If you step on the item unfortunately

Before going to bed at night, my friend sent me a dynamic screenshot of WeChat. The familiar head portrait, still grumpy words and unreasonable tone made me recognize John at a glance, the colleague who quarreled with me in the office during the day. Although I have let it go, I can see that he is still angry. We have a circle of friends on WeChat. Although he doesn't name names, this kind of public finger-pointing is very helpless.

After thanking my friend for his kind reminder, the anger that has been smoothed in my heart rises again.

"True, it is a big fight. If you don't argue, no one in the world will argue with it. " "Calm down for a while, and then take a step back." ......

In order to avoid the spread of anger, the famous sayings left by the ancients and the popular chicken soup rolled in my mind in turn. Although my mouth kept muttering and persuading myself to "forget it", my body was honest: my blushing cheeks and impetuousness made me give up self-hypnosis.

I imagined all kinds of vicious counterattack versions in my mind, but a joke I overheard a long time ago made me give up completely.

"I accidentally stepped on the item on the road. Do you stop to compete with it or move on?" This was asked by an old colleague who had been in the workplace for many years when I first joined the work. At that time, I was a little girl who could only wipe tears when something happened, and I was amused by his words. This sentence is also stored in my mind as a joke.

When I think about it today, I feel deeply: it is said that people's IQ is zero at the moment of anger, and sometimes they really compete with each other.

Forgive me for calling all the emotional garbage people around me "Xiang". They always have a way to challenge the bottom line of your anger, making people want to hit each other, but they are not considerate. But if you really learn from the ancients, you are angry.

In the face of resentment and anger, I appreciate Mr. Liang Shiqiu's handling attitude. In the article "The Art of Swearing", he frankly suggested: Don't swear at all, it's unnecessary. Swearing is a way to vent your feelings. If you want to scold, don't scold. You often have physical problems. So when you want to swear, what's wrong with swearing?

However, I guess I will never learn the top ten swearing methods summarized by Mr. Liang.

"Call names the most avoid impetuous. If you don't agree, your face will turn red, your muscles will jump, and your temper will be like thunder. This method of swearing is not enough to swear; Swearing should be implicit, implicit. If you scold him, he won't think it's a curse. When you think it over, you realize that this sentence is not a good word. Let his smiling face turn from white to red, from red to purple, from purple to gray. This is the superiority of swearing ... "These are the Sunflower Collection written by Mr. Liang in the war of cursing.

As a person who trembles when excited, then incoherent and confused, it is estimated that it is difficult to get the upper hand in the dispute between words and tongues.

However, if the resentful feelings are really self-reflection, unbearable and unable to take a step back, you might as well regard each other as "incense" and know that it is useless to continue to entangle. It is better to stop loss in time, get out early before it gets dirty, and waste time on other beautiful things.

2、

As Mark Twain, an American humorist, said: Never argue with stupid people, they will pull you to their level and then fight back.

In my opinion, this silent stop loss method is far wiser than nervous confrontation.

When I was in college, I witnessed a four-year dispute. The two sides did not mix a trace of bad words and brutal violence, but it was the fiercest struggle and the cruelest punishment I have ever seen.

There is a simple reason. Oranges, who are usually grumpy, failed to receive a friend's pre-test reminder message in time due to a mobile phone failure. As a result, it is conceivable that the oranges who couldn't find the examination room and seats before the exam missed the most important final exam of the year without accident.

Although this nonsense mistake sounds to have nothing to do with this friend, the angry orange still retaliates unreasonably: when others were nervous about the exam, the orange smashed this friend's books and daily necessities in the dormitory.

Unfortunately, this friend is also an orange roommate. Look up and see you every day. Although I was full of apologies afterwards, the persistent and willful orange never got up the courage to say sorry.

And that good friend, who is usually cowardly, did nothing but slip a trace of unspeakable anger on his face. There are still many people who can't stand it and secretly complain for her. At the same time, they admire her rare calmness and atmosphere.

Destroying books for no reason doesn't seem to affect the motivation of girls to become tyrants at all, and they still make great achievements; In addition, she is usually cheerful, and she never lacks friends around her. She is very cheerful when she sees everyone.

Orange is in an extremely embarrassing situation: perhaps she is embarrassed, she voluntarily quit the once harmonious roommate group, and in the huge campus, she can always see the back of eating, attending classes and visiting the campus alone; She didn't have many friends, and then she became more violent because of several failed relationships. Occasionally, because of her bad temper, others are implicated, but with a lesson from the past, everyone is drifting away from her. ...

I still remember that before graduation, orange was as drunk as a fiddler, full of tears, and vaguely said "I'm sorry".

I don't know if the girl with water-like personality chose to forgive, and it doesn't matter if she answered silently in her heart, but I know that the girl skillfully avoided a meaningless quarrel, stopped her loss in time with silence and distance, and restrained her rigidity with softness. Except for the anger that flashed at that time, the girl didn't even waste a little extra energy.

3、

Let's just tolerate those feelings that are hard to let go, anger that is hard to calm down, and unforgivable personnel, which we commonly call "Xiang". Everyone may step on them. If you step on them unfortunately, you might as well ask yourself calmly, "Do you choose to stop to compete with them or stop in time to move on?"