Stay-at-home moms joke while shopping.

Women can't lift their hands and shoulders, so delicate!

Suddenly one day he became a superman, omnipotent,

Fighting a bad dog, fighting a bucket with one hand,

Ask why?

The answer is: because she is a mother!

A woman who is weak as a mother is strong.

A joke vividly illustrates the mother's difficulties.

When a woman becomes a mother,

Don't say one-handed bucket is blocked.

You can sacrifice everything for your children.

Including life! !

Receive counseling and guidance on weekdays,

/kloc-9.5 out of 0 parents are mothers.

It's always mom who pays more.

But is this promise really for the growth of children?

Share a case with you.

I received a new parent some time ago.

The eldest daughter is in the third grade and the youngest daughter is 3 years old.

I've been a full-time wife since I had children.

In her words, after having children,

You can't be idle for a day!

Today's schedule is full,

Tired to death every day,

I have to help my boss with his homework in the evening.

I often can't help losing my temper.

Knowing that this will have an impact on children's learning,

But there is no way!

I often have conflicts with my husband.

Blame her husband for not understanding her.

Blame the child for not being sensible,

I feel depressed.

Actually, I understand her,

Such an intensive arrangement every day

I'm really tired,

It is inevitable that negative emotions can't be controlled.

Take it out on the baby!

Finding the problem is not just like what she said.

During the period when the epidemic was severe.

You can't stop by,

She can't take care of her sister and grandmother.

But they don't have any discomfort.

Her parents are in good health.

In the same city as her.

I usually help take care of my sister and grandmother.

Then I asked her a question.

Both parents are healthy,

It's not like my sister doesn't have time to take care of the children.

You're not the only one.

If we don't do this now,

Pay attention to your family of four.

Aren't you tired?

She gave me this answer:

Look at this case.

How do you feel?

Is there a feeling,

This is not narcissism.

Find yourself something?

It is through this mother's situation.

Reminds me of many consultations I have done before.

Many parents will encounter such problems.

As a family education teacher,

When I communicate with my parents every day.

There will always be such parents.

It's the baby. What's wrong?

I have made a lot of efforts myself.

As a result, the child still stood still.

There are also signs of rebellion.

When I first entered this industry,

Lack of experience and few cases.

Parents' feedback will be taken as fact.

Then tell parents how to communicate.

How to guide and how to operate!

I have been doing this for a long time.

Have more contact with children.

I found the feedback from my parents.

It's just his personal subjective feelings

It may not be true.

As a parent told me.

I have to stare at my homework, or I won't write without staring.

Don't wash, don't eat fruit, don't clean his room like a pigsty.

Only after washing will he know how to change clothes.

I've been busy for him all day.

..............

But when you ask the children,

If you have children, say my mother is just worried.

I know what I should do.

She is always worried about this and that.

Are you tired?

Upset all my original plans

Let her do it. I have no choice.

The Korean drama Please Answer 1988 has such a plot.

(Classic among classics, highly recommended, must see)

Leopard girl is a housewife,

A family of four, two sons, her and her husband.

Ms. leopard is a very competent mother.

Keep the house tidy.

In her eyes, two children and her husband

Is the idiot existence of life.

There are too many places in life that make her worry and uneasy.

Of course, this is also the case.

Once, the leopard girl had to go back to her family for two days.

This can make the leopard girl a little puzzled.

He left by himself, not letting the child and her husband starve to death at home.

But I have to go back and get something.

Various exhortations before leaving

When he left, he looked back step by step.

It's all written on your face Don't worry!

Within two days after Ms. Leopard left,

My husband and two sons really lived up to her concern.

Without her supervision and care

Sure enough, I lead an indulgent life.

Eating junk food and throwing clothes around.

Play games and watch TV!

Because the leopard girl took care of the whole family too well before.

Many problems did arise during this period.

The stove is not hot and the toilet is blocked. .....

You can't even separate the pot from the lid.

Finally, it was solved by the eldest son who likes reading extracurricular books.

Of course, it also made a mess at home.

Two days later, my son got a call from Ms. Leopard to come back.

Three people began to clean up crazily.

When Ms. Leopard came home,

Let her see that the house is as clean as before.

In order to reassure the leopard girl

Dad also said that there is no leopard girl at home.

They have a good life, too.

But the leopard girl did not show any happiness or peace of mind.

Instead, I went back to my room alone in frustration.

Father and son were all surprised.

I don't understand why

Obviously, they can take care of themselves.

Why is mom unhappy?

After the friend explained the reason to his second son.

The second son suddenly realized.

When I got home, I started to make trouble.

The original nagging leopard girl

There's swearing again.

Complain to the child again

I don't know. Without her

How do they live?

Can't do anything well

When she is not at home.

The children are doing well, too.

After nagging, Ms. Leopard's mood is obviously much better.

The last family had a good time eating and chatting together.

A fragment of this TV play

Being teased by many netizens.

Did you press my monitor?

Isn't this the state of my mother and me?

Then why is the change of Leopard Girl so obvious?

Obviously, the leopard girl doesn't want her children to have a hard time.

Then why are you so upset?

Then there is only one explanation.

She was afraid that she was no longer needed.

The same is true of the mother mentioned above.

She doesn't need to do many things.

What she called "tired"

Eager for the needs of your family.

And meet your inner needs.

Including telling my parents

Guide children to eat by themselves.

But children, grandmothers or grandmothers

Always chasing the kids. Hey.

I also told the old man that children can eat by themselves now.

But old people always have a reason to support their children.

It doesn't matter what you say.

This kind of behavior is also to satisfy

Grandma's inner needs are needed by children.

From a family point of view.

The leopard lady and mother mentioned earlier

The dedication to the family is touching and admirable.

When a woman becomes a mother,

The source of sense of value is more given by the family.

They will sacrifice and pay more for the happiness of their families.

Will also be needed in the family.

And increase happiness!

Therefore, the hardest thing at home is always mom.

The hardest thing is always mom.

On the contrary, dad will be much less.

No one can deny mother's efforts.

According to the situation of these two cases

The satisfaction of parents' own needs

From the perspective of family education,

From the perspective of cultivating an excellent person

This feeling of being needed

Is it really to help children grow up?

Does such efforts help children?

Or we can take this kind of being needed,

As a child's real needs.

Will there be a lot of our own needs?

But it is mistaken for the growth needs of children.

Or we just care about our own needs.

Ignoring children's needs?

There really is, and the most typical one is

Treat children as their own "accessories"

You must have seen such parents.

Children learn talent and learn what their parents wanted to learn when they were young.

Satisfy the lack and regret of our childhood

Children must choose what we like.

Directly deny and suppress what we don't like.

It is also to satisfy your own preferences.

Children want something beyond the level of family consumption.

Scold children for not being able to, not wanting to,

You can't be ignorant, it's not what you want.

This kind of negation has greatly destroyed children's sense of value.

Just to hide our own desires!

Instead of telling the kids that you deserve it.

But mom/dad can't give it to you for the time being.

You can definitely get it by your own efforts in the future.

Children should be obedient and sensible.

Those who don't listen are not good children,

If you don't listen, let the bad guys take it away.

Just to reduce their fear of trouble.

But it prevents children from thinking independently.

And judgment.

When the baby was born.

Parents will have an ideal child.

It will also be set in the children's own reality.

When the ideal and reality don't match.

Will criticize, will blame, will compare.

Go round and round, fall into a vicious circle

But forget that this is just imagination.

The real child is your child.

These are not the wishes and needs of all parents.

Impose on children?

I really don't know, but I'm shocked!

There is such a big trap hidden here!

Of course, no parents mean that.

Such behavior is just an unconscious situation!

The needs of Ms. Leopard made her ignore the growth needs of her children.

Therefore, children lack the ability to live independently.

That mother is needed.

Exhausted myself,

Vent negative emotions on children.

The confusion of this concept will really hinder the growth of children.

How to avoid similar things?

First of all, we must understand what the child's growth needs are.

What are our own needs?

How to distinguish?

The simplest way to understand is to respect children.

Respect him and treat him as an independent individual.

Equal treatment!

When children get enough respect,

We will not force our children to meet their own needs.

Enough respect for children.

We will not impose our will on our children!

Genetically speaking, children are the continuation of parents' lives.

But it is by no means an accessory to parents' life.

He should have his own independent personality and thoughts.

You can choose your own choice.

And parents just need to make him understand the price of choice.

And the consequences.

Enough respect for children.

From the perspective of appreciation

We are very happy to participate in the growth of this life.

Witness his course and changes.

Of course, there will be hardships and setbacks in the process of growing up.

He will certainly bring you a lot of confusion and trouble.

Please relax, this is the price and the only way to grow up.

And this is also your experience and experience with him.

Our parents' own needs are realized by themselves.

My ideal is accomplished by myself.

Don't impose it on children.

Because he has his own needs and ideals to complete.

If family education has a method, killer.

That's parents' attitude towards life.

The way parents try to fulfill their needs and ideal state.

It's bound to leave a mark on the child,

This will also promote his efforts and progress!

Your life is enriched by his arrival.

He will also be influenced by your company and education.

But stronger and more mature

Those setbacks and difficulties after many years.

You can also tell it like a joke.