like that. That's not true.

I saw seven girls sharing an umbrella, and no one got wet.

Oh, that must be a big umbrella.

No, it didn't rain.

I saw seven girls holding an umbrella, but none of them got wet.

B: Huh? That must be a big umbrella!

No, it didn't rain.

Compare other things? Compared with others?

Son: Mom, John has a pair of shoes signed by Gordon.

Mom: Is that all you care about? Haven't you compared anything else?

Son: Yes, his mother is more beautiful than you.

Son: Mom, John has a pair of sneakers signed by Jordan.

Mom: Is that all you care about? Won't it be compared with other things?

Son: Yes, his mother is more beautiful than you.

He won

Tommy: Johnny, how is your little brother? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.

Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?

Johnny: We played a game to see who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

He won

Tom: Johnny, how is your little brother?

Johnny: He is ill in bed. He's hurt.

Tom: That's too bad. What happened?

Johnny: We played a game to see who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.

I have his ears in my pocket.

Ivan came home with a bloody nose. His mother asked: