A funny joke quote

Life is a big dye vat, with sorrow and joy. Everyone hates sadness and approaches joy. Let's use jokes to create happiness that everyone likes. The following is a funny joke quotation I compiled, hoping to help everyone.

In short, funny jokes and quotations 1 1, once I turned around and smiled, I was fascinated by the teacher.

2. When I wave my hand, your troubles turn to dust; When I smile, your sadness is thrown away; With a wave of my hand, you are full of happiness; I sent a message saying that happiness is running behind you!

It may not be the enemy but also your son who shits on your head.

Even if my heart is the liver and lungs of the donkey, it is enough to feed the dog's stomach.

There are so many brain-dead people in the world, but you have become one of the best.

6, but gold always shines, but when there is gold all over the ground, I don't know which one I am.

7. You have a hole in your head. There is water in the pit, fish in the water, and fish are spitting bubbles.

8. The real society ruined my chance to be a good person!

9. I'm not the kind of person who hits people when they are down. I just closed the well.

10, it's good to have more money and less money, ugly and beautiful, old and less healthy, and poor and rich and kind at home. This message is good, and it's my fault not to send it to you.

1 1, the highest realm of cuckold husband is the belt with three transgressions and five times.

12, life is like a news broadcast, and you can't escape by changing the channel.

13, I once liked her broad mind, but it was nothing more than an airport!

14, Fat, why are you always so attached to me?

15, growing old together is not just about dyeing a hair and knocking out a few teeth.

16, the so-called surprise is that the rabbit you are waiting for comes, followed by the wolf.

17, the most beautiful words in the world are not that I love you, but that your tumor is benign.

18, if people live by eating, that meal is not called rice, but called feed.

19. The purpose of installing a mirror in the bathroom is to let people pee and look in the mirror.

20. Flowers often belong to cow dung rather than people who appreciate it.

2 1, face the fucking life with a nonsense attitude.

22. The most tiring thing in the world is to live in hypocrisy.

23. The hero is standing, the bear is crawling, and my cat is hunched every day.

24. Sadness means that you can neither give up nor be dead set.

25. You add eggs, vegetables and ham to instant noodles, and you ruin the life of instant noodles.

26, eat, I want to be thin, I want to be thin. I can't have both, so I went there.

27. In the current weather, instant noodles can be directly soaked in tap water.

28. I have a crush on you because I'm out of my mind, and now my brain is shaking dry.

29, young don't run amok, what to say when you are old.

30. The cold water you spilled on me will definitely boil and be poured back to you. Do not believe, wait and see.

2 1. waist-length hair is popular this year, but we have short hair.

2. Losing love is not necessarily a bad thing. It can make people grow up and become mature and sensible.

The tolerance of brothers is not your capital to make waves.

We met at the wrong time, but separated at the right time.

5, I love love, I am in my heart, I am so erosive.

6, little me, wearing everything with secular eyes.

7. In the world of love, no one is sorry for anyone, only those who don't know how to cherish anyone.

When you touched my heart, why did you leave me?

9, the baby is not bad, women do not love, the baby is not rogue, it is abnormal development.

10, play with your life: you can only play with your life. If your life is gone, what can you play?

1 1, I am not a lady, and I am better than you pretending to be a lady.

12, love is the road, friends are pigs, there is only one road in life, and there will be many pigs on the road!

13, you shameless dog, I have really only seen this one in my life.

14, because it is said that the early worm is eaten by birds, so I decided not to get up early in the future.

15. What should I do if I am so angry that I am about to explode? Poke your stomach with a needle and let it pass.

16, drink today, get drunk today, and never retreat.

17, my figure is perfect, there is no need to make a fuss about my body parts.

18, smile after the exam, no matter how bad the score is. This is the dignity of scum.

19, the one on my face is definitely not acne, it is called youth.

20. I really want to slap someone and fan him to another planet.

2 1, I look so fat that I am swollen by life.

22. I would rather get drunk and make him uncomfortable than let him not drink.

23. I smoke if I don't obey.

24. Sometimes, it looks quiet because I am really tired.

A woman will have a group of brothers to accompany her, and a lovely girl will have a group of boyfriends to accompany her.

26, broken can be connected, broken heart can sleep.

27. put your shit in a plastic bag, don't leak it.

28. I haven't copied it, but I didn't say I wouldn't copy it.

29. A dog that betrays you is like a sanitary napkin. If you lose it, you can't use it anymore.

30. The sun will climb again tomorrow, and the labor examination will remain the same tomorrow.

In short, funny jokes and quotations 3 1, live easily and prepare for the best and the worst.

Never waste a minute thinking about people you don't like.

3, dripping water wears away the stone, not great strength, but deep kung fu.

4. The wish that can be realized is happy, but the wish that can't be realized is painful.

5. Accept the gift that life gives you, whether it is good or bad.

6. The worst thing in life is to talk about people; Life is so stupid that I have heard of it myself.

7. Some things in life are like sneezing. Although I had a hunch, I was always caught off guard.

8. If you have an equal heart and do convenient things, nothing in the world is compassionate. If you do compassionate things, you will have peace of mind.

9. What others say is in your head, and yours is in your heart.

10, the younger the psychological age, the greater the curiosity.

1 1. If you can't boast, you will be virtuous!

12, learn to bear, because there are always some unexpected things in life, so there is no choice but to bear it silently and face it bravely.

13, the past cannot be forgotten, but it must be put down.

14, don't always be dissatisfied with others, but always review yourself. If you are dissatisfied with others, it is yourself who suffers.

15, people who don't take a shower, hard perfume won't smell good. Fame and honor come from real talent and knowledge. Germany is naturally fragrant. To forgive others is to leave room for manoeuvre in your heart.

16. If you want to build a boat, don't hire people to collect wood or assign tasks, but stimulate their desire for the ocean.

17, narrow-minded and troubled, but broad-minded and rich in wisdom.

18, women are afraid of hypocrites and men are afraid of fake ladies.

19, for so many years, I have been learning one thing, that is, I don't look back, only regret what I didn't do, and I don't regret what I did. Every step of life needs to pay a price. I got what I wanted and lost what I didn't want to lose. But all the people in this world, who is not like this?

20, bad men are not bad, bad women do not love.

2 1, to know a person, we only need to see whether his starting point and destination are consistent, so we can know whether he is sincere or not.

22, the authorities are clear, and the onlookers are fascinated.

23. People live like this all their lives, so they should live easily. If you want to live an easy life, you must "remember what should be remembered, forget what should be forgotten, change what can be changed, and accept what cannot be changed." Only in this way can we live a' brand-new self' with personality!

24. There are two things to do in life: the first thing is gratitude; The second thing is to become attached. There are two hurdles in life: love and money. There are two kinds of breath in life: one is the breath of life and the other is the breath of spirit. There are two things in life: learn to earn money and learn to think. Two basic points in life: confusion and intelligence. Two States of life: making a living and having fun.

I think the best way to seek happiness in life is to respect labor. All happiness can come from labor, and all suffering can be freed from labor.

26. The truth is like a cough. If you can't hold it, you will spit it out. Lies, like lines, are often recited.

27. Do you know the difference between drinking and drinking? The more wine you drink, the warmer it gets, and the colder the water you drink.

28. Please speak out your dissatisfaction and grievances with sympathy and gentleness, and others will accept them easily.

29. The idea is right, good luck is coming, the idea is wrong, and disaster is coming.

30. If you have a selfless love, you have everything.

3 1, don't try to find any excuses for yourself, no one likes the excuses before the mistake.

32. Ugly sea monsters are not as terrible as ungrateful children.

Never give a friend who has betrayed himself a second chance to betray.

34. Being alive for one day is a blessing, so cherish it. When I cried that I had no shoes to wear, I found that someone had no feet.

35. Only by letting go can we better grasp what we can bear and grasp the most important thing. Only in this way will your life be more exciting.

36, headed by evil, all virtues Xiao Zhi first.

37. Try to enrich yourself. Don't stop learning. No matter what you learn, language, cooking, all kinds of skills.

38. Stay away from foolish love and approach wise love.

39. A person's life is actually very short. Don't think that what you can't do today will have a chance to make up for it tomorrow. As long as you do something harmful to society, you can't make up for it even for a few lifetimes. Therefore, thinking more about things beneficial to society and doing less immoral and unnatural things is the best answer to life.

40. Everything is difficult at the beginning, but difficult in the middle.

4 1. Work is entertainment, and entertainment is work.

42. A person's happiness is not because he has more, but because he cares less.

43. Seeing that you are not, seeing people is not at the door of all good, but the root of all evil.

44. It's good that you have nothing to hide in your life.

45. True goodness has kindness and kindness, while false goodness has kindness and no kindness.

Much as I like her, I have never told her. Because I know that what I can't get is always the best.

47. Being angry means punishing yourself with other people's faults, forgiving others, and being kind to yourself.

48. Don't forget your dream when you left school. Although you will sometimes be tired, confused and even pessimistic after working for a period of time, don't forget the promise you made to yourself when you drank the last glass of wine at the farewell party.

49. The weak do not take revenge, and the strong will take revenge.

50. Choose good people, read good books, listen to good words and do good deeds.