Are there any jokes or upsets caused by writing or pronouncing wrong Chinese characters?

After the county magistrate finished speaking, the host said: "Pick up the pickles and pickles and pickles!"

(Translation: Now let the township magistrate speak!)

Township The chief said: "Rabbits, the dog has eaten today's meal, and everyone is a big bastard!"

(Translation: Comrades, today's meal is enough, everyone has a big bowl!)

No pickles, I’ll pick up dog poop and lick it for you. ． ．

(Translation: Don’t talk, let me tell you a story...)

A county magistrate with a heavy accent came to the village to make a report: "Rabbits, shrimps, Pig tail! No pickles, pickles are too expensive!”

(Translation: Comrades and villagers, please be careful! Don’t talk, it’s a meeting now!!)

The coach said: "The first class kills the chicken, the second class steals the eggs, I will make porridge for you."

(Translation: The first class shoots, the second class drops the bomb, I will give you a demonstration.)

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A foreign girl married to China. During breakfast, she was told that she couldn’t eat fried dough sticks: “You eat it with dip.”

She stood up immediately and was told again "You dip it and eat it!"

She was confused and said aggrievedly: "Let me eat standing up. I have already stood up, where should I stand?"

Here are my ears

The newly appointed magistrate was from Shandong. Because he had to hang accounts, he said to the master: "Go and buy me two bamboo poles." The master listened to the "bamboo pole" in Shandong accent. Becoming a "pork liver", he quickly agreed, hurried to the butcher shop, and said to the shopkeeper: "The new county magistrate wants to buy two pig livers. You are a sensible person, you should know better!" "The shopkeeper was a smart man. He understood immediately after hearing it. He immediately cut off two pig livers and gave him a pair of pig ears as a gift. After leaving the butcher shop, the master thought to himself: "What the master asked me to buy is pork liver, and these pig ears are Of course it's mine..." So he wrapped the hunting ears and stuffed them into his pocket. Returning to the county office, he reported to the county magistrate: "I'm reporting back to my lord, I bought the pork liver! "

The county magistrate saw that the master bought pork liver and said angrily: "Where are your ears!" "

When the master heard this, his face turned pale with fright, and he hurriedly replied: "Ears... ears... here... in me... in my pocket! ”

Made after seeing chickens

Once upon a time, there was a landowner who loved to eat chickens. Tenants rented his land and farmed it. Just paying the rent was not enough.

I had to give him a chicken first.

A tenant named Zhang San went to pay the rent to the landlord at the end of the year and leased the land for the second year.

When he went there. He put a chicken in a bag, paid the rent, and told the landlord about the land for the second year. When the landlord saw that his hands were empty, he raised his eyes to the sky and said, "This land will not be granted to you." Zhang three kinds. "

Zhang San understood the meaning of this sentence and immediately took the chicken out of the bag. When the landlord saw

the chicken, he immediately changed his mind and said, "I won't give it to Zhang San, but I will give it to him." who? "

Zhang San said: "Your words become so fast! ”

The landlord replied: “The sentence just now was ‘nonsense (chicken) talk’, but the sentence now is ‘made after seeing an opportunity (chicken)’. ”